The Psych Ward
by GhastlyRevenant
Summary: Kishinuma Yoshiki's new job puts him as guard to a group of unstable, dangerous patients. He expects the work to be routine, but after meeting Shinozaki Ayumi, it proves to be anything but.
1. Chapter 1

Ayumi, Koga, Nakano, and Taishi were played by my friend(Keeroy). Yoshiki and Yuuya were played by me(Yuminii). We do not own the characters Ayumi nor Yoshiki.

* * *

Yoshiki was a little glad to be leaving the music store. It had been a nice gig, but it was mostly only part-time pay... He could do better, and it had actually been easy to land a new job. Sure, it was one of those 'undesirables', but the pay was good enough, and nothing was too bad for him as long as the money equaled out.

His new job... was being a guard, at an Asylum. Sure, at times, it'd probably be a hand full, but he could manage. Plus, this way, his budget would be in better shape by the end of the month. At this place, he could actually make enough to have some sort of profit that isn't contributed to food, or other home expenses.

It was the day he started, and as always, he was a little nervous, but everything would fall into a routine eventually. He dressed in the uniform he was given, and then left after making sure it was all in order. He made the trip to the building, and it's fencing sort of gave an ominous feeling. The less serious patients probably felt like prosecuted criminals... But the moral standing of everything wasn't his concern, really.

He passed the front door security, coming into the foyer-type area. The receptionist noticed he was new, and told him to wait there for another guard to show him around and give him the ground rules and basic duties. He nodded, leaning up against the wall with his arms crossed. He didn't like being new, because others before him thought themselves better, but ultimately it didn't matter. This was a good job, the best he could probably get without a school degree.

Koga disliked showing new runts around the facility, since they normally asked too many questions. The fresh-faced guards were always a little unsettled by some of the patients that resided in their lovely institution. Their fear contorted to some sort of sympathy for the psychopaths and crazies, which Koga found was a huge waste of time. The pay check was pretty damn great, compared to what cashiering or stocking would offer. He grumbled acknowledgement to a senior guard that said their was a new guy waiting for the training.

Imagine his surprise when he saw Kishinuma Yoshiki. Koga hadn't formally known him very well, since he himself had dropped out of high school in the 2nd year. He had no clue that Yoshiki had called it quits at the school too. He had heard others talk about the delinquent, so his reputation was pretty well-known for the small school. Yoshiki never was concerned with hanging out with Koga and his miscreant friends, which always managed to piss the group off. A delinquent who felt himself better than the other slackers. "Heh, well, lookie here. It's a regular Kisaragi Academy reunion," Koga noted as he approached.

Yoshiki grimaced as his senior was revealed to be Koga. He didn't know much about him, other than he was a fellow dropout, only with a more annoying and cruel attitude. He shifted his weight back onto his feet, his hands dropping back to his sides. His eyes were narrowed, and not very amused with his senior's comment. Reunion... Peh, the two hardly knew each other. The only thing they had in common was their irritation for one another. "Just get on with the tour," he replied flatly, not really wanting to chit chat with Koga. He'd like to start work, so things could just fall into place.

It was pretty damn obvious Yoshiki's attitude had hardly changed. Koga shot him a small sneer as he pulled up a clipboard with a formalized list. Lists were a big thing in this place, even though it was never formally checked you completed it. Put a few checks where it said 'medicine taken' and 'food consumed' and you were golden. "Alright, alright," Koga snorted as he began to walk."You're assigned to be with the class A group, but the actual training wants me to show you how to deal with each group," Koga began to explain in a monotone voice. This was so boring. Plus, Yoshiki was hardly an amusing audience. Most the guys in here were pretty cool and easy to get along with, but he doubted the bleached-haired boy would be anything like that. They headed down to the far side of the ward, the walls painted in pastels to give a false sense of warmth. "Group C is normally short-term visitors. Girls who slit their wrists and boys who overdosed... Basically, failed suicide attempts and small mental breakdowns are what you'll find here," Koga explained as he walked by some of the rooms. Barred windows allowed them to glance in to the sunken in faces of depressed and broken people.

Yoshiki followed Koga quietly, looking as they passed certain things. When going past the first rooms, which looked more like cells, he couldn't help but find a little disdain for places like this. They were for helping those with mental problems, but with rooms like these, they probably only made their problems worse... Well, again, it wasn't his problem. Since this was C, and the patients were probably considered the 'least insane', he was wondering what A would be like. The real problems? That would be fun... The real dangerous ones who never left. That was just his luck... and it was probably where Koga was assigned to too.

Koga moved back the C section, a little envious of the guards stationed there. The patients were the easiest to deal with, so the senior guards normally took the lofty positions for themselves. "Alright, down that hallway is the psychiatrist who has full control over what happens to the patients. She's the one who clears them for release, diagnoses them, and prescribes them medicine. She's a major bitch, so try not to piss her off," Koga explained briefly as they passed the hallway. It was rare when the guards ever needed to talk to her, but it was good to be aware of her. Although, he didn't give a shit if Yoshiki got in trouble or not, but if the fault could be traced back to insufficient training, he'd feel the brunt force of it. "This is B section. These are patients who show improvement and are on a path to getting release, but they're slower to get there than C patients. They're known for outbursts and such, because it proves hard to find the right balance of medicine and therapy for them," he droned on as he kept walking right through. He's done this spiel before, and it was boring those times too. "Over in those doors is the cafeteria. Group C and B for the most part get to go outside their rooms to it, but the group we look after is served food in their rooms," Koga sighed, shaking his head as obvious irritation at the fact cut through. He hated feeding those crazies, since they rarely cooperated. "You'll pick up the cart with the trays at 7 AM for breakfast, 12 PM for lunch, and 5 PM for dinner," Koga said as he made check marks on the clipboard. "Each lunch is labeled because the patient's pills are included with it," he added, making another check with a bored cluck of his tongue.

Yoshiki listened closely, which was about the only time he'd ever do so for Koga. His eyes followed to each place he pointed out. With the mention of Group A, he was starting to wonder exactly how bad these patients were. The most violent ones, no doubt, if they couldn't join the others to eat normally. Though, as he thought, he had to wonder why the newest were assigned to the most dangerous. One would think you'd need the best to guard the most dangerous... But it didn't matter. He'd do what he could, and hopefully no one would be a big problem. He nodded slightly, to show Koga he understood and to signal him to continue.

Koga glanced over the checklist once more, glazing over to make sure he didn't miss anything. With that confirmed, he continued on. "In that set of doors is the recreational room. The more stable, harmless patients get to go in there, socialize, watch TV, play board games... It's sorta like an old folks home in there," he mentioned with a shrug. "You don't really have to worry about that, though. No one in group A is allowed in there." Their unpredictable behavior and violent tendencies made it impossible to allow them out. Damn, he hoped he moved over to the B or C group eventually. Dealing with the lunatics in A was torture. "The nurse's' station is over there," he gestured down another length of hallway. "They'll patch you up if you get hurt, and they are normally circling around to check on patients." The chances of getting hurt were pretty slim in most areas but given where they were, it wasn't impossible. He approached a sealed door that wouldn't open without authorization. It was a safeguard in case one of the psychos ever got loose. He pulled out his employee ID card and slid it in the slot. The door beeped, a small green light going off before clicking unlocked. "Yeah, when you're done with this, make sure to run to the receptionist area. They'll take your picture and make you up your own card," he grumbled as he put the ID back where it had been. He shut the door behind them, making sure it had locked properly. "Alright, welcome to section A: Home of the greatest psychopaths and lunatics Japan has to offer."

Yoshiki kept his thoughts to himself, feeling more and more that these A class people were probably just getting worse without any contact. It's been proven that isolation had the worst effects to people... Yeah, he didn't have any friends, but he wasn't caged up like an animal and prohibited to any human contact, other than guards just throwing a tray into the room or any injections they needed. It was pretty sad, but what else were they supposed to do? It was true that the other patient and staffs' safety were probably more of a concern. It was too risky to let the class A's mingle with everyone else, but it didn't stop him from feeling a bit of sympathy for them. They'd never get out of here... If he was stuck in here, he'd rather his life cut short than just rot away.

He followed Koga into the tight security doors, his mind getting an idea of how dangerous these people were going to be... Though most would probably be tough to deal with at times, he'd like some specifics... "Are there... any specific ones I should be more careful around?" he asked as his eyes glanced around to the tough steel doors at either side.

Koga sneered at the patients, disdain towards the subhuman behavior of all of them. They all had their own weird quirks and disorders, and all of them presented a threat in some way. He paused for a moment at Yoshiki's question, considering his answer for a moment before speaking, "Yeah, the ones that you're not sure are crazy." He glanced in one of the rooms at a middle aged man chanting lines from Edgar Allen Poe. Koga slammed his fist against the metal door, the vibrations cutting the mans chattering short. Seemingly satisfied with shutting the man up, he continued to talk. "The ones that are obviously fucked up are still pains to deal with, but the ones with some awareness of all of this prove to be the most dangerous," he said as his eyes caught onto the different patients. "To name a few... Kizami, Shinozaki, and Ueda," he rattled off the names, grimacing as each patient came to mind.

Yoshiki watched the overly aggressive movement, that he wasn't sure if it was completely necessary. Were they not even allowed to talk? What a pathetic life to live... It was almost as if they were dead already. His eyes came back to Koga as he named off the exceptionally dangerous ones, though only one really rung a bell. It was all over the news, when he had worked at the music store. It was always on the TV they had up in the back of the store... about Kizami Yuuya. He was tried for a student's murder, but was acquitted on the grounds of insanity. That was a little... intimidating, to be working with such a person. But the security was tight enough that his life probably wasn't in danger."Alright," was all he said in response, committing the names to memory.

Koga marked another check on the list of procedures. For the most part, that would probably cover it... It wasn't like another guard was ever so far away that Yoshiki couldn't ask for information about the stuff he missed. "One little tip, before I let you off to actually work," Koga began to say as he lifted the police baton from his belt. "Don't be afraid to smack them around a little. Things become a lot easier when the patients are actually afraid of you," he said as he pushed the weapon back into his belt. They didn't get guns, unfortunately, since none of them had gone through the necessary training. The baton could do a lot of damage, though.

Yoshiki's eyes narrowed at the weapon, his dislike for Koga going up ever so slightly. How disgusting... The baton was in case you were in trouble, but he hit them to assert dominance? The patients, in turn, would probably be scared of him too... He didn't really like that, but it could be corrected within time. He certainly wouldn't abuse these people... They seemed to be handling enough misery around here as it was. "Is that it?" he asked, anxious to part ways with Koga. First, he needed to make a pass, right? Then... normal patrol? He wasn't sure yet which guards did what, especially when it came to the food. Were they assigned to give food to a particularly group of people? Like, alphabetical order... Oh well, he'd figure that out eventually. If he was lost enough, he'd ask someone about it, but he wouldn't ask Koga. He wanted to talk to him as less as possible.

Koga shot him a flat look as Yoshiki seemed to dismiss his advice. It wasn't smart to be kind or sympathetic towards these people. They were basically animals trapped in human bodies, unable to function in real society. If Yoshiki let down his guard too much, the patients would pick up on that. They'll notice he's a bleeding heart and use it to their full advantage. Yoshiki will end up in the nurse's station within days. Though, Koga wasn't against seeing such a thing, honestly. He'd love to see the newbie get cut down a few pegs. "That's it," he confirmed, because he was bored of giving a tour, but mostly he was bored with Yoshiki.

Yoshiki nodded to him, dismissing himself when he got the chance. He'd only use violence when he had to, definitely not to make them all submissive. That wasn't how he worked... And it was actually illegal. Without a sound reason, it was just pure abuse. But... he didn't really have a way to report it. If the boss of this place condoned it, he'd probably be fired for saying anything. He needed this job to survive at all... So he couldn't risk anything.

He went and got his own ID card made, and by that time, is was already around lunch time. He made it to the cafeteria, going to the back and casting glances at the carts. He still wasn't sure of which one he was in charge of, or if there even was an order. He was starting to realize how lost he really was... He had been to prideful to ask Koga hardly anything, but now he found himself a little clueless on what he was really supposed to do.

Taishi was a little early coming to pick up his set of trays, since he always liked to get a head start. It always took quite a bit of coaxing to get his set of patients to eat and swallow their pills as directed... As frustrating as it could be, he was able to keep his temper down by just telling himself he didn't want to be like Koga. It managed to do the trick pretty well. As he approached his set, he noticed a new guard standing around with little direction in his appearance. Taishi was wondering when they were going to replace the old guard who had quit after an... ehm... incident. "Hey, you're the newest guard in section A, right?" Taishi asked after approaching. He wondered who had trained him... He didn't seem to have any idea on how to handle the lunch order.

Yoshiki turned when he heard a voice that seemed to be directed at him. He glanced towards the trays, then back to the new face. At least it wasn't Koga... "Yeah... Is it really obvious?" he asked with a half smirk, glancing aside. It felt a little silly to be so lost, especially when everyone around could tell. He hated being the obvious new guy... But he really had wanted to get away from Koga. Just being near him made him feel a little sick.

Taishi had a sympathetic half smile on his face. It was hard enough to be fresh at a job, but not knowing what to do...? He must have been trained pretty poorly. "Heh, well, yeah," he admitted, since it was hard to not notice the lost look on his face. "I take it you were trained by one of the many asshats around here?" he asked, since he had to guess that's where the fault lied. There were a lot of guards around here who lived on cutting corners. While Taishi didn't exactly see himself with the best work ethic in the world, he was definitely leagues above Koga and the like.

Yoshiki gave a small sigh at the other guard's confirmation, but he didn't mind it so much. At least he'd actually get proper guidance. On the plus side, this guy seemed tolerable, much more so than Koga. He chuckled lightly, looking to the other guard with his default smirk. "Yeah... An ass I sort of knew in high school, even," he informed, regretting that he knew Koga more than he'd like to.

Taishi tilted his head curiously at the new information, brain jumping ahead as it tried to guess which one of the other guards he had been trained by. "Ah, geeze, really? Who trained you?" he asked, since there were a couple people that came to mind as being jerks enough to leave a new guard half-taught. Really, they'd all end up getting in trouble if trays weren't taken out of the cafeteria at all. Plus, the new guy not knowing what to do would just leave more work for all of them. The shortsightedness of the jerks around here was astounding.

Yoshiki nodded slightly. Though it was half his fault he was in the dark a little, Koga probably didn't teach any new guards well. He was just that sort of person. "Ibaraki Koga... He's probably the biggest ass of them all, right? Or at least close," he guessed with a small grimace. From what he knew in high school, when Koga had had his little band of bad misfits, he had caused a little bit of trouble here and there. Honestly, beating up other gangs or whatever was a little more humane than striking the mentally ill. That was just sick... He knew Koga probably wasn't the only guard here who did it, but he guessed his prior knowledge of Koga made him hate him more.

Hearing Koga's name didn't spark any surprise in Taishi. While he tried his damnedest to avoid Koga, because all he ever did was start stuff that was useless drama, it was impossible since they worked in the same section. "Oh, yeah, he's definitely up there," Taishi gave a small confirming nod. "I don't even see why he's always picked to train the new guards. He never does it properly, and then when crap goes down he finds a way to deflect blame," Taishi sighed with a small shake of his head. The fact Koga hadn't been fired yet was maddening. "Anyways, I guess he never taught you how the dining system works, right?" he inquired, unsure of how much this new guy knew or not. Koga's teaching was never consistent...

Yoshiki could see that with what he knew about Koga. He wondered how bad the other guards were... In terms of getting along, he'd probably have better luck with the patients than the guards. Well, save for this one, it seemed. He was pretty easy to talk to, so far. He turned back to the trays, giving a light shrug. "Well... I know we take these carts and hand the trays out to the specified patient... But in terms of which I'm in charge of, I have no clue," he answered clearly, his arms crossing.

Taishi gave a small nod as he explained what he knew. Considering there was a new guy, it meant the amount of patients the other guards had had for the last couple of weeks has finally diminished... Since the quitting of the last guy, they all had a heavier workload. It would be nice to get back to the normal amount. "Alright, you'll find out your group of patients in this folder over here," Taishi said as he went to a folder hanging off the wall. There was nothing marked or particularly noticeable about the manila folder, so he couldn't blame Yoshiki for not piecing it together. He opened the folder, pulling out the paper with his own name before moving through the other sheets of paper. "You're Kishinuma?" he questioned as he pulled the paper out. He figured he had to be, since it was the only name that wasn't familiar. He held it out for Yoshiki to take."That'll give you a list of the names of your patients, their room numbers, and the number cart you take," he further explained, since he felt like he had to make up for Koga's incompetence.

Yoshiki followed him to the folder. He probably should have looked around a little... but he knew better than to put all the blame on himself. He took the paper glancing at the names after giving a small nod to confirm he was 'Kishinuma'. It was a little awkward, since now he knew his name but he didn't know his senior guard's, but he didn't feel like it was fitting to ask his name. After all, they were just co-workers, he didn't need to seem like a friend. "Thanks, then," he said with a small nod, glancing up at him. With his nod as a make-shift 'bye', he returned the paper and went to the cart that had been specified on his paper. As he walked back to the 'containment area', he began to think back on the names. Most were unfamiliar, but there had been a Shinozaki. One of the dangerous ones Koga had pointed out... But he wouldn't completely trust Koga's judgement. Of course he'd be careful... He'd probably be careful with all of them. But he'd wait to see for himself which were the ones he should be worried about.

Shinozaki Ayumi was the last on the list... and since she had been described as one of the ones you weren't sure of their sanity, she'd probably be difficult to get to swallow her pill... But he wouldn't cut corners. It took a little bit to get through the first ones, but eventually he only had one tray left. He took a silent deep breath before sliding the tray through the slot. Through the bullet proof glass, he could see a girl about her age. He knew he shouldn't judge by looks, but she didn't seem dangerous to him... body-wise. Even compared to a normal girl, she was quite small. Though... it might have been under-feeding as well. Either because of negligence, or she just refused to eat.

Yoshiki kept his look calm and collected. He wouldn't show weakness, but he wouldn't try to intimidate either. "Shinozaki Ayumi? Your lunch is here," he informed her, in case she needed a little more alerting. A handful of the other patients had either been in their own world at first or just simply ignored him the first time. He'd test the waters, and take notes in her attitude.

Time was incredibly difficult to measure when stuck in a concrete room with no windows. The only indication any of them got of what may be happening outside was the meals, but no one in this place appreciated them very much. Getting pills forced down your throat and then a disgusting meal to wash it down... She typically dreaded the sound of the tray sliding in. Luckily, the last guard in charge of her had given up on trying to give her the medicine. She suspected he just flushed it somewhere, so he didn't have to struggle with her. So, when she heard a new voice, her eyes flickered up in annoyance. '_Great, a new one,_' she thought as she shot Yoshiki a glare. He looked like your typical guard... Around school-age which meant he either recently graduated or dropped out. She had a good guess of which option it was.

Ayumi pushed off the hard mattress that gave no way whether she was on it or not. She didn't care if she made someone's job harder in this place. She was going to make it very clear that she wasn't interested in her meds. It wasn't like they would ever be able to cure her of her ailment. What was wrong with her wasn't a chemical imbalance. She approached the tray, plucking the small cup of apple slices off it. The small portion of fruit, sometimes vegetables, was the only thing she would eat. The other muck on the plate was too disgusting to get down. She glanced at the small cup with her pills in it, but made no move to grab them. With the apple slices in hand, she pushed the tray back out for him. The muck food smelled unappetizing, so she didn't want it sitting around her poorly ventilated room. "That's all I'm interested in," she told him flatly.

Yoshiki watched her come off the bed and take one piece of food. Well, even when she was brought food, she didn't seem to eat much... Honestly, he probably wouldn't eat it either. He'd rather starve than live in a place like this... But, it wasn't his job to encourage self starvation. It was mostly to be hypocritical. He glanced down as she slid the tray back through, but she had to know he wouldn't back down so easily. Some may... He even had an idea of one person who would gladly skip the trouble.

He pushed the tray back through, his hand staying up to block her from just sliding it back again. He looked up at her eyes, and with that, he knew this would be tough. There was a certain amount of disobedience in her look... A look he definitely knew very well. "Also, you should eat more than that. I know that stuff has to be disgusting, but starving isn't a pretty death," he mentioned, since he didn't find it necessary to instruct her to take the pills. She could probably infer he wanted her to do that as well.

Ayumi's eyes narrowed as the tray was pushed back into her room. He was one of those types. He would eventually lose interest in trying to force this stuff of her, but for now she was going to have to deal with the fresh-faced newbie. His insistence for her to eat and take the medication wasn't going to change her mind, that much she was sure of. "Tch, you think there's a pretty way to die in here?" she challenged with a glare. She knew there wasn't. It wasn't like they would let her starve, either way. Feeding tubes were forced on those who were close to death that way. She plucked an apple slice out of the small cup and began to nibble on it. "And you probably have no clue how gross that slop really is. Might as well be cat food," she hissed under her breath. It wouldn't surprise her if that was the case... At the very least, it was cheap food of questionable origins.

Yoshiki shook his head, but the disdain she held was pretty obvious. He guessed he couldn't very well blame her. Besides, being disliked was nothing new to him. "I didn't say there was. Death isn't very pretty period, really," he mentioned with a small shrug. He glanced down, cracking a small smile. "I don't doubt it. There's a lot of things that compare this place to a prison, so it's not too far-fetched to guess they both receive the same food," he mentioned casually. He hadn't actually been arrested... but he knew people who had, and they compared the food to grainy mud. Wouldn't that be preferred over getting near death, only to have those tubes shoved into you? Well, he couldn't really say... He didn't really know anything about this place yet.

Ayumi watched him with a flat gaze as she ate her apples slowly. They were the cheapest of harvests, but it still had enough sweetness in its juice that she could actually enjoy eating it. The other food... it had some artificial flavoring, she guessed. The taste was unpleasant but manageable. It was the texture of the food she couldn't stomach. She raised an eyebrow at him as he compared the psychiatric hospital to a prison. It was a called for metaphor, but the mention of it set fire in her blood. Though, the way he spoke, it sounded like he had been in prison himself... He seemed too young for that, though. If anything, he would have been in a youth detention center. She didn't particularly care for his story, though. "Listen, I'm not going to eat any of that muck, and I'm not taking my medicine," she snapped at him. After all, that's why he bothered pushing the tray back in. She didn't feel like shooting the breeze with one of the cogs in this awful machine.

Yoshiki stared at her, his blank look returning and his hand remained over the slot. "Then... I'm not leaving until you do," he told her, his eyes determined. He could tell she wanted him to be someone like Koga, but unluckily for her, he liked to actually earn his pay honestly. He wouldn't let this place break him either. She probably thought he would, since he was completely new, but he'd stay on the same path. After all, work was the only thing he could do right.

Ayumi scoffed at him as she finished off the apples. Her stomach was still twisting for more food, but she wasn't going to yield. The fact she hasn't let this place completely crush her yet was the only thing getting her from day to pointless day. To start eating this cheap, disgusting food and taking their mind-numbing medication would just wipe away what little self-identity she had left. She placed the empty cup back on the tray and shrugged as she moved back to sit on her bed. "I hardly believe that'll be the case. You'll have to get dinner for the rest of your rounds or your shift will be over before I let that stuff touch my lips," she reasoned with an unfaltering glare. She knew she was being reckless in a way challenging a guard like this. Some guards would take it as a challenge and come in to force the pills down her throat. She's heard the thrashing of the struggles countless times. She'd been apart of it herself, for periods of times. It had been a while since she had actually taken any pills, and she was determined to keep that trend going.

Yoshiki gave a small shrug, his other hand resting against his side. "Well then... I'll stay as long as I can," he said simply, since that was really all he could do. He was pretty limited... He knew if this wasn't a job, and she was his sister or something, he'd definitely stay as long as he had to. But, he really couldn't stand here forever. Though, unless there was a big emergency with another patient, he could stay until dinner, and then some after that. So, he was going to do just that.


	2. Chapter 2

Of course, as Yoshiki had predicted and as she had determined, she had completely refused to eat. Since it was dinner time, he had no choice but to back down. "Tomorrow, then..," he said with a half smile, sliding the tray back over through the slot and carrying on back to the cafeteria. Well, she'd definitely be a hard case... Maybe even impossible. As he entered the area to get the dinner trays, he gave a small sigh. His shift would be over after this, so he couldn't stick around to force it down her throat. Uh, figuratively speaking. He didn't think violence was the way to solve this. Maybe he needed to see exactly why she wouldn't eat... Though, getting her to open up to him may prove even more difficult. It was his first day, and he was already having trouble.

Taishi was coming in to pick up the next meal when he saw Yoshiki, who seemed to be much more aware of what he had to do. The job wasn't very difficult, past the feeding and medicating stuff. Mostly they just stood around and made sure the patients didn't hurt themselves or anyone else."Hey, Kishinuma. How'd your first round go?" he asked curiously, since he had a hard case on his list. Taishi was pretty lucky with his list of patients, since most of them were out of it... He was just thankful he didn't have Kizami, since just walking by that guy's room sent chills down his back.

Yoshiki turned his head at the familiar voice, but just turned back and shrugged. "Okay, I guess? Shinozaki was tough, as expected. She still didn't eat or anything, but I find it wrong to force it down their throats," he mentioned with another sigh, pushing the cart with mostly empty trays in an empty spot. He wasn't sure what he'd do if he was told he had to make them swallow everything. If they didn't take the medicine, it would be their own faults, right? Besides, if they were scheduled to stay in here forever, he couldn't understand why it was so important they swallow pills that probably didn't even really help. Odds were they just sedate them, so they were less of a problem.

Taishi nodded in sympathy at Shinozaki's name, since she was one of the notoriously difficult ones. He felt a bit bad they stuck Yoshiki with one of the most uncooperative patients. Plus, while Taishi himself avoided any force feeding and medicating, cases like Ayumi normally pushed the guards to it. "Yeah, she's a stubborn one. Most patients, once on their meds, aren't too difficult to control. Apparently no one's been able to get her to consistently take them. Though, I don't think the Psych in this place even knows what's wrong with her," he said as his eyes glanced over his own cart. Once dinner was served, he got to go home and the night guard would come on until breakfast had to be served.

Yoshiki could guess why that kinds of mental sicknesses couldn't really be healed by medicine, so it was just to dull them down. It also felt a little cruel, but a good precaution to the more dangerous patients. He looked to him with a strange look. "They don't? Then why force pills down her throat that probably don't even help?" he asked with a slightly raised eyebrow as he took his hands from the cart handle.

Taishi gave a small shrug, since he didn't know about a lot of the inner workings going on in this place. "Ms. Nakano is sure she'll figure out what's wrong with her, I guess," he said in uncertainty. He had never seen Ayumi turn, but he's heard about her outbursts. They sound very... unsettling. "Group A is a frustrating group to deal with. They've been marked down as incurable, so they just tucker them away in isolation... If anything, I sometimes wonder if Ms. Nakano is just testing stuff on them," he mentioned in a hushed tone. Everyone knew she wanted to make some sort of breakthrough that would put her names in the books.

Yoshiki actually gave some validity to that assumption. After all, if they were incurable, why were they to make sure they take medication that supposedly 'helps' them? Ugh, this is not what he wanted to deal with on this job... and it was still his first day. "That's the only thing that makes sense to me... Besides, in conditions like this, I don't think any sort of medication would help these people," he noted, though he wasn't saying it was unnecessarily cruel. Well... the guards were, it seemed, but the conditions did make sense, to a point. Isolation so they didn't hurt anyone else... But under such circumstances, they didn't have a chance of recovering. In fact, a place like that could turn a minor case into an incurable in a matter of months, even weeks. Humans didn't do so well in isolation.

"Some of them are calmed down by the pills... but yeah, these are people with some deep-seeded issues," Taishi said as he grabbed his cart. He looked at Yoshiki and gave a small half smile. "Unfortunately we're supposed to make sure they take these meds. Ms. Nakano may be calling you around soon if Shinozaki doesn't start obeying," he warned, since it seemed only fair he got warning he may be called to her office. Though, it wasn't like that meant he was going to get fired, but it did mean Ms. Nakano was getting sick of Ayumi's behavior. Although, she tried it with every new guard, and it never worked, unless the guard used violence against her.

Yoshiki gave a solemn sigh. He didn't want to be told he had to get physical with her. He'd say it counted as cruel and unusual, but still... he didn't want to lose his job. Then, a small thought came into his head as he went toward the cart he was in charge of. He glanced to the other guard, giving a look of curiosity. "What... even happens when patients are like this?" he asked, wondering if there was some punishment system. He was starting to get a little worried about her if that was the case.

Taishi glanced aside at the question as he considering how to answer it. The entire subject of their work was littered with questions of morality, and if they should be allowed to treat people like this just because they weren't in a good frame of mind. "Ah, well, it varies. Most the time, if they misbehave by skipping medicine and not eating, they get moved to an intensive care unit. They're strapped down and given a feeding tube and their medicine, until they're... stable," he explained with a small frown. Although, it was rare for it to get to that point. Hell, sometimes guards would lie and claim the patient was taking medicine and eating, even if they aren't. That's probably what happened with Ayumi's previous guard, he guessed. "There may be other methods used... I'm just not really aware of them," he added, since he was hardly in a position where he knew the even darker parts of this place, if they existed.

Yoshiki listened closely, and was somewhat relieved he didn't have to do the forcing... Though after the thought, he felt a little bad for the positive outlook. It wasn't very good for the patients... and honestly... he didn't feel like Ayumi was had a mental problem... Then again, it was only his first day. He had no idea how she looked when she really went out of control. "I see...," he muttered, not sure of what else he could say as a response. "Ah, well... thanks," he said before wheeling the cart around.

* * *

The clock overhead ticked before giving off a a chiming tune. It was about 5:45, then. Nakano sighed lightly as she tossed a pen aside, pushing up her glasses so she could pinch the bridge of her nose. It was a long day, but she had another couple of things to address before she could go home. She readjusted her glasses as she looked down at one of the many folders on her desk. Given it was December, they were getting a lot of attempted suicides, which meant a lot of paperwork and a lot of psych evaluations of not so interesting cases.

After another unsuccessful encounter with Ayumi, Yoshiki decided to actually pay this infamous 'Ms. Nakano' a visit. Not to complain, but to... ask. He had a small idea as to make Ayumi cooperate a little better... Uh, with food, at least. As he approached the door, he felt a nervousness in his stomach. It was only his first day, and he didn't want to lose this job opportunity, but he also wanted to actually help, if he could. He's always been dead weight to others, so he wanted to try something a bit different this time. He took a quiet, calming breath before knocking the back of his hand against the door.

Nakano glanced up at the knock against her door. She sighed lightly, hoping nothing happened that would create more paperwork for her. She pushed back from her desk and walked over to answer the door. After opening it, her eyebrow raised in surprise at the young man at her door. By his uniform, it was easy to assume he was one of the guards... perhaps the new one? She honestly didn't concern herself with them, considering there was a huge turnover. "Hello," she greeted curtly. "Do you need something?" she asked, genuinely curious. It was incredibly rare for a guard to come around without a patient in tow.

Yoshiki looked at her as she opened the door, and he gave a small nod in greeting. He didn't like adults most of the time... His boss at the music store had been alright, but those who didn't give him any respect tended not to get it in return. However... his job was in stake, and Ayumi's health. It's not like he cared about her so strongly, he just didn't like to see someone wasting away like that. "Yes... I'd like to ask permission to bring food in for Shinozaki... I know I haven't been here long, but it's easy to tell she's starving herself, and her reasoning was the food quality. I'd pay for it myself, so I thought it'd be more favorable to you instead of using money for feeding tubes and the like...," he told her, his face keeping a calm expression, despite the nervousness in his stomach.

Nakano's bored mind was much more alert as the guard began to speak. This was... very interesting. More so, though, she'd have to classify it as odd. The guards didn't care about the patients, they just did as they were told. The nurses would occasionally put a hand in like that, but most were worn away to apathy overtime. A small, intrigued smile crossed Nakano's face. "That shouldn't be a problem. You just have to let one of the cooks give the food a once over to make sure everything's fine," she explained as he eyes examined this new person. The patients weren't forbidden from gifts or objects from the outside world. Family often brought in homemade goods for the B and C patients. Some A patients had people drop by the occasional treat, but for the most part, the world has forgotten them. Everything had to be examined by a head-guard or cooks to make sure nothing was hidden in the object, but otherwise it was fine. She just never expected a guard to put out his own money. Although, she wondered how long he would keep up feeding her. She was finding it hard to believe he was concerning himself with the possibility of Shinozaki being hooked up to tubes... Perhaps it was the fact he was fresh to all of this.

Yoshiki knew it was probably unorthodox, especially for a guard, but he didn't really like sitting on the sidelines. There was a weight lifted from him when she answered. He had been worried he'd be denied, and forced to just do the dance with Ayumi for... whoever knew how long. Sure, it would put a dent into his money, but once he got his first pay check, it would probably be okay. Part of him couldn't believe he was going to take up the job of feeding a mouth other than his own. Plus, the things she seemed to like, fruits and probably vegetables too, weren't exactly cheap. But, he... felt lighter being able to do this. He guessed it was because he could actually help someone else for a change. "Alright... Thank you, Ms. Nakano," he replied after a moment of absorption, smiling slightly.

Nakano gave a small nod at his thanks, eyes glued on him as she tried to read out his intentions. She doubted he was trying to befriend or court the unstable girl... She couldn't figure out how this would benefit him. If the patients didn't eat, it didn't fall on the guards shoulder. Though, it was noticed which guards had the most patients going to the feeding tubes. "I'm just curious, you mentioned how this would benefit the facility, but why exactly are you taking this upon yourself? You are aware you won't lose your job if she's sent to the feeding tubes, correct?"she asked, wanting to make sure this new guard wasn't misinformed or something of the like.

Yoshiki was prepared to end his business and go home, to plan exactly how he'd manage three meals a day. It was basically the start of the month, and he'd get his pay check before or near his apartment payment, so maybe he'd be alright... He was known to pay his rent, so maybe his land lord would let him just double up the rent next month. Though, he paused when he was asked his reasoning behind all this. He considered the question, unsure of what to say to the woman. "Uh, well... I've been pretty useless to others, so... I guess I wanted to help at least one person in my life," he answered simply with a small shrug.

Nakano was unsure how to progress his explanation. Surely, if he wanted to help someone out in his life, he could find someone who would benefit from it more. Still, this may give her some interesting things to add to Shinozaki's folder... She definitely wanted to see where this would go."I see... Well, before you go, may I get your name?" she asked, so she knew who to ask for if she wanted to talk to him again.

Yoshiki didn't know what to make of Ms. Nakano. She didn't seem that bad... at least, as long as she didn't have a problem, he guessed. She also seemed especially curious in his motives... He knew it was weird, but he didn't know it was so interesting... Then again, psychiatrists loved strange things, huh? Eeh, it was beyond him, really. "Kishinuma Yoshiki," he answered clearly, feeling he should muster the best amount of professionalism in his tone that he could manage around this woman.

Kishinuma Yoshiki... Yes, he was the newest hire. Nakano was interested to see if this man's generosity would continue on, or he would eventually stop caring. Especially once he saw one of Ayumi's breakdown, because before that point, most people thought she shouldn't be in here."Well, Kishinuma, it was nice talking to you," she said with a smile. "I'm sure I'll be seeing you around," she added on. She'd be keeping an eye on his behavior and how it may influence Shinozaki.

Yoshiki nodded to her, returning the smile, though his was a bit smaller. He was unsure of what he should say back, so he guessed he'd end it with that nod. He left her office, closing the door behind him before going off to leave. Now it was time to figure this all out... and hopefully, she'd eat it. If not... he was in for it.

* * *

Yoshiki came in a little before breakfast, though today he had a backpack, which had in it the three meals. He had to come earlier than yesterday, so the chefs could check on everything. He doubted they cared so much. Plus, it was one meal they wouldn't have to 'prepare'. He made his way to the cafeteria, explaining the situation and handing the backpack containing the chilled lunch box to the chefs. He waited there patiently with his hands in his pockets, his mind thinking over how this would go. If she did eat the food, that'd be a good step forward. But, there was still the problem at lunch, with the pill.

Taishi entered the cafeteria, trying to rub the sleep out of his eyes. He should be used to getting here so early, but he was just not made to get up along with the sun. He was early, since this was the only time his girlfriend could drop him off before she headed to work herself. As he was stifling a yawn, moving in the direction of his cart, which seemed to only have a couple of the meals prepared, he noticed Yoshiki. He was by all the 'chefs', though it was a little kind to give them those titles. There was no reason he could think of why he would be over there, so curiosity won out and he approached. "Hey, Kishinuma. What's going on?" he asked with a curious look at one of the chefs going over... a lunch box?

Yoshiki glanced away from the chefs, noticing the guy from yesterday. He was really getting familiar with him, huh? It was frustrating that he still couldn't put a name to his face, but it always felt out of place to ask. He looked back at the chefs, keeping his hands in his pockets. "Since Shinozaki won't eat, I figured I'd try and change that a little," he said, giving his senior the general idea. He'd probably think he was crazy himself, but he didn't particularly care.

Taishi blinked, his explanation serving to only confuse him more. "H...huh? You know... that's not apart of our job, right?" he asked hesitantly. He wouldn't deny it was nice, but feeding another person three meals a day would get expensive. Even if the meals were only 500 yen apiece, that would be 1500 yen a day... everyday of the week, if he plans on stopping by here on his off days... Yeah, it would be a lot. He hoped Koga or someone didn't lie him into this just to show him up or something. After all, all they were supposed to do was deliver the food. What was being fed was on the chefs' shoulders, and whether or not the patient ate was their choice.

Yoshiki nodded, be he didn't act like his action was all that weird. He should probably get used to other guards or any of the other staff thinking he was weird or telling him he wouldn't keep it up."Yeah," he answered, but didn't give his co-worker anything else to work off of. He didn't want to make it out to be a big deal, mostly because he didn't want to gain the attention of the more annoying guards.

Taishi rubbed the back of his head thoughtfully. It was nicer than anything he would ever do... Then again, he was a bit of a penny pitcher. Well, he wouldn't make too big a deal of it. It was Yoshiki's choice what to do with his money, and Ayumi would probably be better off with food that didn't look suspiciously like dog food. "You're a better man than me," he said as he glanced at the food he had bought her. "I just hope for your sake Koga doesn't find out about this..." he said in a quieter voice, even though Koga was always late to getting his breakfast out.

Yoshiki doubted that he was better than most of the average guards here. The only reason he was doing this was because he felt he had to make up for being a nuisance to others. He grimaced at the mention of Koga, hoping he wouldn't find out, but he probably would. He seemed to dislike him more than other people. "He probably will... In school, he always tried to find ways to give me a hard time," he said with a sigh, his eyes staying on the box as the chefs continued on checking it.

Taishi moved his hands into his pocket as he slouched against a wall. Ah, right, Kishinuma and Koga had been schoolmates. "Geeze, what did you do to get on his bad side?" he asked, assuming something had to have gone down to have Koga specifically target Yoshiki. While he was generally an asshole to anyone who wasn't in his inner circle, he wondered if his attention was going to be refocused to his old schoolmate.

Yoshiki shrugged, not certain on the exact reasoning. "Uh, it's hard telling... It might be because we were sort of similar in terms of the title 'slacker', but I wasn't part of his little band of misfits. I guess he was agitated that I didn't want anything to do with him," he guessed, since that was the only thing the two really had ever been grouped together with. They didn't really ever talk or get into a fight, so it couldn't have been anything like that.

Taishi chuckled lightly at the explanation. "That's petty enough that I wouldn't be surprised if Koga targets you 'cause of that," he remarked in amusement, even if the entire situation wasn't overly so. Koga was a remarkably pathetic person, though. To target someone because of something like that was silly.

"Taishi, yer carts prepared. Go feed the lunatics, will ya?" one of the chefs snapped at him as he observed the two guards having a casual conversation.

"Sure, sure," Taishi replied, not irritated by the sudden imposing. He did have a job to do. "See ya later, Kishinuma," he said in farewell as he headed off to get his cart and proceed with his daily duties.

Yoshiki nodded to Taishi as he felt. Well, now he could finally call him something in his head, but names would probably have to be kept out. He didn't want to say a senior's first name after just meeting him. He waited until the chefs gave him the okay. On Ayumi's tray, they put the cup of normal produce, and he added his own piece of breakfast in place of the normal slop. He hoped she wasn't just being difficult for the hell of it... He found that he really wanted to be able to make some sort of difference.

He went through the other patients, which went through a lot faster without the pills, like dinner did. He was to Ayumi pretty quickly. He slid the tray through, though made no special alert.

Ayumi sat on her bed, her back up against the wall of her room. She blinked tiredly, since sleep in this place was difficult to fall into. The bed wasn't comfortable, the ventilation system made everything cold, the blankets were too thin, but the worse thing was her noisy neighbors. The sounds of a psych ward were maddening, especially at night. Her eyes shifted in alertness at the sound of the tray. It was probably the new guard, which meant she'd be dealing with the same song and dance as yesterday. He seemed to be particularly stubborn, standing around for hours as if that would convince her to do as he wanted. She pushed off the bed, moving over to pluck off the food she would actually want from the tray. As she looked over the dish to decide what part to grab, her mind fully jolted awake at the sight of actually normal food. "H-huh?" she gasped in confusion. She's been in this place for... four or five years... She's never seen a meal like this before. "What's going on?" she voiced her confusion with a look of suspicion at the food.

Yoshiki wasn't sure what to do when she questioned the meal. He didn't want to make a big deal out of it at all... He actually didn't want to say he had anything to do with it. He didn't know why, he just... didn't want her to know. Also, there was the issue of other guards, namely Koga... He couldn't even imagine the obstacles he'd be faced with if Koga found out. "I don't know, I'm just in charge of bringing it," he told her, though it was a complete lie.

Ayumi stared at the food, the temptation very great to finally taste something that didn't have to be forced down. Though... this was too weird... She was nervous about going ahead and eating it, despite how much she wanted to. It was also weird how this was the day after this guy got started, when she's had years of unending gruel. She wasn't so sure she trusted his claim he just brought it. He had to have had some influence, considering how determined he seemed to get her to eat yesterday. "I doubt that... Did you drug this or something?" she asked sharply, not wanting to be tricked into taking her medicine.

Yoshiki sighed, a hand slipping through his hair. Even with good food, she was difficult to handle. Though, with someone so insistent on not taking the medicine, it should be obvious that she would have been suspicious. "Of course not," he said with a tired tone, his eyes coming back to hers and his hand returning to his side. As he had expected, the food had not been cheap, so he'd be very deflated if she ended up not accepting it under false suspicions.

Ayumi looked at him with a furrowed brow as she tried to figure out this guy's deal. He was behaving differently than the other guards she had dealt with, which threw her off enough. Now, her meal plan had changed? After years of consistency, she wasn't sure she could deal with this sudden shift. "Then why after years of being served the normal cafeteria food am I getting this?" she asked again, since he must know something about the change if he was willing to claim the food wasn't drugged.

Yoshiki hated being questioned, and with a suspicious girl like this, he wasn't sure he could keep up his ignorant charade. But, he wasn't giving up yet. He felt like... he'd feel better if he didn't get the credit for it, strangely. "I told you I don't know," he insisted with a small shake of his head, though he felt that wouldn't satisfy her, and first and foremost, he wanted her to eat.

Ayumi was quickly becoming frustrated with the apparently clueless boy. He knew the food wasn't drugged, but somehow he had no idea where there was such a drastic change in her diet? Should she even trust anything he says? But... it was the best quality food she's had the chance to eat in what felt like forever. It actually smelled good. She'd just... chew carefully... If there were any pills hidden in it, she'd be careful not to swallow them. Though, was that a good idea? She didn't want to be drugged. When her mind wasn't sharp, they got in easier. Of course, Nakano always told her that wasn't the case, but Ayumi knew her own mind... She chewed nervously at her lower lip as she glared at the food. Her walls felt like they were crumbling because the hunger pangs that plagued her stomach felt worse than usual. She huffed as she moved forward and took the tray. She was too tempted by the idea of having a full stomach without having to torture her taste buds.

Yoshiki seemed content when she finally took the tray. He was glad it hadn't taken any more persuasion or anything. He waited there for her to finish, so he could take the empty trays back to the cafeteria. Then, it'd be his first time actually doing some guard work. It was weird... Yesterday he had done nothing but deliver food and medication, when his job was called 'guard'.

Ayumi wanted to smack herself when she didn't have enough self-control to deny the food. She really hoped she didn't end up drugged later... Not that she'd be able to feel anger or much of anything at herself if that did end up being the case. Either way, at the moment, eating the rolled omelette was able to push that thought from her mind. She almost felt like crying, because she begun to forget that food could be good. It made her miss her mom's cooking, but she tried to derail her mind off that track, because she didn't want to spiral into any sort of depression. It was such an odd feeling when she hit the point where her stomach didn't hurt. She was actually full... She normally just survived off side dishes that she could stomach, until she ended up in bad enough condition that they had to knock her out and attach her to a feeding tube. Once done eating, she slid the tray back out and returned to her bed. Now that she had eaten the meal, her mind moved back to the question of why the hell the menu had changed after all this time.

Yoshiki watched as she at it all, rather quickly. It was pretty fulfilling to watch her enjoy it so much. He watched the tray slide back, and he grabbed it quietly. He slid it closer to the end, glancing up through the window. He smiled slightly before turning away, putting the tray with the other and making his way back to the cafeteria. Good... Breakfast and dinner would probably go pretty smoothly. Lunch, though? Not so much... He was sort of dreading it.

Ayumi was concerned about the sudden meal change... She should have bugged the guard about it more, she just didn't have the ability to pass on a good meal after the years of disgusting slop. Her eyes moved onto the guard as he went to take the tray, and she noticed a faint smile. She tilted her head and narrowed her eyes as she tried to figure out why, since he certainly didn't look like the type that would smile often for no reason. He must know something about the meal change... but did that mean he was supplying it? Why would he waste money on her, though? She leaned back against the wall with a thoughtful frown. She was going to have to push harder at lunch about all of this.

Yoshiki returned the trays to the cafeteria, the movement already being worked into a routine. Once everything was like this, it'd probably all blend together in his head. Well, except anything to do with the patients, since they were practically unpredictable. He actually got in some patrol time before lunch rolled around, though it came faster since he was dreading that whole pill business with Ayumi. Maybe he could figure out why, since that's what he had done with the food... Though he could guess it was because she didn't trust them... Well, he certainly couldn't blame her.

He made his rounds for lunch, eventually making it back to Ayumi's room. He slid the tray through, folding his arms over the small counter as a more relaxing way of blocking her from pushing it back without finishing off everything.

Ayumi was off in her own head, since she was never given anyway to spend her time. All she could ever do was stare at the ceiling and try to escape mentally. If she wasn't crazy before this place, it was certainly making her edge closer to the instability. She sat up when she heard lunch come up, reacting like a dog when hearing a can opener. It was dehumanizing, but that was the point, wasn't it? She examined the guard cautiously as she approached the tray. Once again, it wasn't the normal cafeteria offerings. "Seriously, where are these meals coming from? I know the kitchen wouldn't fix this up," she asked him again. She still believed he must know something, so she would just have to be pushier this time.

Yoshiki glanced up at her, giving another shrug as an answer, though if she was still persisting, he wasn't so sure he could keep his walls up. He guessed it was pretty suspicious, what with the meals changing a day after he started... In hindsight, trying to hide it was doomed to fail at the start. He had just been reluctant to speak up, because of several reasons. But he felt he'd have to crack under the pressure of being asked things he couldn't really answer, or at least, shouldn't be able to.

Ayumi let out an annoyed huff of a sigh as his shoulders moved to shrug off her question. He was playing oblivious, and maybe he actually was, but she couldn't easily believe that. "Fine! If you don't know, go find me someone who does! Go get Ms. Nakano!" Ayumi snapped, figuring he'd either fess up to what he knew, or Nakano could tell her. Even if she couldn't stand talking to that woman, Ayumi had to know what was going on. If this new guard had nothing to do with it, someone had to have gone out of their way. It's just... no one would. So, she was lost on what was going on, and she hated that feeling.

Yoshiki's look flattened, reluctant to go speak to the woman again. He'd probably get in trouble for wasting her time, and he didn't want to make a scene of it. "Ugh, alright, it's from me... Why do you care so much?" he asked her with a slightly annoyed tone, after his eyes had glanced around to make sure Koga wasn't around.

Even if Ayumi had considered the idea that the guard may be supplying her food, she hadn't been overly willing to accept that as a very likely thing. Her hostility mellowed down to just confusion. "I wanted to know where it was coming from," she answered, figuring it was pretty obvious. Hah, for a moment she thought her parents may be extending an arm back towards her, but that would never be the case. "Why are you bothering to feed me?"she then asked, glancing between the untouched lunch and the guard. He was here to make money... not waste it on a hopeless patient such as herself.

Yoshiki wasn't very pleased with the straight forward answer, but it seemed like that was just the way they talked to each other. He was getting a little tired of being asked that question, but at least by now, the answer was pretty much easily just droned out. "Well, it's a little hard to watch someone eat so poorly, and I doubt you want to be forced on tubes," he told her, since he didn't feel like telling her the more personal answer. After all, it isn't like he wanted to get attached to her. That would no doubt lead to disaster.

Ayumi tilted her head as she gave the guard a strange look. If he took a good look around this place, it wasn't like she was the only one eating poorly. Hell, even those who ate the cafeteria's meals weren't in the best of shape. It wasn't like he could feed this entire place..."I've been on them before... I'll probably end up on them again. You don't have to go and make me your charity case," she said, unsure how to react to any sort of kindness at this point. Surely the meals would eventually go back to the cafeteria slop when he realized how much money he was wasting on her... She was still hung up on the fact he even cared. The guards kept themselves distant from everything happening, at least, that's what they were supposed to do.

Yoshiki didn't care to further defend his reasoning, or whatever. She could either take it or leave. He guessed he couldn't force it on her, if she was having such a problem understanding. "Just eat it already. Why doesn't matter... Geez, even when you're sort of cooperative, you're still hard to deal with," he mentioned with a small tired sigh.

Ayumi glared at him, emotions turning inside of her. She didn't know what to do with this situation. He was doing a nice thing, but he seemed like sort of a jerk. Which left her torn on ignoring the food or accepting the offer. She looked at the sushi, a meal she hadn't had in years, and found herself once against giving in to her taste buds. He'd probably give up on trying to feed her at some point, considering the expense... She'll take advantage of the situation in front of her while she could. It was a little weird having two full meals in a day. Her stomach wasn't used to it, so she had to eat slowly. She didn't want to end up puking, since it was always such a pain when they had to clean this room.

Once done, she put the tray back up. Most of the food was gone, but the pills sat untouched in the little plastic cup.

Yoshiki watched her eat, while occasionally glancing down the hall for any sign of other guards. He didn't want this to spread particularly... He'd like to deal with Koga as little as humanly possible. When he heard the tray clank against the metal platform, his eyes were drawn to the pills. He had expected this. He stared a moment, figuring he should go ahead and see what the root problem was, rather than waste his time trying to demand that she take them. "Why... exactly are you so against taking them?" he asked, his eyes coming back up to her. Normally it wouldn't be so strange, but she was adamant about not taking them like a sane person. Stubborn, but with a cool head about the whole thing. She wasn't shouting about the doctors doing weird things to her or anything... So it had him kind of puzzled. He was interested to hear what her reasoning was.

Ayumi looked at the guard with a raised eyebrow. He was shifting his approach to her, it seemed. Not that it mattered. While he was able to get her to eat, no one could possibly convince her to take those pills. "Because I don't need them," she said with a leveled tone. She wasn't like the others in here, she knew that. She wasn't going to be talked into believing she was insane or psychopathic. "If anything, they make everything worse," she added with a hiss. She didn't know why she was telling him... Probably because there was no reason not to. He'd end up thinking she was crazy like all the others did, once they saw her taken over.

Yoshiki listened to her, considering the idea. Well, it's not like psychiatrists were unable to make mistakes... but why else would she be here? She had to have done something to end her up here... But, he knew so little about her, or hardly anything, so he couldn't make judgments. Still, he wanted to dig a bit deeper. "So... you say you're not ill? Then what ended you up here?" he asked, since it seemed the only way to get some insight. Koga did say she was one that you weren't sure was insane, but it wasn't like he had ever listened to Koga before. He'd like to hear her genuine side of the story first.

Ayumi frowned as she sat back onto her bed, her eyes still watching the guard as he tried to dig deeper. Why did he even care? Why she was in here... It shouldn't matter to him. All he was supposed to do was deliver food and medicine. Now, here he was... paying for meals and asking about her past. She let out a heavy sigh as she looked up thoughtfully. "I'm not ill... but I'm not particularly well, either," she said, realizing she was talking in circles. She could feel their presence weighing down on her mind in this place. So many people died in these walls. She looked back to him with a dark expression. "Before I tell you anything, I need to ask you something... Do you believe in ghosts?"

Yoshiki stared at her a moment, not sure how to respond. Honestly... no... But, he guessed he didn't think it was _impossible_. He just found it... unlikely. It was partly due to the fact he had never had one of those experiences that other people claim to have, but... He'd listen to what she had to say. He gave a small shrug, his eyes casually glancing to the side. "Not really... but I'll still listen to your story," he told her, since he didn't think the idea was unfathomable. He just couldn't say he'd bet his life on it. With some cases, seeing is believing. Ghosts were one of those. However, he'd still listen to her with an open mind, since she really didn't seem all that crazy.

Ayumi frowned lightly, but she had been expecting that answer. Most people didn't believe in ghosts, which is why she was here. She sighed, unsure if she wanted to bother telling him this story, knowing in the end he'd just label her as 'crazy.' "I don't see the point, but fine. It's not like I have anything else to do," she admitted, aware he was going to find little value in what she said. "I was thirteen when the first incident occurred. It was a normal day at school, but when I got there... I began to feel off. I didn't think it was anything but a headache, so I pushed forward with the day. During class, I kept hearing a whispering in my ear... I couldn't understand what was being said, but it distracted me enough from class that I was beginning to get frustrated. The teacher noticed me and sent me off to the nurse. She told me it must have been my classmates whispering to each other, and I should just tell them to shush when I got back to class. So, I figured she was right and went along with my day. I remember getting to class, settling down for the lesson, but that's it. Next memory is at home. My mother was sobbing in the other room and my dad was using a tone of voice he used whenever someone died..."she recalled with a frown. She hadn't told this story in a while, but it always managed to push at barely healed wounds. "Apparently, I had lost it. They told me I had been screaming... having a fit in the middle of class. They told me that I had grabbed my chair and attacked a classmate with it... I was pulled from school. My parents figured homeschooling me would help. It did... for a little bit. Then I went at my mother with a pair of scissors, apparently. Well, I guess that was the last straw to them. They dumped me off at this place, thinking they'd be able to fix me. I was first a C patient... then I was moved to B... My... 'episodes' became worse and I had them more often. Those so-called fits I had were nothing of my own volition. But, no one believes me. Bi-polar, schizophrenic, dissociative identity disorder, major depressive disorder... They keep trying to diagnose me with those diseases because they refuse to believe that there's something more to this than a chemical imbalance. So, all the medicine they put me on... It'll never help. It numbs me and dulls me... It turns me into the perfect empty vessel for them to do whatever they want with me," she was ranting at this point, burning off some of the frustrations that built up over years of being treated for things she knew she didn't have. She snapped back to where she was, as she had forgotten Yoshiki's presence for a brief moment.

Yoshiki's eyes were slowly drawn back to her as she went on telling her story. Though it was becoming more of a little rant at the end, it was a pretty troubling tale. He wasn't sure what to make of it... But, honestly... he may believe it... more so than her actually being crazy. Just... her demeanor, the way she talked, all seemed completely normal... Well, for now. If she was kept her for however long, she'd probably start to become crazy for real. But, if she was sick, it may be best to keep her in here... Ugh, he hated being at a moral crossroads like this. It didn't happen often, bu he was always nervous of making the wrong choice. "I... see," he said slowly, his eyes looking toward the ground thoughtfully. "A question, though... If there are ghosts, and you can't keep them from controlling you, do you think... you _should_ be in here?" he asked her as his eyes came back to her, as he wanted to see her own moral standing. Of course it was bad in here... But even if she was telling the truth, it didn't eliminate the danger she posed to those around her. He'd like to see... what she thought.

Ayumi's eyes hardened at the question, something about hearing it aloud put a lump in her throat. She let out a small, bitter laugh. "I've never said anything about getting out, have I? I just don't want to be on their medicine..." she admitted, gut twisting at the weight of an entire lifetime in this place. "When I was younger, if my parents had tried to understand... there's means of keeping ghosts out. Mediums make a job of it. But, I think it's too late for me to be able to control this... Besides, it isn't like they'll even let me try," she said with a small shrug. Nakano always said she wouldn't play into Ayumi's fantasies... that it would be enabling her to give her those books on psychics and ghosts. Ayumi doubted her ability to master it to the point she'd be able to live among the general population, but it would be nice have some control.

Yoshiki glanced away again, feeling a small pang of pity. He didn't want to do anything beyond this whole food deal... He was afraid he'd actually start to feel like he was responsible for her... He'd wait and see... and think on what he'd do. He felt this would take a large deal of sorting through. "I guess that's true...," he mentioned with a slightly more solemn tone, though he quickly returned to his blank expression. "Well... don't take it if you want, but... after a few times, they'll probably get people to force it on you," he told her, even though he was aware that she had probably already gone through such a process, maybe even multiple times. His hand reached through slightly, pulling the tray back over and placing it with the rest.

Ayumi didn't like knowing he was pitying her. That's probably what the entire food thing was about. She was in a normal state of mind when not possessed, and he probably could read that. So, he pitied her, and to feel better, he seemed to be feeding her. As irritating as it could be, she'd take the meals while she could. She looked at him, considering the fact he was backing down on insisting she take her pills. "They won't if you get rid of the pills," she noted with a neutral tone. She was pretty sure that was what the last guy did. Weeks of not taking medication without having the rougher guards come in... the previous guard had to have flushed the pills or threw them away. Hell, maybe he sold them. Either way, it was less trouble for both of them. Maybe she could use this guy's pity towards her to keep the process going.

Yoshiki was in the process of stacking the trays when he heard a suggestion from Ayumi. He gave her a half smile, his eyes narrowed. "Sorry, I'm not that kind of worker. Even if you aren't sick, I can't help you concerning breaking the rules. Your past guard probably did that, but don't expect it from me," he told her, then turned his head back and began wheeling the cart back to the cafeteria. If he decided to, he'd find other ways to help her... but he wasn't going to be dishonest and just get rid of her pills. Of course he felt a little bad, since he didn't want the rougher guards coming in, but there was little he could do about that while still keeping his work ethics in tact.

Ayumi frowned at his direct rejection to her suggestion. She guessed she shouldn't be surprised, since he seemed like a by-the-books type guard, which was frustrating in its own way. She somewhat missed her old, lazy guard that didn't bother her with questions or throw curve balls her way. She watched as he went off, her stomach churning as she realized she was going to be back on her medicine really soon. Which meant her visitors will be coming around more frequently. Once this guard saw her in her turned state, she doubted he'd keep wasting money to get her to buy meals. She sighed, the powerlessness of it all was once again making itself apparent. She had no control whatsoever.


	3. Chapter 3

Yoshiki still had an internal conflict in his head as he wheeled down the cart for dinner. He felt like this was majority of his job... Even though group A was worse, he had a feeling guards in at least group B actually had more guard duty, since the patients were allowed to mingle with one another. With all of these people in tight locked doors, it would probably be extremely rare that he ever did what he had been anticipating this job to be.

He got to Ayumi's door and slid the last tray of the day in, and the meal was different than the slop, like the others. He was still trying to keep it on the down low though, so he was hoping it'd no longer be a point of interest in their conversations.

Ayumi glanced at the food on the tray, still feeling that sharp jolt of surprise that it wasn't from the cafeteria. While a part of her told herself that she should just deny the food, she couldn't see herself doing that. Her pride wasn't that great, and she didn't anticipate these chances always presenting themselves. So, she'd drop any fusses over the food, and just accept it. "So... Guard, I was kind enough to share my woeful journey into this hell. I was wondering if you'd be willing to grant me the same courtesy?" she inquired as she grabbed her dinner. She figured something had to have gone wrong in his life to end him up here... But, even if he did have a crappy life, he was still different than the other guards she's seen before. There was a mix of boredom and curiosity pushing her to even bother him with the question.

Yoshiki was starting to think this would be silent dinner, the first time they hadn't talked for a meal. He had thought they'd have nothing more to talk about, but it turned out he was wrong. He didn't really want to go in depth about all this... After all, they really shouldn't know so much about each other. Also, it was... a bit weird to be called 'guard', but he wasn't going to get on a name basis with her, so he left it as is. "It's not as interesting as you might think. I just dropped out my first year in high school, had a part time job, and eventually got upgraded. I know this place is pretty bad, but by a paying standard, it's the best place I could possibly be," he told her with a slightly flat tone, his arms crossed over his chest.

Ayumi took her food over to her bed, since the small square of her room didn't have a desk or table. She listened to him, a small frown on her face as he explained his situation. She couldn't imagine willingly placing herself near this place, but then again, she only knew it as a patient. "Why do all you boys drop out of high school?" she challenged with a disapproving look. She would kill to be in school. She missed learning so much... She missed having the goal of education and the friends to spend time with. She was rotting in this place. Meanwhile, he had the chance and tossed it aside? It was beyond frustrating to know so many of the guards were drop-outs.

Yoshiki's eyes narrowed slightly, but he didn't want to go further into detail. He still didn't liked being pushed in a big group of drop outs, though... "You're talking like we all have the same reasons," he told her flatly, not liking being lumped together with Koga. It was also a little rude to assume they were all the same. Everyone had their own reasons for doing things... Some were more petty than others, while others were pretty justified reasons. He was probably more on the petty side from spectators' points of view, but he still didn't appreciate it.

Ayumi chewed her meal slowly, still adjusting to the feeling of a full stomach. She had to remind herself that she shouldn't get too comfortable with it, though. He'd mostly likely give up as it continued being a nuisance. At his reply, she had to admit that the guards were in many ways the same person to her. There may be varying degrees of fear or violence from them, but they all blurred into the same person. "Is your reason so much different than theirs?" she questioned, wondering if he had a legitimate reason to leave school. Most of the time, it was unruly kids unable to handle the discipline, or slackers who refused to take part in learning.

Yoshiki glanced away from her for a small moment, his frown increasing ever so slightly. He took a small moment to decide what his answer would be, but ultimately settled on standing his ground. Not that they were in danger of it, but he didn't want to end up her friend or anything. "How should I know what their reasoning was, to know that I'm so different? I'm just saying we're not all the same, so don't just lump us together," he told her with a slightly agitated tone, but it was mostly due to his knowledge that Koga was a drop out too.

Ayumi guessed she was hitting a sore spot with this, because she could tell he was beginning to get annoyed by her. He could just walk away at any point, though. He didn't have to stand around and watch her finish off her meal. She'd scoff at him for his annoyance being compared to the other guards, but she couldn't deny he has proven himself to be an... oddity. Guards didn't stick around to talk to her, and they certainly never put money out for their patients. "Fine, fine... Sorry," she mumbled before she took another bite. She felt a tinge bad, so she figured the best thing she could do is apologize and be quiet. He didn't seem interested in sharing, anyways.

Yoshiki was a little surprised by the apology. His agitation deflated quickly, since there was no longer a reason to be angry with her. He glanced to the side, leaning onto the palm of his hand. "...It's alright," he muttered with a small sigh, letting a silence develop. Though they weren't talking, he couldn't really tear himself away. He guessed it was because it was easier to just collect the tray after she was done, rather than coming back later. Besides, it wasn't like he had anything else to do. No prisoner had gotten out, and none of his patients were acting up.

Ayumi frowned lightly, wondering to herself why she even bothered trying to ask him those questions. It was easy to fall back on the assumption she was just bored, but that couldn't be it. She was actually curious about this weird guy... but he seemed unwilling to go into much detail on himself. Her questions ended up deflected into a general answer, instead of talking about himself. She had more questions, but she doubted that he would answer them... She couldn't stand the silence as she chewed her food, though. "What high school did you drop out of?" she asked, because it was one of the few questions in her mind that didn't ask for some personal detail.

Yoshiki was okay in the silence, but was thankful she spoke up again. He was used to being alone and such, but waiting with nothing to do was making time inch by painfully slow. "Kisaragi," he answered, short but it contained the information she asked for. He doubted she knew it though... No one knew high school names besides the one they attend.

Ayumi was expecting a generic high school name that wouldn't ring any bells, but the name managed to alert her. A small breath of laughter escaped her at the oddness of it. "That's the school I was planning to attend..." she said with a thoughtful sadness, eyes looking down at her food. She had been a forward thinking middle schooler, who had been extremely excited about high school. She had eagerly researched nearby high schools in debate of which one she wanted to join. There had been a couple others she had considered, but Kisaragi was the one that made the most sense and was her top choice.

Yoshiki found his attention was back on her at her reply. It sort of made him regret his answer, though she had asked for it. He looked down, feeling a sort of solemn mood resurface. How weird... that they would've attended the same school. Not that they would've associated with each other. They were pretty much opposites, or so it seemed from what little he knew about her. Still... to be that close in relation to location, and the fact she had planned out her future only to have it wrecked... It made him feel like he was getting too wrapped up in all this, and he definitely didn't like it.

Ayumi looked at the guard, his eyes focused on the ground. She wondered if they would have even crossed paths... She wasn't sure if the years would match up, but still, it was funny how life worked out. "Well, now I'm even surer that you're an idiot for dropping out of school," Ayumi mentioned with a scornful edge to her tone. She was prepared for him to get irritated about that comment, but she could stand behind the idea of dropping out being stupid. It would have been one thing if he had been at a poor school that wasn't actually teaching... but Kisaragi had good rankings among the district.

Yoshiki remained quiet, his expression nor position changing at her words. Of course he was... he didn't need everyone to tell him that constantly. He was stupid and useless, but he wished he could get away from everyone telling him so.

Ayumi's expression flickered into uncertainty at the lack of a response. She guessed she didn't realize how badly she had become at trying to have a conversation with someone. She frowned, finding herself unable to eat the last bites of her food. Dammit, now she felt bad... really bad. Worse than when she had compared him to the other guards. She didn't even know why. It isn't like he would care about her opinion on him. She moved off her bed and approached the door with the tray in hand. "Ugh, listen, what I'm trying to get to is... Just go back to school. Get out of this hellhole while you still have the chance in front of you. This place... no one can grow in it. The little bit of money you're making isn't worth what you'll end up losing if you stay here," she said firmly before pushing the tray out to him to take.

Yoshiki only glanced up when he heard her walking forward, though his eyes instead followed the tray as it was slid onto his side. Her advice didn't do anything for him, since he knew nothing would come from going back. He took the tray, eyes still on it. "There's no reason for me to. Nothing would come from it," he told her as he put the tray with the others, as per routine. He moved to push the cart, staring dead ahead. "See you tomorrow," he said, just because it felt rude to just cut off the conversation so uncleanly. He pushed the cart forward, back to the cafeteria.

Ayumi flinched lightly at his reply and exit, a little stunned, but mostly unhappy about how that entire exchange happened. Which was a stupid feeling to have, because it wasn't like she could make a friend of him. Just because he was paying for meals for her... She bit against her left cheek in annoyance and went to collapse on her bed. He wasn't feeding her because he cared about her. Why he was even bothering made no sense, and he wasn't willing to give her a real explanation. Why the hell did she bother to tell him her story? Ugh, she regretted everything about today.

* * *

Koga was dropping off his group's empty trays when he noticed Yoshiki. He hadn't seen him since their little training session ended, but he had heard from some of his buddies what was going on. Besides the fact one of them had noticed Yoshiki backpacking and handing food to a chef, it was easy to notice on a cart full of gray and brown shaded slops of food that there was one dish that seemed better. Since each tray was labeled, it was easier to trace it back to Shinozaki. Tch, he had been kind enough to specifically warn Yoshiki about her, and here he was, buying her meals. Given his natural disdain for the uppity delinquent, he couldn't resist putting in his two cents. "'Ey, Kishinuma, are we going to have to start putting up 'please don't feed the animals' signs around here? What're you even feeding that psycho for?" Koga asked with a jeer.

Yoshiki was about to leave the cafeteria to head out for the day, but of course he was stopped by a voice he hated. Reluctantly, he turned towards Koga, though his expression wasn't very amused. A small heat rose in his stomach at him using the term 'animal', but he always tried not to give Koga the satisfaction of setting him off. "Actually, Ms. Nakano gave me permission. And, she's not an animal. None of them are," he said, his eyes slightly narrowing. "Besides, it's none of your business in the first place. I don't see why you concern yourself so much with my life instead of paying attention to your own," _or lack thereof_.

Koga smirked at his reply, untroubled by his reply. He didn't really care what Yoshiki did or didn't do, but if he had the chance to try and piss him off, he'd take it. It wasn't like he was losing his entire day to talking to him. "Ha, Ms. Nakano is probably only letting you do it because it would be interesting to see what Shinozaki would do. She's observing her behavior... as one would watch an animal," he remarked as he refused to let up on the animal metaphor. After all, if he went out of his way to try and correct him calling them that, it had to bother him a little."Though, maybe calling them animals is too generous. At least animals have a purpose. They're all just a bunch of halfwits with malfunctioning brains," he added in false thoughtfulness.

Yoshiki knew what Koga was trying to do, so he was trying to keep his head level, but it was a little difficult to do. He had a short fuse as it was... "She's not a halfwit. If you weren't so ignorant, maybe you'd be able to tell," he shot back, though tried to keep his voice level. Other than tone control, he hadn't really thought about defending her, per say. While she wasn't an animal, she was just a patient on his list... He didn't have to act like she was a friend he had to defend. Even if she wasn't crazy, and didn't belong here, he shouldn't care so much as to bother doing the pointless back and forth with Koga for her...

Koga was finding it very amusing Yoshiki was even standing around to talk back to him. It was the most of a reaction he had ever gotten from him, so he couldn't ignore it. "She's a good little actress, I'd give her that. But she's still a fucking lunatic. Just wait till you see one of her episodes. She's inhuman," Koga said, sincere in his words. He has seen her violent episodes, and when she got like that she was easily one of the worse patients in this place. She became a rabid animal, actually. "Do us all a favor and stop feeding her. You'll only prolong her useless life." Another comment that he really meant. He didn't understand why people or the government paid to house these crazies. Like that Kizami guy shouldn't be kept around. It didn't make any sense to keep a violent danger to society alive.

Yoshiki found his anger escalating, but he tried not to let Koga get anything else out of him. Well, now he certainly wasn't stopping, since he never wanted to do Koga a favor. Or anyone else that thought that way for that matter. To spare himself the frustration and giving Koga anything else, he chose that moment to turn and just leave. Though, even after he left the Asylum, he was confused on why he even cared. Ayumi wasn't crazy... but... she was a patient, right? That title made him think and act differently, but should it? Maybe... He didn't want to be her friend, since group A was forever doomed to be here... Hah, not that he was in particular danger of that. He had a way of offending people, and scaring them away from being anything close to a 'friend'. But still... he didn't want the chance of it happening...

On the other hand, he really did disagree with Koga, which meant... she wasn't like the other patients. That didn't make it okay for them to keep learning more about each other though, did it? He'd like to keep thinking on it, but by his own involuntary actions, he was guessing his mind had already made itself up. Ugh, why couldn't he just work a simple job with good pay? Why did hell storms follow him everywhere?

* * *

Ayumi was slumped into a ball on her bed, watching the window of her cell's door with tired eyes. She was still frustrated by her lack of understanding of the weird guard, and why she even cared if he shut down any conversation she tried. Maybe because the guards she's previously had never even acknowledged her existence. They rarely cared to make sure she ate or took her pills. The ones who did only reported it to the higher ups, who got people to force her on such things. Either way, this guy was throwing her for a loop, and it was pissing her off. She had grown used to the predicable behavior of the guards... Although, he'd probably end up falling into that behavior too. Even if he was an oddity now... this place would eat him alive.

Yoshiki was still mulling over what he was doing as he wheeled through the cart for breakfast. He could still chicken out, but... it probably wouldn't be that easy. Defending her was just... even more needless trouble, that there had to be a reason for. When he was nearing her door, he had to urge himself forward a little, since he was still sort hesitant over it. When he finally moved himself toward her door, and slid the tray through, he had to fight a little for his voice. He leaned against the platform, glancing to the side as he felt a bit agitated at himself. "It's... Yoshiki... So you don't have to call me 'guard' all the time," he muttered, eyes still adverted to the side.

Ayumi uncurled herself from the ball she was sitting in when she heard the tray. She noted that he was still buying her meals for whatever reason. She had assumed this would be a silent affair from here on out, so his voice snapped her aware. She stared at him, brain lagging as he introduced himself. This guy was incredibly weird and hard to keep up with. Last time, it had felt like he didn't want any conversation directed about him. Now, he was giving her his name. Which, may not be a big deal if they were out in the normal world, but they weren't She was a patient, and he was guard, and guards never bothered to give them their name. She couldn't recall any guard in the past years giving her his name... especially his personal name. "Oh, uh, okay," she stumbled, clearly thrown off by the granted information. She couldn't fall back on social cliches, because he already knew her name, and it also wasn't a great situation to say: 'nice to meet you.'

Yoshiki didn't say anything else. He had decided to talk more to her, as a normal person, but he wasn't very talkative as it was. After all, not many people took to him, so he was reluctant to start any conversation. Plus, adding on information from yesterday seemed so out of place, especially without her asking for it, or something like that... He was sort of giving himself an out, so if she didn't talk, he could just say he tried.

Ayumi was debating whether this name-basis thing was a sign of change or just another oddity of the guard... er, Yoshiki. She was a little nervous to test it, considering his attitude towards most of her questions yesterday. The worse thing that could happen is her irritating him enough that she'd be given normal cafeteria stuff again. Which would suck, but she's expecting that to come at any point. Her bored mind was willing to test and see if he wanted to talk a little more. It was just... she didn't have a conversation in mind. He already explained the name change, and the topics from last night felt like she should let it alone. Then again, the last thing he said to her left a bad taste in her mouth. She took the tray and took it over to her bed. She looked down at her food, her voice taking a moment to find. "Hey... last night... you said nothing would come from going back to school... Do you really think that?"

Yoshiki found himself enjoying the silence a little more, since he was still reluctant to share much else. Though, of course, things didn't really go the way he wanted. At least he didn't have to say much... really, he wasn't saying anything new. He had already told her this, she just needed confirmation they weren't empty words, for some reason. "Yeah," he answered, his eyes still to the side. _Most people do too._ She had already proved she didn't approve of drop outs, so he doubted they'd be getting close anytime soon, if at all.

Ayumi looked at him with an observant gaze, wondering what exactly brought someone to that conclusion. "But... school betters a person's life. Even with just a high school diploma, more doors open for you. Doors that lead to a better place than a mental asylum," she frowned at him with a furrowed brow. The term 'mental asylum' had actually fallen out of use in place of the politically correct 'psychiatric hospital.' Either way, it wasn't a great place to be. To let yourself get tied up in here for a paycheck that was decent for an uneducated person was silly to her. Although, she wasn't sure if he planned to keep this job for as long as possible, she guessed that would be the case unless a better one opened itself up to him.

Yoshiki gave a small shrug, though he guessed he should have explained better. It's not that a diploma wouldn't get him anywhere... He only wished he could get that far. "Who says I'd earn a degree? You know, it's not just you. A lot of others, including myself, know I'm stupid. For me, school is a waste of time, and money that I really need. A part time job just doesn't cut it," he told her, after a little bit of hesitation. He wasn't trying to make her feel sorry for him. He didn't want anybody's pity or lectures, but he had promised himself he'd tell her the things she wanted to know.

Ayumi felt a pang in her chest when she realized that she had crossed a line by calling him an idiot last night. So, he had trouble in school with the actual education part... It was odd to realize how obvious that detail probably should have been. She had basically guessed he was a slacker, but it seemed to come down to the time put into school that may end up not resulting in any sort of diploma. "I... I shouldn't have called you an idiot. I really don't think that you are one... It's just sort of frustrating to see someone give up an education," she apologized vaguely, averting her eyes. Though, something in all of this suddenly struck her as odd. "Your parents... they don't help you at all?" she asked, anticipating a bad answer like they disowned him or died.

Yoshiki didn't reply right off, though his eyes did finally come to her. Her apology didn't mean much, since he knew he was one. She didn't know him very well, not enough to know he really didn't contribute anything to those around him. His eyes narrowed very slightly, all of these questions just digging deeper into his background that he didn't particularly want to disclose. "... No, I live by myself, without any help," he answered, though he didn't sound too solemn about it.

Ayumi felt a chill when his eyes settled on her, and she had to look away to the white walls of her room. She frowned lightly at his answer, wondering if she was trying to dig too much up. Even if he didn't sound particularly upset, she figured she should pull the reigns back. "Oh... sorry," she said, unsure of what she was apologizing for exactly, but it felt like the suitable thing to say. She turned her attention back squarely on her food, even if her appetite wasn't as prominent as yesterday, she would feel bad not eating most of it. Living on his own must be expensive, along with the costs of feeding, clothing, and anything life entails. She frowned, suddenly feeling guilty about getting anything from him. "You know... you really don't have to keep buying me meals. I was fine before... Not that this isn't nice, but it's kinda unnecessary when the cafeteria is willing to feed me," she told him, only glancing at him for a moment before looking down.

Yoshiki was a little confused by her next apology. Exactly what was she saying sorry for? It wasn't anything he was upset about. He more accepted being by himself. What she said afterword rubbed him the wrong way a little, since he had the idea it was coming from unwanted pity. "They may be 'willing' to feed you, but you made a pretty big deal out of not letting them," he mentioned, since that's sort of where all this started. Besides, he wouldn't stop anyways... even if it was making money a little tight. That'd only last until his first paycheck, which would be immensely better than what his music store job paid. It just... made him feel useful, when she ate so heartily.

Ayumi couldn't deny that she did raise a fuss about what the cafeteria prepared, because the dishes were absolutely heinous. Though, why he was choosing to react in such a way as to waste money on her still made little sense. "I don't need to eat much or often. It isn't like I do anything, anyways. It's a waste of money, so please, just stop," she said with her eyes set on him. She wasn't worth the effort, especially if things were tight for him. Any extra money he has he should be tucking away. She appreciated he would even bother with her, but it ultimately wasn't worth it. She didn't need the energy or health that a good meal provided her.

Yoshiki had expected the way this was going. Great, now she felt bad for him... Which was unnecessary. He could take care of himself, no matter what. He had been for years. "I think that's my decision to make," he mentioned with slight agitation.

Ayumi's eyes narrowed, a fit of irritation coiled around her stomach. "I think if I ask you to stop buying me food, that maybe you should just respect that and stop," she snapped at him. She couldn't let the food waste if it was put in front of her, though. Knowing he had went out and spent money on her made it impossible. "I don't understand what your deal is! Why bother spending money on some mental case you don't even know!? Why bother talking to me and telling me your name!?" He was too confusing to deal with, and she didn't like it.

"Or you should respect my decision when it's my money, and stop pitying me when I don't want it," Yoshiki said back, his eyes narrowing as a building fire formed in his stomach. Though, he tried to calm down, since getting angry with her wouldn't solve much. This is what he got for answering her... More complaining and spur of the moment tiffs. But even though he was getting a little heated, he had to remember to speak calmly, since other guards and patients were around. He didn't want to attract the attention of Koga or guards like him, and he didn't want to possibly trigger another patient into flipping out. "Because... I...," his voice trailed off a small moment as he looked away, considering what he was going to say. He hated being forced into this... but now, he couldn't just back out without an answer. "I've never been a good thing to anyone."

Ayumi was about to snarl at him that his reason for feeding her came from the exact same feeling. He pitied her enough to spend money on her, and she pitied him enough that she didn't want to see him needlessly spend. She wasn't able to snap that out before he began to say something else. She looked at him through narrowed eyes, but once he got out his answer, her expression relaxed. She stared at him, stunned and thrown off. "W...what? You're doing this... so you'll be a good thing for me?" she asked in disbelief. How... weird. There were so many people out there that he could be a good thing to. So many people that could actually be a good thing back. Why the hell would he choose her for this?

Yoshiki frowned slightly, feeling a little embarrassed at the way she said it. It sounded weirder put that way... but he guessed it was ultimately the same thing. "Y... yes," he muttered, though felt a bit uncomfortable agreeing to the way she put it. It was right, and basically the same thing he had said, but adding in subjects made it sound so different.

Ayumi's eyes were glued on him, finding it hard to believe, but she had a feeling in her gut he wasn't lying. After all, it seemed like it would be an embarrassing thing to admit to. It was touching, even though she realized it was probably less about who she actually was, and more about what he had just said. He wanted to be something good in someone's life. "You're... odd," she mumbled as she moved off her bed and slipped the tray through the slot. "But thanks," she said with red cheeks. She was grateful that someone wanted to do something kind for her. Still, she worried that once he saw her out of her mind... well, he may not want to be anything to her.

Yoshiki looked at her as she moved from the bed, his expression somewhat surprised. That... seemed to have put an end to the fight, if one could call it that. He stared for a moment after she thanked him, taking in the sincerity in her eyes. A sort of elated feeling that was pretty unfamiliar to him began in his chest. He... rather liked being useful to at least one person. He glanced down at the tray, his hand grabbing the side and sliding it off the edge. A small, thoughtful smile appeared before he closed his eyes. "It's no problem," he said before turning, resuming the daily chore of returning the trays.

* * *

The sounds of key working the lock of her cell sent Ayumi into hostile alert. It was never a good thing for a guard to come into her cell. She knew this was going to happen at some point, since Yoshiki made it clear he wouldn't skirt by that part of his job. Although, she couldn't be angry about that. She didn't want him risking his job either at this point. The guard that entered was one that she had encountered before, but she had no idea what his name was. She just knew he was an asshole. Her eyes narrowed and muscles tightened. She was prepared to fight, even if the end result would undoubtedly be the same.

"Morning, Shinozaki. I take it you know why I'm here?" Koga asked with a smirk as he glared down at her. Even if she wasn't as overtly crazy as the other patients, when she did get to the point of madness, it was insane. They were lucky she hadn't been breaking out into fits with the lack of medication she's been on. Yoshiki wasn't very good at this job. Now Koga was in charge of making sure a patient that wasn't even his took her meds. Oh well, she was a tiny little thing. She couldn't hurt him if she wanted to.

"Piss off," Ayumi said in a low, menacing voice. She hated this guy and the others like him. They were bullies, but it became so much worse when one considered the people they were bullying.

Koga's amused smirk flickered as he glared down at her. Her little comment made him want to punch her upside the head, but he knew that would end poorly. "Last chance. Take your pills yourself or have me force them on you," he told her flatly. It was something he was obligated to tell the patient.

Ayumi didn't reply, instead she focused her glare onto him. Her lips pressed down tightly as she showed her refusal to bow down to this. She didn't want them back in her body. She didn't want to just be an empty vessel.

"You sure?" Koga asked as she took a couple steps closer. His eyebrow was raised in curiosity. She was certainly a stubborn one, which managed to piss Koga off even more. She should be grateful they were giving her drugs to fix her broken self.

Her eyes narrowed, dread forming in her stomach. Her head moved slightly in a nod. Before she had a moment to blink, Koga reached forward and grabbed the front of her shirt roughly. He pulled her off the bed, onto the floor. Her head hit the boxspring of the bed, making a rush of pain spasm as she was unable to keep up with what was happening. On the floor, a weight was suddenly digging into her chest. She blinked through foggy vision, seeing Koga with his knee pressing her body down against the floor. Without thinking, she opened her mouth to scream in protest, but that just made it easier for him to shove the pills into her mouth. She pressed her tongue against them, trying to stop them from going down. Koga was glaring down at her, a small smirk tugging at his lips. He pinched her nose, cutting off any air she could get. Ayumi tried to push past it, but she needed to breath. Unable to shove his hand off her, her mouth opened as she desperately gasped for air. Gravity took hold and the pills fell down into her throat, where between her gasping and tears, the pills painfully made their way down.

Koga slipped a finger into her mouth, making sure she hadn't hidden any of her meds under her tongue and whatnot. Deciding he did a job well done, he got off her and left with a small chuckle.

Ayumi found herself unable to find the energy in her limbs to get up. Her head and chest hurt, but mostly she found her mind buzzing fearfully about the pill's effects. She'd be empty, soon. They'd find their ways into her quickly... She had been doing pretty well, too... Only a couple stray ones had gotten in, and that had been at night. Now... it was going to be a constant invasion. She sniffled weakly, and her lip trembled as she bit back any sort of crying. She could already feel the pills begin to strip away her emotions from her, though. The urge to cry boiled down, but so did everything else that made her her own person.


	4. Chapter 4

Yoshiki was mostly patrolling, though there wasn't much to do when patients were separated from everyone else by thick metal. He was actually looking forward to meal times now, since it was the only time he felt like he was actually working for his pay. He heard a little bit of a commotion, but when he eventually noticed it Koga was already exiting from Ayumi's door. He shot a disdainful glare, but he had no right to go off on him. After all, that's how things worked here... Though, he was a bit worried of what would become of Ayumi. He still wasn't quite sure about ghosts, but there had to be something to it. Ayumi was just so normal in every way... Real mental ill people weren't able to do that. Plus, she said it happened more when she swallowed her pills... when they were actually supposed to prevent a patient from barely doing anything at all. It all didn't really add up...

Out of worry, he stayed within pretty close range of Ayumi's room, while also doing his job and checking on other patients. They were all different from Ayumi... There was a different look in their eyes, and they were either antisocial or talked to themselves all the time. Nothing ever happened to Ayumi... but he had a bad feeling it would soon. And if it did, that would add a lot of validity to what she was saying. Actually, he already wanted to believe her, he was just looking for a reason to.

Time slipped away from Ayumi. All she could do was stare at the ceiling as the pills cold effects slowly stole from her everything she so desperately tried to cling to. She didn't feel anything... fear, anger, sadness, hope... It was a cold hollowness that enveloped her insides and left her mindlessly staring off into space. She didn't even notice as she slipped away and the ghost took took over.

"YOU CRETINS GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME!" her voice suddenly boomed within the confined walls. Her body stirred to its knees, eyes transfixed past the door. "I didn't mean to sin, I didn't. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. IT'S NOT MY FAULT." Her face was contorted into a scale, and her hands nervously rubbed against each other. "I've done right! I do not deserve this! DO NOT FORSAKE ME. IT WAS BY THE RIGHTFUL'S NAME THAT HIS BLOOD WAS SPILLED..." she yelled before her voice suddenly became quiet. "Nononononono," she began to mutter quickly as her legs moved to stand. "Please forgive me, please, please. I'll will make up for this," her voice was a desperate plea. A small stretch of silence happened between her ramblings when a unsettling grin tugged onto her face. "I see the light... I see the blood... If that's what's asked of me..." Her one hand moved the grab her other arm, nails digging deep in the attempt to spill blood."AHHHHAAHHAHAHAHA... MOTHER, DO YOU SEE ME NOW!? I'LL PAY IN BLOOD!" she screamed as her skin broke, the spirit unfazed by the pain of the body because of the deep torment of its soul.

Yoshiki was pretty alert at the first sign of screaming. He had been anticipating it, but it still hit him as a shock. He went towards the door, unlocking it and entering quickly. Of course her insane ramblings were intimidating, but... he knew it wasn't her. She was completely different, and her rant had nothing to do with the past she had told him. Once he was in and noticed her hurting herself, body-wise, he went to restrain her arms quickly. Luckily, she was pretty small. He had an idea that her body was normally like this, even when she was well fed. She was just... small, which was pretty good for anyone who had to deal with her.

Ayumi's eyes were wide, madness spiraling in them. When Yoshiki grabbed her arms, she began to violently thrash against his grip. "GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME YOU FUCKING MAGGOT," she snarled, pure anger pounding out of her lungs. "I'LL SLIT YOUR WRIST AND PAINT MY WALLS IN YOUR BLOOD! Maybe that is what they want from me!" Her movements of trying to break free from his grip did not cease. "What shade of red will your blood be?" she asked in a suddenly centered voice, but it did not last long before she broke out into deep chuckles that turned into cackling laughter.

Taishi was on his way to deliver something to Ms. Nakano when he heard what he had to guess was Shinozaki. A little concerned how Yoshiki would handle her first outburst, he decided to swing by her room. His eyes widened in concern as Yoshiki held her arms down. "Kishinuma, do you need me to go grab you a straight jacket?" he asked, since he seemed to have his arms full. These episodes she had could last for hours, so it was probably a good idea to restrain her.

Yoshiki was able to hold her pretty well, but this would probably last way longer than he could hold out. He was relieved when Taishi came into view, and nodded slightly. "Ah, y-yeah, if you wouldn't mind," he said as he struggled to keep her restrained. She didn't have a weapon, so he really wasn't scared, per say... Of course the change she took was startling, but he was more worried about her hurting herself.

Taishi gave a small nod of understanding. He wasn't too concerned about Ayumi managing any damage to Yoshiki, since she was a tiny thing, but the entire situation would be better handled if she was restrained. "Kay, I'll be right back," he said as he turned heel and quickly headed in the direction where the straight jackets were stored.

"I WILL STRIKE YOU DOWN," Ayumi continued to scream. Face distorted into a mess of anger and hatred. If she had a weapon in her hands, she would go at him without a moments hesitation. "Do you know who I am!? Keheheheehe, the sins you've committed are far worse... WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?"

Taishi came back pushing the heavy metal door aside with the straight jacket in hand."Okay, we just get her arms into the sleeves and tie them around her," he explained briefly, since again, Koga probably didn't go over this stuff either. Her screaming was ringing in his ears, but it was hard to be overly intimidated by her.

Yoshiki waited for Taishi to come back. She wasn't too much of a hassle, since her body was weak. Still, he was looking forward to not having to restrain her, or rather... not having to be rough with her? He shook off the thought at Taishi's reappearance, nodding faintly at his instructions. He moved her arms into the sleeves, and thanks to her still being a little malnourished, it was pretty easy to make his actions her's. Once they were in, he quickly pulled his own arms from the jacket, grabbing the excess sleeves to tie around her. He gave a small sigh of relief. Well, his first time restraining didn't go so badly, other than he went in without a straight jacket. She had been hurting herself, so he had panicked just a little... He guessed he chose right, since first you had to stop the patient from harming anyone, including themselves.

Ayumi's ramblings and cursing, occasionally broken up by unsettling laughter did not cease. She tried to fight the straight jacket, but there were no worries that she would be able to break through. Taishi couldn't help but feel a bit bad for her, since the state she was in was one of a mind completely poisoned by madness. Once out of her room, he let out a heavy sigh. That was probably one of the smoother processes of tying someone up, given Yoshiki's strength over her. Certainly was easier than when they had to get multiple guards to try that on Kizami or any of the well-built men. "You okay?" Taishi asked, even though it didn't look like she had managed to get a leg up on him.

Yoshiki followed Taishi out, a little winded, but was otherwise okay. He nodded, his eyes glancing towards Ayumi's door. "Yeah, I'm fine," he told his senior. By the looks of it, she'd be out all day... He guessed as long as the pills were working. So, nothing else could be done... He'd just have to go on with his day, and think this over a little.

* * *

There was always a panic that grabbed her when she jolted awake without the ability to move her arms. Ayumi blinked slowly as she took in her restrained body. The tightness made her chest clench uneasily, but she knew it couldn't be helped. She wondered how bad it had been... Also, she wondered if Yoshiki had ended up finally seeing her possessed form. It made a shame burn in her stomach that he would have... It had been easy for him to want to help her when it had seemed like she was a normal girl stuck in this place, but there was something genuinely wrong with her. If he saw it... would he just regard her as another patient now? The thought twisted in her gut in a way she was surprised she could feel past the medicine in her.

An hour or so later, a guard came by and took the straight jacket off her, but hung it outside her door. In other words, they expected to have to use it again soon. She couldn't blame them for the assessment, since it was probably true. She'd get possessed more now that she was on her pills again. Another hour later, a guard came by and slid a metal tray into her room. "Lunch," he said flatly before walking away. Ayumi blinked slowly at the cafeteria food she had been used to until Yoshiki had spoiled her. She backed away from the food and pills, feeling a defeat hit her. He... wasn't there? Did he demand to stop being her guard? Did he quit? She thought he might... stick around... just maybe. She couldn't bring herself to move towards the tray, too wrapped up in her own head.

It was after three days of cycling meals where Yoshiki didn't show up that Ayumi gave into the reality that no one was ever going to stick by her and her madness. The fact she had let herself get wrapped up in his oddities towards her was a giant mistake. He had ended up like all of them... Ignoring her very existence when it turned out she wasn't as normal as he may have thought. She hated that this boy she had barely known was making her cry. That she had let herself attach so quickly that her heart felt a pang every time the new guard brought her the meal and left. She missed him, but she knew this was going to happen. No one ever would stand by her. She was just as alone in this as she ever was.

* * *

Yoshiki had used his days off mostly on Ayumi, which worried him in the back of his head, but he really didn't wait long enough to give the anxiety any real thought. Throughout the day, after Ayumi had been drugged and then later restrained, he had decided upon helping her. His reason for believing in her story had been filled, since no other explanation fit quite right. So, he spent two days learning a little about a world he had never dived in before. He couldn't say he understood much of it... but maybe if he could bring in books for Ayumi, she could make better sense of it. On his third day off, though it was his last, he didn't want to stay and wait for tomorrow's shift. Also, work would get in the way of first of negotiating with Ms. Nakano, which he wasn't sure how well that'd go, and then he needed time to let Ayumi take a good look at everything. All that couldn't be done while he was working... So, he grabbed his backpack and stuffed a few books inside, then left his apartment after slipping on his jacket.

When he entered the building, he made an anxious beeline for Ms. Nakano's office. He had no clue what she'd think of this, or if group A could even have in-cell visitors. Surely since he could handle himself, and it was his decision, she'd let him... but he wasn't positive she'd allow the books. After all, it would probably be seen as humoring her illusion of ghosts, which she had told the psychiatrist about before most likely... Well, he'd just have to keep his fingers crossed, and hope he wouldn't be unable to help Ayumi. He took a small breath, knocking the back of his head against her door, like last time.

Nakano had finished up with a patient, who had been walked back to the C group. She was about to head over to her computer when she heard the knocking at her door. Heels clicked against the floor as she diverted her path to open it. Her expression shifted into light surprise, a small smile tugging on her lips. '_How interesting,_' she thought at Yoshiki's reappearance. She had wondered if he'd come back around. "Hello Kishinuma," she greeted and stepped back, allowing Yoshiki access into her office. "What can I do for you?" she asked with an interested gaze. Last time he came in, it was a request to feed Shinozaki... She wondered what new request he would have gleaned in this time.

Yoshiki accepted her access, giving a light nod in response to her greeting. He was more nervous this time, since his second request probably had a slim chance of being accepted... But he still had to try. And if he wasn't allowed to bring her books... he may just bend the rules a little and try to relay what they entailed. "Uh, two things, actually...," he started, turning around back towards her and the door once he was further in the room. First is the question with the higher chance of having a yes be the answer... but even it wasn't guaranteed. If he couldn't even be granted this, he would be a little lost on what to do. "First off... Are group As allowed in-room visitors?" he asked with a clear voice, though facing the high official, he'd think he'd always have a nervous stomach.

Nakano watched the young man, her lips twitching in amusement as he noted that he had two things to bring up to her. He certainly was a peculiar person, wasn't he? At the first question, she truly began to wonder what his motive may be. From last visit, she could guess that he was asking about this in some relation to Ayumi. "That's done by a case-by-case basis, depending on the risk levels. With A patients, all visitors must sign wavers that free the hospital of risk of legal action if the patient is to become violent," she explained briefly, not jumping ahead on the reason he may be inquiring.

Yoshiki took in her answer, mostly just hearing it as a 'yes'. Not that he'd be petty enough to go visit someone and then sue if he got hurt, but those were the rules. It'd be easy enough to sign something."Alright... so it is allowed?" he asked, just to make sure he wasn't interpreting it wrong. He was also stalling before his next question, admittedly.

Nakano was curious if it was Ayumi he was interested in making these visits to. Did that mean he wanted to see her on the days he was off from work? Well, she certainly couldn't say she's encountered this before. At his request for clarification, gave a tiny nod. "In most cases, yes," she confirmed. She always liked including a little wiggle room in her statements, so she never actually went back on her word. If Yoshiki ends up asking about visiting Kizami or any of the other particularly violent men, she would have to refuse.

Yoshiki nodded slowly, a little relieved there was at least that. But, the biggest part of this whole idea had the biggest possibility of failing. He took a quiet, calming breath. "Okay, secondly... and yeah, this is about Shinozaki," he clarified, since the request would have to be patient-specific, "Since group A patients have nothing to do, or anybody to interact with, I'd figure I'd help her out a little and give her something to do while I'm around... So, is it also allowed to bring things in?" he asked her, but doubted he could get away with being so vague.

Nakano was already fascinated in both Yoshiki and Ayumi separately, but this relationship they seem to be forging was something she's never seen in her many years working here. Of course, she's never seen the two interact, but if he was willing to feed her and come on his days off, it was obvious there was some bond developing. "Any objects you want to bring in have to be approved by me and examined by a guard," she explained, since she couldn't give the blanket okay that he could bring in anything. It was another thing that she had to make the call on, since each patient had varying needs. Even if he was there to watch over her with the objects, certain items triggered worse reactions in patients, so that had to be accounted for.

Yoshiki held in a sigh, dreading having to explain this in a way she'd understand. Which... would have to be lies. He couldn't tell her he actually believed her... who knows what that would result in. He removed his backpack, placing it near her desk, so she could examine. "Uh, well... Before she was sent here, she really liked paranormal stuff and scary stories, so... I thought it would be the best way to maybe give her comfort... People don't really get better in complete isolation from the outside and who they used to be," he attempted to explain before she even looked at the items in question.

Nakano watched Yoshiki take off his backpack, seemingly for her perusal. Her eyes centered on him as he began to explain his thought process. "Hmm, I don't know Kishinuma. While her having an interest is a very good thing, the supernatural may not be the best way to go. I'm sure you've heard her try to claim her episodes are a result of possession," she said thoughtfully as she pulled out another book. "I don't want to fuel her delusions further." She frowned lightly. She unzipped the backpack and pulled out a paranormal book. She thumbed through the pages, although her eyes were hardly even glazing over the contents.

Yoshiki listened to her, but noticed it wasn't... a complete no. Maybe he could still do this. He knew his negotiating skills or persuasive skills probably were lacking, but he wouldn't give up. That really wasn't the kind of person he was... "Well... she's been in here for a long time, and her story hasn't changed. How could it exactly fuel them further? She's very adamant about it. Books or not, I don't think that's ever going to change. So... I don't think it would do harm at all," he mentioned, and while he didn't like telling Ms. Nakano that he thought she was crazy, it was the only way he even had a chance. "It would be better for her to at least get a piece of herself back, and other than school, I don't know any other way," he added on, hoping it would help at least slightly.

Nakano's professional side was telling her that it was a bad idea to allow Ayumi to hide away in the idea of paranormal activities were real. It was an excuse she used as crutches to her real issues. Though, her more investigative side was interested to see what would happen. Worse comes to worse, Ayumi has more episodes, and she has to stop Yoshiki from allowing her those books. It wasn't like Ayumi's parents ever checked in, so the repercussions of letting this little case study occur were minimal. She slipped the books back into his backpack, glancing him over thoughtfully. "I'll allow a trial period of you allowing her that sort of material," she decided after a long, thoughtful pause.

Yoshiki nodded to her, though he sort of doubted it was anything that he said. It probably had more to do with what Koga had mentioned, about her experiments or whatever. "Thanks, Ms. Nakano," he said, taking his backpack up onto his shoulder. After the customary pleasantries, he went to go get the waiver business done, and check with a guard. Fortunately one he didn't know, but it'd probably be his luck if he was one of Koga's friends.

He waited to be let in to her room, moving past the guard when the heavy door was opened. It was a bit weird to hear it shut behind him, but he didn't act like it bothered him. He tossed the bag onto her bed with a tired sigh, sticking his hands into the pockets of his jacket. "You better appreciate those. I hate talking to higher-ups," he complained lightly, though he was completely unaware of the emotional turmoil his absence had caused.

Ayumi sat at her typical spot on her bed when she heard the door being opened. She squeezed her eyes shut, dread feeling her at having more pills forced into her. She peered to see which guard it was, since some were nicer about the abuse than others. Her heart stopped for a moment when she saw Yoshiki step into her room. Her mind fuzzed out in a myriad of emotions that somehow managed to push through the numbing effects of her medication. Her eyes moved to the bag that shook her bed a little on impact. She was less concerned with the presented object and more concerned with what the hell was happening with him. "W...what are you doing here!?" she blurted out in a fit of confusion and anger.

Yoshiki looked at her, a little confused by her anger. He rose an eyebrow, unsure exactly what he did to earn such a tone. "To help you, that's what," he told her in a matter-of-fact tone. He hadn't known what to expect from her, but he definitely wasn't prepared to confront anger, to which the origin of was completely lost to him.

His answer didn't help her understand his sudden reappearance, which just added more fuel into her anger. "No, you left!" she said sharply. He had given up on caring what he was to her when he saw her shift. He had been like every other person in her life. At least, that's what she had bitterly told herself time and time again. "You're not supposed to come back! It makes no sense... You saw... what I am..." she said, voice lowering to dark tone. He wasn't supposed to come back... He wasn't supposed to be interested in helping her.

Yoshiki was still a bit lost at her next statement. He hadn't left... He blinked, noting her darker tone as he began to piece together this misunderstanding. "But that isn't you, remember? Unless you changed your mind... Besides, I didn't leave, I was off. I don't work seven days a week," he told her simply, attempting to fix this mess, though he usually made things worse.

Ayumi blinked slowly as she absorbed what he said, still stunned even with the explanation."That's... all anybody sees me as, though. No one sticks around after they've seen me like that," she muttered as her eyes fell to the floor. Her own parents abandoned her after seeing her possessed self. She had been sure he was like all of them. Leaving her after seeing her at her worst.

Yoshiki sighed lightly, walking around the bed a little before settling down next to her. "I'm here though, aren't I? I'm sticking around," he said as he grabbed the bag, moving it onto his lap instead. He unzipped it, pulling out the books and setting them beside her, in the hopes they'd get her mind off of this train of thought. "You said you could maybe learn how to stop possessions, right? Uh, well, I don't really understand this stuff, but I brought it thinking you might," he mentioned, to further push them off the other conversation.

Ayumi stared at him as he settled next to her. What he said, that he wasn't going to leave, made her heart elate. She was still scared to believe him completely, but he was proving himself true to his words. He had shown up after seeing her possessed, and he didn't look at her as if she was a monster... Her attention shifted as the bag reentered her mind. She watched as he unzipped it, and she had a jolt of excitement hit her at the sight of books. She picked one of them up in awe. It had been so long she was allowed to hold one, since she has been possessed one day and assaulted one of the guards with it. She looked at him as he explained why he brought them, and something about it made alert ring in her ears. "Wait... so you believe that I'm being possessed?"

Yoshiki felt that same elation at how she seemed to just like the book in general. He didn't read much, but she probably had before being in group A, so just any book would've pleased her. He nodded at her question, glancing away towards the door to make sure no one would over hear him. If he was 'feeding her illusion', he'd certainly be banned from visiting, or even caring for her. His eyes came back to her once he was sure there were no guards nearby. "Well, yeah... Nothing else fits. I know mentally sick people aren't very consistent, but what you were rambling on about had nothing to do with what you told me about yourself. Plus, there's no other reason that the most times you get like that is when your brain is dulled. It's supposed to stop patients from doing anything, or like they told me, it 'calms them down'. It wouldn't make sense for your outbursts to happen then, right?" he asked, as he had put the logical thought into this before actually coming to help. It had also took a lot of mental urging, even though at first he didn't want much to do with her, since he didn't like attachments.

Ayumi followed his eyes to the room's door, guessing he was checking that no one was eavesdropping on them. When he began to speak, her gaze moved back to him. At the confirmation that he believed her, her heart did another jumping motion in her chest. All of this... she never thought it would happen. That someone would stick by her and believe that those violent outbursts were nothing of her own volition. She was overwhelmed with happiness and a lightness. "Heh... You really are different than anyone I've ever met," she said with a small smile. She wanted to thank him a thousand times, but it had been hard enough to say that. She honestly felt like crying in a happy way, but she didn't want to freak him out completely. She couldn't stop some tears from welling in her eyes, though.

Yoshiki stared a moment, noticing the tears forming. He knew it wasn't from sadness, but it was strange... He had never caused such a reaction, so he hardly knew the appropriate reaction. His eyes narrowed slightly as a smile formed. "I guess so," he muttered, not really sure of how to respond to be called weird. It wasn't bad, and it wasn't something he had heard before, so he didn't know how to take it. His hand moved to her head, ruffling her hair in a friendly manner. "Heh, what's with those tears?" he asked jokingly, though he could guess it was because she was so used to not being supported, and being alone. He guessed he wanted to be there for her so much because... he was like that too.

Ayumi flinched at the initial movement to pat her head, her body too used to dealing with abusive contact. She adjusted quickly to the friendly ruffling of her head, the kind contact causing more warmth to bloom in her. At his mention of her tears, her cheeks burned red with embarrassment. It really was silly to let herself get so emotional. "I just... I got something in my eyes," she said with a small pout as the back of her hand went to wipe away the evidence. There was no way he'd believe her, but she really didn't want to have to verbalize how emotional all of this was making her.

Yoshiki chuckled at her explanation, moving his hand back to his side. "Sure, whatever," he said with a smirk, his eyes narrowed at her. He didn't blame her, though. She had been treated so differently for years, and her parents didn't even attempt to visit her... She probably had no idea how similar they were.

Ayumi felt another flare of embarrassment at his chuckle, but he seemed willing to let go the topic of her tears. She turned her sights toward the book in her hand, pushing it open to a random page. It had felt like forever since she had been able to read something... Her normally bored, unused mind was quick to grab onto the contents of the book. It was... a lot of stuff. The spot she was reading was on the nature of spirits that took hold of accessible human bodies. "Where did you get these?" she asked curiously, as she peeked at the cover. Saenoki Naho... The name didn't ring a bell, but she could tell by the paragraphs she read that this person was sincere in her knowledge. After all, the paranormal had a lot of fakes and posers integrate themselves in by dumbing down the subject for mass appeal, normally by lying or twisting the truth of it. Those television psychics were anything but spiritually inclined.

Yoshiki glanced down at the book, his look returning to his average expression. It had taken a bit of looking... and of course he couldn't really tell what was real and what was written by a fake, but he had tried his best judging the reviews. This set had less attention... but had more validating people recommending it. "Uh, around, in some downtown stores... I had to do a bit of looking, though they still might be the wrong ones," he admitted with slight defeat, is hand rubbing the back of his neck somewhat nervously.

Ayumi was still unsure how to fully absorb how much he is doing for her. A lot of paranormal stores cost quite a bit, and books of any type quickly added up to a hefty amount. She knew he genuinely wanted to do all this for her, which she was unspeakably grateful for, but she wished she could give him something in return. She had literally nothing to her name, though. She tried to push the thought aside, hoping one day she could figure out someway to repay him. "This one is accurate, I'm pretty sure. You can normally tell by the language they use. The fake ones romanticize the entire idea of spirits and connecting to them," she noted, since she didn't want him wasting money on some hack's book. "The store I used to go to was 'Crossroads Paranormal Research,' but that was years ago... It's probably closed, but if you can find it, the couple that runs the shop knows a lot. It's... uh... on a corner between the Ami and Sakai district. I'd give more of a description... but my memory isn't so great," she said with a small frown as she was unable to pull the picture up in her head. The area might look different anyways... He'd be better off looking it up from the internet or phone book to see if it was even still around.

Yoshiki noted that, so he maybe didn't need to glance through reviews, though he still wasn't very sure he understood the difference. Then again, he hadn't read much of anything, since it mostly just made him more confused as he kept trying to understand. He also attempted to commit that store name to memory, so he could maybe search it when he got back home. "Alright... I'll try to keep that in mind," he said as he looked thoughtfully to the side. Judging by the prices, as long as some shopped at a place like that, he could bet their business would be going well enough... He'd just have to find out later, though.

Ayumi gave a small nod at his answer. She looked back down to the book, wishing he could leave it with her, but she was aware that anything he brought was under his supervision. It was with a jolt she realized something... She was actually hopeful about her future. She didn't know if she would ever get out of here, but there was something less crushing about it now. "Yoshiki... Thank you, for all of this," she said with a soft smile. She didn't know if she had to verbalize her gratitude, but she wanted to. She wished she could convey how happy he managed to make her for the first time in years.

Yoshiki's eyes came over to her's, his eyes slightly widened. It was really nice... to be such a help to someone. He looked away with a gentle smile, moving his hands to his lap. "It's no problem," he replied, the same as he had said before, though he felt better than last time. Maybe it was because... he was doing more now? Or was it something else?


	5. Chapter 5

Y~ Sorry the update have been so spread out! The story is done, I'm just being so lazy with the editing. I'll definitely do better! I'm very sorry for these dry periods of updates! It will resume as normal, I promise! Anyways, enjoy.

* * *

Ayumi found herself in better spirits, despite the fact she had been on her pills as of late. It was nice to have someone in her life who wasn't a head shrink trying to tell her that she was nuts. Everyday he showed up, whether he had work or not, put her heart in a better place. It didn't stop the possessions from stealing her mind away almost everyday, though. At least Yoshiki was bringing her the books to try and learn more about this psychic business.

It was easy to become discouraged as she tried to read the books. She ended up having to ask for a dictionary along with it, since her vocabulary wasn't as extensive as the author's. Along with the advanced vocabulary, the ideas in the book were extremely hard to follow, even with multiple reads. "It's saying I have to reach an altered state of mind. What does that even mean?" she frowned as she stared at the book propped up on her lap. The feeling of connecting and protecting one selves from ghosts was probably a hard thing to explain, but Ayumi was becoming frustrating by the vagueness of all the directions.

Yoshiki glanced at the book, staring somewhat hopelessly. He wished he could help her more with the stuff, but anything his eyes scanned over made no sense. His brows furrowed lightly before he gave a small shrug. "I have no idea...," he said with a sigh, wondering if they'd really get somewhere if neither one could understand the content. He also wished they could see that the pills had a negative effect, or that he could convince them to try not actually giving her any. It seemed obvious to him that they should realize it was making her worse, but he didn't think anyone would actually listen to him, especially Ms. Nakano.

Ayumi sighed as she leaned her head back against the wall. She took a deep breath before trying to summarize what she had gathered from the books. "Okay, well... there's the body, mind, and soul. Everyone's aware of their body and mind, but few people ever take in the essence of spirit. Psychic's have an active soul which makes them more in tune to the spirits that roam the world. The way to learn how to stop possessions would be to get in touch with my soul and learn how to... control it. But, to do that, I need to have a sound body and mind, which I don't think I can achieve that under the conditions here..." she said with a deep frown. Between the pills numbing and dulling her mind, the constant boredom, depressive atmosphere, and lack of activity, she was an unhealthy person in both mind and body.

Yoshiki looked to her as she tried to explain what she thought, and he guessed it made sense... But, the problem she presented was a difficult one indeed. "How... are we going to achieve those things, then?" he asked with furrowed brows, though he didn't expect her to have the answer. He was lucky he could even bring these books... He probably couldn't have anymore influence, and they wouldn't give Ayumi special treatment. The only one here for her was him, and he couldn't change both those things enough for her to do as she said, probably...

Ayumi flipped a few pages in the book, hoping that someway an answer to all of this would present itself into an easy fix. Of course, that wouldn't happen. Everything had to be an uphill battle. "Well... I'm healthier body-wise now that I'm eating three meals a day. I think I'd be a lot better off without the pills, but there's no way Ms. Nakano is going to let me off them," she said with a small scowl. No patient was allowed to get off of pills. "The guard that is giving them to me now... Think I could convince him to just dump the pills?" she asked with an uncertain glance. She didn't want or expect Yoshiki to get rid of them, now that she especially didn't want him to risk his job by doing such a thing.

Yoshiki nodded, knowing that she would at least have a lot less 'breakdowns', as they called them. But he'd never convince anyone of that... so her next idea may be a little better. "Well, maybe... I don't know if it'll be the same guy when I'm working, though... It may, since I couldn't get you to swallow them, you could just have a separate guard giving you pills. If that's true, then that might be worth a shot," he mentioned, looking towards the door as he thought. Well... it depended on the guard, really. If it was Taishi, it may not work. He didn't know the senior guard too well, but he could tell he had a better work ethic than Koga.

Ayumi wondered what the chance of this working was. If it backfired... she was scared that Yoshiki could get in major trouble. She'd try to convince whatever guard ended up giving her pills in place of Yoshiki, but she wasn't so sure how willing they'd be to listen to her. "So, we'll figure out if it is a consistent guard, and then I'll try to convince them to get rid of the pills," she summarized. It was weird having plans set for the future. She had been pretty aimless before Yoshiki brought these books to her attention.

Yoshiki nodded, feeling that was their best course of action. Or rather, only, really... Hopefully it would work, and the guard would be lazy like Koga, who found it easier to get rid of the pills rather than force them on her. "Right... let's hope it works," he said with a small sigh, feeling a bit of anxiety start to bubble up. He wanted to help her with this, so maybe she could have a chance of getting out... Admittedly, he had grown a little attached to her. They were similar, and were each others only friend, so of course he wanted to try his best to help her out.

* * *

Ayumi was nervous about approaching any guard with the proposition of him skipping out on giving her pills. She was basically asking a stranger to risk his lively hood... Though, she was sure someone could figure out how to casually get rid of her pills. It took three days for her to finally decide that the guard coming in to specifically give her pills seemed to be the same one everyday. She had been pretty obedient and easygoing about taking her pills, despite her unending hatred of the numbing sensation they created.

Taishi came in the next day, the cup of pills in his hand. He had been surprised she had been willing to take her pills, and was beginning to wonder if the task should just fall back to Yoshiki soon. The entire thing seemed so easy. He held out the cup for her to take but noticed a different look in her eyes. Ah... this wasn't going to continue being easy, was it?

"Taishi, I need you to do me a favor..." Ayumi said firmly. She had described the guard to Yoshiki, who informed her that the guy's name was apparently Taishi. She felt a bit bad putting him on the spot, since Yoshiki mentioned he wasn't a bad person. She hoped that would help her cause, though.

"Ah, alright, Shinozaki. I'll hear you out," Taishi said with a skeptical look. He was already worried about saying that much, but she behaved so normally outside of her episodes that it was hard to treat her as any other patient.

"Okay... I know you're not going to believe me. After all, patient's around here often raise a fuss over their medication... but I'm being completely genuine here. I do not need to take those pills. They are bad for me. Ms. Nakano refuses to pay attention to the data that clearly shows I have more episodes on them," Ayumi said in a leveled voice, looking up at him with hopeful eyes. If he agreed... she may be able to get better... She may be able to get some control of herself.

Taishi listened, lips pressed into a hard line as he tried to not instantly shoot down the idea. He agreed to give her the pills... It was a part of his job now, and it would feel wrong to ignore that. But... well, yeah, he had noticed that her episodes had been happening a lot more. Plus, the way she behaved altogether and the nature of her breakdowns was different than any mental disease he had encountered, and he's seen a lot of unstable people. "Ah, Shinozaki..." he began to say in uncertainty.

"I know it's a lot to ask, but... it's the only way I can start to try and get my life back,"she explained with downcast eyes. "If I get worse without the meds, I promise I'll start taking them again with no problem. But, please... stop giving them to me for now. You'll see I'll be better without them."

Taishi stared at her for a long time, considering her words with a worried look. It wasn't that she didn't make a compelling case, but he couldn't lose this job. Then again... all he had to do was not return the pills to the unused station. He could toss them into a sink, flush them, just throw them in his pockets and get rid of them at home... He would have to be cautious, but he was beginning to think he could pull it off. "I guess... Okay. But if you do become worse, you're right back on them," he told her firmly. He wasn't confident in this decision, but when he saw her eyes light up, he felt good about it.

"Thank you," she said with a relieved smile as she watched as her pills disappeared into one of his pockets. He gave a small nod before exiting her room. She let out a breathless laugh and leaned back against the wall. It actually worked...

* * *

Yoshiki was nervous as he walked quietly to Ms. Nakano's office. When he had been informed he was wanted by her, he was a little worried some part of his plan had been uncovered. Would he be banned from seeing Ayumi? He gulped as he approached the door, trying to clear the nervousness from his face. He knocked on the door and softened his expression, so he looked much calmer.

After reports had come in that Yoshiki has been seeing Ayumi everyday, Nakano had decided that she should have a little talk with him. When he had asked about visits, she had never thought he would integrate Ayumi into everyday of his life. At hearing the knock, she pushed away from her desk and answered the door. "Hello, Kishinuma. Thank you for coming," she said with a polite nod of greeting. She stepped aside, so their conversation could happen in the privacy of her office.

Yoshiki watched the door open, nodding at her thanks. He entered, though he was unsure if this was something he should sit down for. "What did you need me for, Ms. Nakano?" he asked as he looked to her, trying to put some formality into his tone, even if it was something entirely foreign to him. What could she want? His stomach was churning anxiously as he waited for an answer.

Nakano moved to sit down in her chair behind her desk and gestured a hand towards a seat for Yoshiki. "I don't particularly need anything. I just want to talk to you," she began to explain. She had to wonder what Yoshiki's goal was by seeing Ayumi everyday. The unstable girl didn't have much to offer anyone. "I've noticed that you've seen Ayumi everyday for the last couple of weeks," she noted with a curious look. It was a fascinating situation she didn't plan to stop, but she wanted some possible insights into Yoshiki's head.

Yoshiki nodded silently, then did as she had motioned for and sat down. Though she didn't seem upset with him or anything, he couldn't get rid of the nervous flutters in his stomach. "Yes... Is that... a problem?" he asked slowly, trying to find out what this had to do with why he was called here.

Nakano laid her arms on her desk, back straight and gaze centered on Yoshiki. "I'm worried it may become one," she said with a neutral expression. "I'm aware you signed the waiver, but I feel that I should warn you. Ayumi is an unusual case, considering the amount of lucid moments she has. If she becomes overly attached to you, the damage that could be caused to her psyche could be extensive." There was also the chance of Ayumi's feelings moving past the typical attachment. Yoshiki was an attractive young man around Ayumi's age that was showing her more attention than anyone had in years.

Yoshiki felt a little more nervous with her gaze so focused on him, but he attempted to keep cool under pressure. Though she explained it for him, he was still unsure of what she meant. "You mean... if she hurts me?" he asked with a raised brow, since he was still a little lost and required more explanation.

Nakano considered how to try and explain it to him. "Yes, that's part of it. I believe this could turn into... a bad cycle. Ayumi will end up becoming attached to you, overly so... possibly romantically interested. Considering her instability, many damaging things could result. In an episode, she could harm you. She'll possibly end up targeting you specifically while in her breakdowns. Or, just the fact you most likely will not be able to keep this presence in her life forever, you could leave her worse off. I'm saying that this bond you are forging with her could be damaging to both parties, whether that ends up a physical or mental damage is still in the air," she tried to summarize, unsure if she was able to explain it in a way he'd absorb what she was trying to get across.

Yoshiki sat quietly, though as he listened, he couldn't help but become a little ticked. He understood what she meant... But he didn't care about getting hurt, and he certainly wasn't going any further in life, probably. Though actually, he was hopeful he could help her get out, so that didn't even matter. When she finished, he couldn't help but let a small thing slip. "And you think being completely alone would be better for her?" he asked, though quickly seemed to regret the small snap, "Uh, what I mean is... People aren't meant to be completely without good interactions with others... It makes them worse. No matter the ifs or buts, I feel more comfortable carrying on as I am. It seems better for her this way. If anything bad happens... I'll take full responsibility of course."

Nakano's eyebrows raised in a mix of surprise and interest at his sudden snap. It almost seemed like he was becoming protective over Ayumi... She listened to him with a thoughtful frown, finding his assessment overly hopeful. The people in A had to be separated from the general population because of the harm they posed. Still, Ayumi was a different case, and he seemed determined to carry on this way. "Very well, I wanted to make sure you realized the potential outcomes," she noted as she looked him over. It wasn't like the hospital would be faced with legal issues if something happened, thanks to the waiver. "I'm also curious, what exactly is your goal in all of this? Are you really putting forth all this effort just to try to make Ayumi's life better?"

Yoshiki was a little worried he'd be punished for that little outburst, but luckily it seemed Ms. Nakano was willing to forget it and move on. He nodded when she spoke about understanding the risks, though he was more interested in the benefits. Ayumi may get to get out... and do all the things she's been wanting to do. Though, he didn't really know what she would do if she got out... Her parents had basically abandoned her, so could she return home? Or rather, _would_ she? "Uh, well... it's still pretty much the same... As I said before, I want to be able to do something for someone else at least once, and make a good difference," he answered, though was finding it tedious to say over and over again.

Nakano had a hard time wrapping her head around Yoshiki's selflessness until he spoke, and it all made more sense. It wasn't just being kind to her for the sake of being kind. He wanted someone to rely on him in a positive way... so, it wasn't purely altruistic. She gave a small nod of understanding. "Alright, thank you for your time, Kishinuma. You're free to go back to your duties," she dismissed, asking him all she wanted to, she had no reason to have him stick around longer.

Yoshiki nodded to her, relieved to be allowed to go. He stood back up, leaving after his business was finished. He was able to relax once he was a good distance away, releasing a sigh. He had been sure something bad was going to happen when he spoke out. It was lucky she hadn't even given him a slap on the wrist... But now, he was a little worried about what she was saying. If he and Ayumi got too close, would the outcome make everything worse than before? He couldn't give the concern too much thought... he had to do all he could to help Ayumi, even if the bad outcomes were intimidating.

* * *

Ayumi found herself in a rotten mood for no particular reason that day. Well, there was a particular reason, but it was a constant variable in her life. It was hard to not let the pressure of this place crush her into a depressed, melancholic zombie. While she managed to keep herself in a decent state of mind, especially now that she was off the pills, it was impossible to not have the occasional bad day where everything awful in her life suddenly threw itself in her face. Even with Yoshiki present and the keys to a potential future in hand, she couldn't focus on the words in the books. She couldn't shake the frown digging at the side of her lips or the furrow in her brow as the words on the pages just began to turn into unreadable symbols. It was one of those days that she just wanted to curl up in bed and let the world leave her behind.

Yoshiki watched her quietly, noting that she seemed a lot more out of focus today. Normally she had a lot of zeal in reading and figuring out the words of the writer, but today she was just... blank. It worried him a little, so he decided to speak up and try and figure this out. "Aah... what's wrong?" he asked hesitantly, since he wasn't sure what he'd do in response to whatever the answer may be. He had never had a friend to help out before, so he was very inexperienced in this stuff.

Ayumi snapped out of her stupor at Yoshiki's voice. She guessed it was pretty obvious she was off today, since it wasn't even like she could fake past the sinking feeling in her stomach. "I... I don't know how to explain it," she said with a small frown. She shut the book in her lap, realizing she couldn't make any progress today. "It's just this place... It's hard to deal with sometimes." She didn't want to jump into a deeper explanation because she couldn't quite think up the words to explain the dread and depression that took hold of her at times. It would be a rambling mess, she was sure of that.

Yoshiki could understand what she meant. Nothing could really overcome this place. It seemed like the depression looming crushed everything in its path... No matter what he did, it probably wouldn't be any help. "Ah..," he muttered, looking down thoughtfully. He'd like to be able to help, but he couldn't be here forever, and nothing he could probably do or say would push away her despair. He'd... keep thinking on it, and hopefully find something that may help her get through this place.

Ayumi looked over at him, a sad smile crossing her lips. She almost apologized for bringing down the mood, but she realized that it was probably a silly thing to say. The small noise in response and his thoughtful look made her feel as if she didn't have to explain herself further. He could begin to understand with her minimalist explanation, and it was a weirdly nice feeling that she didn't have to sputter out each awful emotion this place forced on her. It was nice having a connection to another person..., but he couldn't stick around all the time. While he relieved a lot of the pressure, after he left, it always came back.

* * *

Yoshiki had set out after his visit was over. He didn't usually like going out into town after day had passed, but with his time mostly spent at the mental institute and it being nearer to winter, he had little choice about what times he had to go out and buy some stuff. However, this outing wasn't for the normal supplies, like food. After she had mentioned her discomfort, he had been thinking all day on what he could do about it. Something that could stay with Ayumi even without him around... So it had to bring comfort, and be completely safe, so it didn't cause trouble even when she was possessed. His mind quickly went to the idea of a stuffed animal, though it was almost too embarrassing to consider getting.

Eventually, though, his want to help trumped his pride, and he had settled on the idea. Maybe he could get Taishi to 'check' it, so he didn't have to get embarrassed over carrying around a stuffed animal. Quite frankly, he didn't want anybody to know that he got her one, but he had to get permission from somebody.

He felt completely out of place in the store that he had chosen to get said item. He had to choose something fast, since he felt more embarrassed than ever just being there. He picked something out that was made out of a softer fabric, and had no hard pieces, like some others had for noses or eyes. He bought it quickly, and left as soon as he could. Being in there made him feel way more flustered than he ever wanted to be, which probably had made it worse than it would be originally.

The next day he slipped it into his backpack and made his way to the asylum. When he first came in, he was instantly looking for Taishi. When he finally spotted him, he quickly approached him, since he knew he would make fun of him the least. "Hey, uh, could this be approved to stay with Shinozaki permanently?" he asked, getting straight to the point and handing the bag to him. He wanted to make this fast, and he didn't want any other guard to see the contents of the bag. Especially Koga. He'd never hear the end of it...

Taishi was about to start his morning routine when he heard Yoshiki. The quick, to-the-point question left him a little confused as a bag was moved into his hands. He blinked slowly as his tired brain finally managed to catch up with what was happening. He had an amused smile as he unzipped the bag and saw a stuffed animal as its contents. He still didn't fully understand Yoshiki's reasoning to be so present in Ayumi's life, but it was admirable how much he was caring for her. "Sure," he replied as he discreetly moved his hand to the bag to check the plushie. He figured Yoshiki was trying to avoid the torment from the other guards if he was caught giving this to her, so he'd be careful not to flaunt it around. With no hard parts and nothing but fluff inside the toy, he zipped the bag back up and handed it to Yoshiki. "You're good to go," he confirmed with a small nod, a look of amusement unfaltering from his expression.

Yoshiki watched him check it, though he was already becoming embarrassed. He caught his senior's amused look, frowning even though he had been given the okay. "Stop that, you look stupid," he said with narrowed eyes, though his cheeks were a little bit red tinted with embarrassment. He grabbed the bag back, his embarrassment causing him to be a little frustrated, even though it was just a look Taishi was giving him. He escaped before Taishi could say anything further, hurrying off to Ayumi so he lessened the chance of being caught with this thing.

He got someone to allow him entrance to her room, though as soon as the other guard left, he was already finding it hard to bring out his voice. He tossed the backpack onto the bed, his eyes adverting to the side and the red tint returning. The books were in there too, but he figured she'd know he wasn't talking about those. "There's... something in there for you, that you can keep even when I'm not around," he got out, though kept his eyes away. This was so embarrassing...

Ayumi was in slightly better spirits than the day before. The feeling of this place had varying degrees of suffocation that she had to work through. She looked over at Yoshiki as he came into her room, but there was something different about his disposition. If anything, she would have to say he looked embarrassed, which she couldn't figure out why he would be. When he spoke, her eyes flickered to the bag. It took her a moment to go to unzip it, since what he said had thrown her off. What would they actually let her keep...? She reached into the bag, her hand brushing against soft fabric. She tugged the stuffed animal out, her mind going blank at it. He got her a gift... Her hands gripped the fuzzy cat tightly, her throat feeling tight with emotions. Was this because of yesterday? He went out and got her something that could comfort her. That was... incredibly sweet of him to do. A warmth bloomed in her as she brought the plushie to her chest, hugging it as she felt familiar overwhelmed, but happy, tears well. "O...oh, Yoshiki..." she said, almost speechless from the gesture.

Yoshiki's eyes narrowed more, and his blush became a lot more uncontrolled when he got verbal confirmation that she had found it. "Just... don't mention it... really," he muttered, his hands digging into his pockets as his shoulders shrugged to hide his cheeks slightly. His flustered reaction probably only made things worse. She probably wouldn't have even made fun of him, but... it was impossible for him to not be embarrassed.

Ayumi looked over at him, finding it impossible to not notice how embarrassed he was. It was a little confusing for her to understand, since it was a really nice gift... She guessed it was the embarrassment of him thinking it up, buying it, and bringing it to her? She didn't understand, but she was thankful he did it. She didn't know what to say, but her eyes were glued on him as something just occurred to her. Yoshiki was attractive... Like, he was cute, but also... well, hot. It was more than an observation, though. The thought stirred something new inside of her. It wasn't something she's ever paid attention to, since she had come to the this place in the times noticing boys had just become a thing. Then all the males in her life were strictly guards, and she resented and disliked them as a whole. She felt a type of embarrassment suddenly throw itself her way when this entire thing just clicked in her brain. She hugged the plushie, resting her chin on it so the fluff tickled her nose. The action only made her feel fluttery when she realized the plush had his scent on it.

Yoshiki waited in the silence, and eventually calmed down enough to look over at her. She was holding the doll close, which gave him his own little feeling of success. Had he... gotten the right thing after all? He had been kind of worried, honestly... "So... will it help?" he asked curiously once he could find his voice.

Ayumi was a little distracted by new feelings that made her limbs numb when she heard Yoshiki. She looked up at him, lifting her head a little off the plushie to smile at the question. "Yes, I think it will," she said with confidence that the stuffed animal would be a comfort when he wasn't around. It was childish of her in a way to already latch onto it, which made it a little embarrassing, but the fact is it just... relieved some of the pressure. "Thank you," she said sincerely, touched he would go through the trouble of getting her a gift that could be kept without supervision.

Yoshiki was glad he had thought of it, despite the embarrassment it caused. It'd make her feel better, which was key for her to get out... He smiled lightly, glancing away again, since he was finding it a little hard to make eye contact. "I'm glad," he told her, letting a small sigh slip so the pressure in his chest wasn't so great.

Ayumi couldn't shake the smile from her face in the weird elation grasping her. He would never stop surprising her, would he? Well, the more time she spent with him, the more she ended up liking him... Although, it was a little worrisome how much she liked him. "Hehe, your face looks sun burnt," she teased with a sly smile as she couldn't help but poke fun at his red face.

Yoshiki was feeling a bit better, until her comment. His head turned away, more embarrassment flooding over him. He looked agitated, though it mostly came from him being flustered. "Sh-shut up," he said, though his tone wasn't very serious, nor did it hold a lot of weight.

Ayumi giggled lightly as her comment managed to make him more flustered. It was a little mean, but he was cute like that. Ahh... this sudden realization may end up being a little of an issue... Her heart felt like it was on speed, and while it wasn't an unpleasant feeling, it was completely foreign. Is this what a crush really felt like?

After settling into the normal routine of research, Ayumi was finding it hard to concentrate. Not just because of his close proximity, which by most people's standards wouldn't even feel that close, but because of questions of the future popping up in her head. She avoided asking Yoshiki what the end goal of this was, because she was afraid to approach the idea of her own future. It was somewhat easier to put the question of his into her mind, even if it did put a sharp twist on her stomach. She didn't want him tied to this place forever, even if that would serve her own selfish desire. He was too good to rot in such a job. "Hey... Kishinuma," she said, looking up from the book she hadn't been reading. "I don't mean to keep dragging this topic up... but... I really think you should reconsider going back to school," she said with an urgency to her tone.

Yoshiki was glad they had eventually settled into the normal routine. His embarrassment had been killing him practically. Though, when she spoke again, the mood shifted considerably. Going back to school... He still didn't think he would accomplish anything, and now, that would mean leaving her by herself. He... couldn't really do that anymore. "Well, I... Nothing would change. Besides, I want to help you first," he mentioned, since going back to school would mean quitting this job. A job... he probably wouldn't get back. Then his time with her would be cut, maybe even severed completely, depending on certain things.

Ayumi was a little nervous bringing this up would irritate, or even go as far as angering him. Luckily, he didn't seem aggravated at her, even if she did keep prodding at this subject. She glanced aside, wondering again what his end goal with her was. She knew he genuinely wanted to help her control these possessions, but she didn't think there was a place for her in the world outside these walls. She chose to postpone that subject in her mind, wanting to keep it focused on him. "I don't think that'll be the case, though... Yoshiki, you don't give yourself enough credit. I don't have any doubt that you could get a degree if it was something you decided to work towards," she said, swiveling her body on her bed to face him directly.

Yoshiki raised a brow at her, crossing his arms lightly. She didn't know how he was at school... He wasn't good at it, and everyone around him knew that. "You don't know that... It's not just work, it's smarts too," he commented, reminding her of that deafening fact.

Ayumi frowned as he continued to resist the idea he could accomplish finishing his education. "You aren't stupid, though. It isn't impossible for you to get through school. I'm not trying to say that it's going to be easy or fun, but I do believe it will be worth it," she insisted with a determined stare. He had to understand and develop some motivation towards this.

Yoshiki just shrugged, glancing away. Though they were close, she didn't know everything about him. So how could one voice pushing him forward overcome the others telling him to quit, including his own?... Well, that didn't even matter right now. He... didn't want to leave. He wasn't even sure if it was just for her sake anymore... Honestly, he didn't want to lose her either.

Ayumi frowned at his lack of a response besides a flippant shrug. It was frustrating that she couldn't reach him, but she guessed it was because her knowledge on the matter was solely from knowing Yoshiki as basically a caregiver to her. She felt herself deflate, realizing there was nothing she could say that would suddenly spur him into going back to school. "At least try and consider the idea..." she said quietly, in hope that maybe he'd be able to convince himself that he deserved a better future than the one he had in mind for himself.

Yoshiki didn't respond, because he didn't really have an answer. He didn't know if he would... What exactly would a high school diploma do him, anyways? Part time jobs, and ones just as good or a little better than this... Sure, it gave him the option to go to college, but he'd never be able to afford even one year of tuition. Basically, he was accepting that his life was pretty much stuck here. It was as good as it was going to get, and he told himself that over and over again. Besides, he severely lacked the motivation for such a hassle, with close to no one rooting for him.

Ayumi waited for some type of reply, but he just sat there motionless. "You can't be serious Yoshiki! Is this really where you see yourself for the rest of your life!? You're willing to lay down and accept that things can't get better!?" Ayumi snapped at him, bristling with frustration at how little value he saw in himself. "You've barely lived any of your life! You have plenty of years to build up! You have options and things you can do to get to a better place but you're not even considering any of them! You deserve a better life than the one you're accepting for yourself!" She was obviously upset, and her speech was triggering tears to form. She didn't want him to have a through-the-motions, life-draining existence. She wanted him to be happy.

Yoshiki looked at her with slightly widened eyes, not exactly expecting the conversation to go on, or for her to get so upset about it. His chest tightened a little at her tears, not exactly expecting them, nor did he know exactly why they came about. Why was she getting so passionate about his future? She should really just focus on her own... "But I can't. I really don't have what it takes to get anywhere better," he still persisted, even if he did worry a little over her tears. He didn't want to be causing them, or anywhere close to it, but he couldn't agree to something he didn't believe in.

Ayumi was beginning to find this conversation resembled a never ending game of tennis. Her chest tightened as he insisted he was incapable of improving his life. Was he so willing to just give up? "You only think you can't because that's what you keep telling yourself! You are capable, Yoshiki. You're giving up too easily," she said, refusing to stop pressing on this matter. She knew she wouldn't be able to completely change the way he saw himself and his future, but she would like for the beginning of the idea to occur to him.

Yoshiki didn't particularly want to argue with her, since it would turn the rest of the visit pretty bitter, but he couldn't really stop responses from tumbling out. "You don't know how I am with school, so telling me differently than everyone else doesn't mean anything..," he said with a small spike of irritation, but he hadn't meant to let it leak into his tone. He was just... bad with arguments.

Ayumi flinched at sharp tone, thrown off by it. She knew that this was a sensitive topic to even go prodding at, but something about that hurt. That she didn't know him well enough, or that her opinion didn't mean enough to actually count. She guessed it was ego that made her think she'd have an affect on his life in the way he has had on hers... That what she said could hold any weight. Tears overflowed with the rush of emotions she couldn't reign back. She didn't even know how to respond to it. There were no words in her head, only emotions blotting out everything.

Yoshiki's eyes widened after he was able to clear his head a little. Of course he felt awful, a magnitude of guilt he had never really had before. He glanced away for a moment, but eventually couldn't just sit and let her tears drop quietly. He looked back at her, raising his hand hesitantly before placing it on her head, though he didn't ruffle it like usual. He couldn't do much more, since anything else would feel like it was crossing a certain line. His eyes adverted her gaze to the ground, narrowing slightly. "I'm sorry... I... didn't mean it like that, it's just... It's hard to think I could make it anywhere when I've always been told differently," he attempted to explain, his voice a little quieter as his stomach was twisting with guilt. He didn't like making Ayumi cry... so he wanted to try and do anything to right his wrong. So, he'd explain it to her on a deeper level.

Ayumi blinked slowly at the weight of Yoshiki's hand on her head. It wasn't the friendly gesture he normally made it, so it felt more like one of comfort. When he spoke, the pain she had suffered from moments ago ebbed away as she thought she may understand the situation. She moved her hand, grabbing the one he had placed on top of her head and brought it down. The contact lit a small fire in her stomach. "I know it's hard to not let everyone's perceptions of you shape how you see yourself. When you're told the same thing over and over... It's easy to accept as fact. But, you can't let them decide your life for you," she said as she gave his hand a small, encouraging squeeze. It was something she had fought with her entire life, too. That she's crazy, uneven, psychopathic, diseased, a lunatic... Everyone in her life had told her she deserved to be in this psych ward. Until him.

Yoshiki's attention was quickly brought back to her when he felt her grab his hand. The strange contact caused an equally foreign reaction, but he didn't put much thought into it. He stared at her, understanding her point, but was still unsure. It was hard to go it alone... He glanced down at their hands, his returning the squeeze. "I... If you can make it out of here, I'll... try again. If you can't... I really don't want to leave you here," he told her, though his eyes didn't move from their hands.

Ayumi felt a jolt when his hand reciprocated the squeeze. Her eyes were stuck on him, heart pounding loudly in her ears. Her eyes shifted to look at their locked hands. What he said scared her a little, the idea her failure could drag him down to rot in this place. Past that, she also had some fear at the idea of getting out. She had no family, no education, and no money... She didn't know what she could begin to do to build a life for herself. But, what he said was league's different than what he started the conversation off with. From going on and on about saying how nothing would change and he couldn't manage... He was now willing to try. As long as she got out. Even if she didn't know if she wanted to be the deciding factor for him, there was a part of her that was incredibly grateful how he refused to leave her side. She moved her eyes back to him, a new determination burning in her that she had to get out of here. "Okay... When I get out, you'll go back," she agreed with a bright smile.

Yoshiki nodded lightly, now able to let a small smile out once everything had been settled. How much he hated seeing her upset was abnormal... Then again, he didn't deal much with crying girls. Though... As he took a small glance at their hands again, there was the faint warm feeling in his stomach. He hoped that didn't actually mean what he thought it did. He shook off the subject from his mind, instead thinking more in depth about her getting out. That's right, her parents abandoned her, in a sense... So after this, would she go back? "Uh, about leaving this place... Where are you going to go afterwords? Will you try to... contact your parents again?" he asked curiously, unsure if she was the type to forgive so easily.

Ayumi knew she should break up their hands, but she couldn't bring herself to be the first one to loosen her grip. Her cheerful expression faltered at his question to a topic she kept trying to avoid. She glanced aside, thinking what it may be like to show up at her parent's doorstep. "Honestly, I don't think they want me... and I don't want them," she said, feeling bitter at the thought. That wasn't a bridge that could be rebuilt. "I'm too old to go into foster care or anything like that... so I guess I'll find some sort of shelter," she said with a casual shrug, despite the fact fear was clawing her apart at the idea. A homeless shelter... it was really her only option. She was too old for any type of system to take her under its wings.

Yoshiki listened to her, but the answer didn't sit well with him. A shelter... He couldn't let her get out of this place, only to live in some shelter. Of course, he had a looming idea since he ever thought up the fact that she wouldn't contact her parents, but... it was embarrassing to suggest, and he didn't know if she'd even like it. But... it was better than the alternative. "Uh, you could...," he started, pausing as he was unsure of this idea. His eyes turned away again as a slight red tint came to his cheeks once more. The recently noted warmth was getting harder to deal with. "-stay... with me, if you want..," he finished, though he still couldn't look at her as his hand tightened on her's nervously.

Ayumi tilted his head as he began to say a suggestion. He looked a little embarrassed, like he had been earlier, only to a lesser extent. When he finished the thought, a blush crossed her own cheeks at the offer, and her hand tightened against his as well. He would let her live with him? The thought hadn't even crossed her mind, but now that it was there, it was a tantalizing offer. She reeled herself back when the realities around the situation came to mind. That reality being money. "Yoshiki, I can't let myself be that much of a burden to you... I mean, you're going back to school if I get out, which means things will be tight enough for you already. And I don't have any money to put towards rent, food, utilities... anything, really. Plus, I only have up to a middle school education, so I don't even know how I could get a job," she said, incredibly touched by the offer, but she couldn't keep taking from him like this.

Yoshiki's eyes found their way back to Ayumi as he received the answer he had been anticipating. He knew already that she didn't want him spending so much on her, but it wasn't because she was a charity case or anything. It wasn't even about making himself feel good anymore. He genuinely cared about her. "And I can't let you work so hard to get out of here, only to live in some shelter. It's not fair... So, let me help... please?" he asked with a small frown. Once she was at a place like that, she'd be trapped just like she was now, only there would hardly be any fighting out of it. Her money situation would forever plague her to an even worse life than she had right now, and he didn't want that for her. She should understand, since she had seemed to feel the same way.

Ayumi was prepared to keep arguing against the idea, but there was something about what he said that shifted something in her. To end up at some shelter would be one bad situation to another, where she couldn't even begin to build something for herself. With Yoshiki, at least she'd have opportunity to try and figure something out. Plus... she didn't want to lose contact with him, and that would probably happen if she disappeared onto the street. He wanted this, and she wanted it, so she guessed she'd have to try and abandon the idea of owing him so much already. If anything... she'd find ways to repay him. "Okay..." she agreed, a weight coming off her shoulders. It was scary and exciting to have an actual plan for her future... And it was all thanks to him. Her hand released the grip of his, but she was quick to make up the small separation by wrapping her arms around Yoshiki in a tight hug. "Thank you..." she said quietly, warmth spreading through her.

Yoshiki waited anxiously in the silence. He didn't want to argue more, but he would if it'd get her to agree. His expression relaxed as she easily agreed, his worried frown moving to a small, thankful smile. He was about to reply, but shortly after her hand's heat left his, he was wrapped in a hug that made his heart jolt. For a moment, his eyes were wide and he was still a little shocked, but once he eased out of the surprise his arms moved to hug her tightly back. His eyes shut as he took in the pleasant contact. "No problem," he said softly with a small shake of his head.


	6. Chapter 6

Ayumi was in high spirits in the days following her and Yoshiki's talk. She would learn to control her psychic abilities, she'd get out of here... and move in with him. It made her ridiculously bubbly to think of it. For the first time, she was looking forward to her future. She just had to practice what those books told her. Meditation was a big component, which was good and bad. She had plenty of time to practice it, but the facility was rarely quiet enough that she could completely fall into it. At the moment, she was sitting on the bed with the cat plushie in hand. It managed to do exactly what Yoshiki got it for... She was already attached to the toy, which was embarrassing but she couldn't help it. She even named it. Cocoa... Though, she didn't think she'd share that detail with anyone.

"'Ey, Shinozaki," a voice suddenly piped up from the other side of her door. Ayumi looked up to see that one boy that had force fed her pills. She didn't know his name, but he was definitely a jerk. She looked at him with slightly narrowed eyes, hugging Cocoa to her chest as she chose to remain silent.

Koga tilted his head at the girl's defiant glare, a desire twitching inside of him to wipe that expression off her face. His eyes moved to the toy she was clinging to. "Now, where did you get that?" he asked in false interest. He could easily figure out it was Yoshiki. After all, he brought her food and visited all the time. Who knew he was such a softie. He watched her lips twitch in annoyance as if she was about to tell him off but didn't want to speak. Koga moved his key into the lock, pushing the metal door open and stepping inside.

Ayumi tensed as the guard invaded her space. He didn't have anything with him, so why the hell was he here? Plus, asking about Cocoa had her more unsettled. Why did he care if she had a plushie? It didn't affect him in anyway.

"Now, now, Miss Shinozaki, have you been in here so long that you've forgotten your manners?" Koga asked mockingly as he stepped closer, looking down at her with a furrowed brow. "When someone talks to you, you respond. Let's try this again: Where did you get that?"

Ayumi wasn't going to play this jerk's game. Her lips were sealed tight, and she remained steadfast in her choice.

Koga stared at her for a moment before giving a small shake of his head. He took the police baton out from the holster of his belt. He caught the defiance in her eyes shifting to fear. He smirked, bringing the baton around on a hard smack to her arm. He didn't use all the force he could muster, since breaking a bone would be such a hassle to deal with.

She didn't expect the contact, the movement blurring and confusing her. For a moment it was just shock, but then pain caught up with her. Her hand released her plushie to grab at the pained spot on her arm, and in that moment he grabbed to swipe Cocoa up. She panicked quickly, the pain temporarily forgotten when he touched her gift. She grabbed an arm, and she could hear the guard scoff in annoyance. He gave a rough tug at the stuffed animal and the sound of fabric ripping could be heard, jolting enough panic in Ayumi that she let go before the damage would take the entire arm off.

"I'm sure my little sister will just love this. Thanks, Shinozaki," Koga said with a laugh as he left the room, the metal door clicking shut behind. He looked down at the toy with a small sneer. The psychos shouldn't even have anything in their rooms... He'd just say he confiscated it for a good reason if anyone bothered him. For now, he'd throw it in his locker.

Ayumi sat stunned, her arm still pulsing in pain from the unnecessary hit, but more than anything, she felt distraught. I-it was Yoshiki's gift to her. Literally, it had been her only possession in the world. Even if she hadn't had it for years, she had attached like she had. Tears began to burn her eyes, the feeling of loss hitting her hard. She took a sharp breath before heavy sobs began to wrack her body. This wasn't fair - or right.

* * *

Yoshiki was going around for dinner, thinking about the talk he had with Ayumi a few days ago. Of course it would be hard... but he was finding himself more and more endeared with the idea as time went by. It was a little worrisome how his feelings were taking this turn, but it was a little exciting too. He was in pretty good spirits until he came to Ayumi's door, where her distraught instantly set off alarm bells. He approached the window, his gut twisting with anxiety. "Ayumi? What's wrong?" he asked quickly. He had also decided to use her first name, since not only would it sound weird when he had only given his first name, but it felt like they were close enough that it'd be okay anyways.

Ayumi almost didn't notice Yoshiki in the midst of upset sobs, but his voice managed to alert her mind enough that she heard him. "H-he... took - st-stole," she tried to explain, her words muddled with chokes and sobs. It was humiliating to be this upset, but she didn't have any control over what she was feeling. She wanted her plushie back. It was hers, and that bastard had no right to snatch Cocoa from her like that. "A- a guard stole-" she tried again, but was finding it hard to explain at that moment. Was there even a chance of getting it back? She didn't even know the name of the guard...

Yoshiki tried to listen to the words buried in sobs, but it was proving to be a little difficult. However, he could pick out 'stole' and 'guard'. Once he noticed the plush was gone, an incredible fire started in his gut. It wasn't because it's what he gave her, but rather it meant a lot to her. It gave her comfort, and was the only thing that really belonged to her. What heartless bastard would take that away, when it would change nothing for them? He wanted to jump to conclusions and say it was Koga, but he had no proof, and Taishi had noted that there were guards worse than him. He'd have to investigate on his own, since he didn't want to make Ayumi talk more than she had to. She was having trouble as is... and it was making his heart twist painfully. "I'll get it back... I swear it," he told her, his look turning more fierce as anger bubbled up quickly. He slid the tray in for her, then went off to investigate.

His ways of finding this out were very limited though. He first went to his first, and maybe only, source, Taishi. Other guards wouldn't give him a hand of course. He was practically the only one he could trust, and the only one on their side. "Hey, got a minute?" he asked, but he felt like he was going to interrogate him whether he was busy or not.

Taishi had finished delivering his trays when Yoshiki suddenly talked to him. It was a little surprising to have him seek him out, and there seemed to be something a little... off with him? He couldn't put his finger on it, so he stopped trying to figure it out. "Yeah, what do you need?" he asked as he crammed his hands into his pockets. He hoped he wasn't going to go ask a favor in regards to Shinozaki... He's felt awful every time he's thrown out her pills. At least she had been honest, though. Her episodes decreased off of them... but still, he felt like he was doing a bad job when he got rid of them.

Yoshiki only waited a moment after Taishi's answer before he got to what he wanted. "Someone stole... _that_, from Ayumi. Did you see or know who did it?" he asked, his look growing fiercer after mentioning the incident. It had him raving... Only the lowest bastard would do something like that. The fire in his stomach was building very quickly.

Taishi rubbed the back of his head, a look of confusion crossing his face as he tried to figure out what was stolen. Then he remembered the stuffed toy he checked a few days back, and a frown tugged at his lips. It sucked that something like this didn't surprise him. "I don't know anything... but you can always check surveillance. The guard had to go into her room, right? So, there's a continuous computer record of whose keys open which doors at what time," he explained, although that was another detail Koga should have taught Yoshiki back when he first got there.

Yoshiki listened closely, desperate to be able to fling his fury at someone. When he got the answer, he was a bit puzzled, but he guessed it made sense. They would keep a record of that, huh? "Alright... Where's this computer?" he asked, obviously eager to catch the culprit. Whoever it was... once he got that doll back and the shift was over, he was going to beat him within an inch of his life.

Taishi was a little worried what Yoshiki may do when he found out who stole from Ayumi, but he wasn't going to tie himself up in his affairs that much. He seemed smart enough that he wouldn't go attacking a co-worker. "I'll show you," he said with a small gesture to indicate Yoshiki should just follow him. It was outside of A's section, in a room near the nurse's station. Taishi slid his card through the door's slot and entered the surveillance room. He walked up to one of many computer's that lines the walls, clicking some things into the keyboard. He took a step back, looking at Yoshiki. "Okay, find her room number and the list of whose keys were used will come up," he explained, since he couldn't remember off the top of his head what number Ayumi had been assigned.

Yoshiki followed Taishi quickly, then approached the computer when he was instructed to. He scrolled through the list of numbers, easily picking out Ayumi's. After all, it was the place he visited most nowadays. As he clicked on it, most of the ID key cards didn't ring any bells, until he noticed Koga had been there a little before the dinner rounds. His eyes narrowed, and his stomach felt like it was on fire, and not in the good way. "Thanks," he said to Taishi shortly before heading out quickly. Though he had to keep his head somewhat about him. He couldn't fight him on the premises of the asylum, that would have to wait until he ran into him outside of work. Now, he had to talk with Ms. Nakano, since trying to get it back directly from Koga just wouldn't work. Koga would never do anything he ordered, even though he knew he could kick his ass. His pride was too strong. So, he went directly to her office, knocking on her door and trying to cool his head as he waited. Of course, that didn't stop the flurry of curses at Koga in his head.

Nakano was filling out a stack of paperwork, cursing at the more boring parts of her job. She preferred talking to the patients, getting in their heads, seeing what different medication and stimulants did to them... The paperwork had to be done to get to the more interesting details, though. Her eyes moved away from the papers when there was a knock at her door. She answered it, eyebrows raising at the sight of Yoshiki. She was becoming less surprised by his visits, but always curious to see what it was he wanted. She stepped aside, allowing him access into the room. "Hello, Kishinuma. What is it you need?" she asked, almost positive he had some request for her in relation to Ayumi.

Yoshiki walked in as she stepped aside, but was skipping the pleasantries. He turned around, trying to relax his expression, but he was unsure if he was doing a good job. "I have good reason to suspect that Ibaraki Koga stole something from Shinozaki Ayumi, that was approved to stay with her. She hasn't had an episode, so there's no plausible reason for this action. It's wrong, and could have a negative effect on the patient... So, I'd like to request access to his locker," he told her, since he also had reason to believe Koga wasn't carrying it around with him. Koga probably did this to peeve him, so he'd put it somewhere he couldn't just grab it back from him. Then again, he probably didn't expect him to come straight to Ms. Nakano. He had also gotten better at using a different kind of speech with higher ups, though it still felt incredibly foreign.

Nakano crossed her arms over the chest, noticing a general unease surfacing from Yoshiki. She listened to his explanation with a neutral expression, trying to figure out how to answer him. She knew the guards that worked here weren't always perfect with the patients, but she wasn't so willing to believe that a guard would be so petty as to steal from a patient. "That's quite a drastic claim, Kishinuma. What proof do you have to back this up?" she questioned, unwilling to give out access to an employee's locker so easily.

Yoshiki knew he wouldn't be allowed without a thorough investigation, but it was still disheartening that he had to talk more here instead of get back what made Ayumi feel secure in this place. It had really been working... but now with it gone, she'd probably be worse than ever. "I checked the records of who went in to her room, and Ibaraki's the only one who's been in there between lunch and dinner, and when I brought lunch, Shinozaki was still in possession of it. If that's not enough... maybe Shinozaki could describe who stole it from her? I know her account may hold little water with you, but if we both point to the same person, that should at least call for a search, right?" he asked somewhat desperately, though, he didn't want Koga to know about any of this. If he caught wind before he could persuade Nakano, he'd probably just move it, or end his shift and take it with him. That couldn't happen... He had to get that back to Ayumi!

Nakano couldn't help but feel some amusement rise up with how passionately Yoshiki seemed to be pushing for this. He genuinely cared for that girl and her comfort. It wasn't a case she's seen before... then again, everyone surrounding Ayumi was abnormal. She frowned thoughtfully, moving to go onto her computer. The program that allowed her to see door access was always on, considering she was near her computer all day, she would be able to monitor what was happening to her patients. She clicked on Ayumi's room, looking at the list of recent entry. Seeing Ibaraki's name, a small frown tugged at her lips. It looked like she may have more paperwork to file later. "Well, his name is certainly appearing that he entered her room, but to give permission, I'd like to hear it from Shinozaki," she said after a moment of consideration. She couldn't ignore Yoshiki's claims, and the evidence was piling up, but a locker search was a serious act of distrust towards an employee. She wanted to be positive, since it could have just been another guard using his key.

Yoshiki also had the thought that Koga had a personal issue with him, but he probably couldn't use issues like that as proof. He nodded lightly, confident that Ayumi could describe enough to lead them to Koga. She was a little bit of a wreck the last time he saw her, but if it was to get back that plush, he was certain she could do it. She wasn't as weak as she first appeared. "Then... are we going to her, or...?" he asked. He seemed more calm now that he was actually getting somewhere with Ms. Nakano.

Nakano glanced over at her paperwork, deciding it could easily be dealt with later. This was much more interesting. "Yes, let's go now. After all, you daytime guards wrap up your shifts after dinner, so if he does have Shinozaki's belonging, it will only be in the facility for so long," she noted, realizing they were a little tight on time. She left her office, expecting Yoshiki to follow her. She used her own key to get into section A, but her key didn't allow access into the patient's rooms, since she rarely came to them and the cards would deactivate themselves after a certain amount of time unused. When they got to Ayumi's room, she looked to Yoshiki to unlock the door for her.

Yoshiki followed after her quickly, his eyes darting around to catch sight of Koga. He didn't want him to see them, but if he did, Yoshiki wouldn't let him get away to his locker. Their being on a time limit was making him nervous, but he also felt like he couldn't lose it. If Koga left before they could get to his locker, he'd go out and personally get it back. Out in the real world, he didn't have to worry about being fired, and Koga had too much pride to file a police report. When they got to Ayumi's door, he slid his card through to unlock it, then stepped aside once it was open to let in Ms. Nakano.

Ayumi's sobbing had died away after Yoshiki promised her he'd get Cocoa back, but she still felt absolutely miserable about the whole thing. It was so needlessly cruel... She hardly had any encounters with him, so why did he target her like that? Just for the hell of having power over a patient? It made her blood boil. Her arm still was throbbing from the hit from the baton. Under the sleeve of her shirt, she could feel a bruise form. Her eyes darted to the door at the sound of it opening, a bit of confusion hitting her as Ms. Nakano entered her room. Whenever they had consultations, Ayumi was thrown in a straight jacket and moved to her office.

Nakano glanced at Ayumi, seeing her haggard appearance as a sign that something had indeed been stolen. Her bloodshot, red puffy eyes made it clear the young girl had been crying, as well. "Ayumi, I heard someone stole something from you. Is that true?"

Ayumi looked at Nakano, a small frown tugging at her lips. She really disliked this woman. She was willing to bite any remarks that may get her in trouble, though. She guessed Yoshiki was going through this the smart way, which was a relief. She had been afraid he may do something drastic. "Yeah..." she responded simply.

"Can you give me a description of the guard?" Nakano asked, wondering if she would be able to. What if she had been having an episode during this? Well, in that case, the guard should have confiscated the item and given it to her.

"Uh," Ayumi hesitated for a moment, trying to pick up a clear picture in her mind. She really wished these guards just wore nametags... it would make all of this easier. "He had brown, straight hair that was cut short... Brown eyes... piercings..." she recalled with a frown. Basic appearance details was all she could really give... She didn't recall how tall he was, and he had been wearing a typical guard uniform.

Yoshiki watched the exchange, glad that she hadn't been too distraught to really get a look at a Koga. Not that his look was totally unique... but the records and the close description should be enough. He noted her hand on her arm, which made him worry more. He remained silent, though, as he didn't want to put their chances at risk. He'd ask if she was okay before leaving once he clocked out, if Ms. Nakano didn't touch on it.

Ayumi watched Nakano's expression, noting that she seemed to be thinking something over. Did they know who took her plushie? She certainly hoped so... She already missed having the soft toy to cling to, especially when alone in this place.

"Alright, I think this is enough to go on. I'll call security to break into Ibaraki's locker," Nakano confirmed as she pulled a phone out of her pant's pocket. She glanced at Ayumi, noticing the way she was holding her arm... like she was injured or uncomfortable. She honestly didn't want to fire this Koga boy, since he did a decent enough job. It was hard to find people to hire to work here, so she never found herself willing to fire anyone. When dealing with violent patients, she couldn't blame the guards for brute force... She would assume any injuries were a result of self-defense on the part of the guards. With that decided, she left the room to order the locker break-in.

Yoshiki watched Nakano leave, relieved that they had been able to convince her. Though after he was certain she was gone, he let the door shut as he came up to Ayumi, lightly grabbing her wrist and then pushing up the sleeve. The bruise he was faced with just sky-rocketed his fury with Koga, but he would save it for him to deal with all of it. Instead, with Ayumi, his look turned more solemn than angry, since he wanted to comfort her, not rant at her. "Are you okay? Does it hurt a lot?" he asked in concern, though on the inside he was absolutely livid that not only had Koga stolen from her, but he had hit her to do it. He was certainly going to get a dose of his own medicine once he was done here...

Ayumi looked at Yoshiki, confused for a moment when his hand took hold of her wrist. Then she realized she must have given the fact something was wrong with her by holding onto her arm. Though, it hadn't been like she was trying to hide it. She just didn't want Yoshiki to be more concerned for her than he already was. "I'm okay... It just stings a bit," she explained with a small smile, in a way to try and convince him that she was fine. The bruise would soon only hurt if she pressed on it... She didn't care too much, though. It hadn't been the first time a guard had hit her. She was more concerned with getting Cocoa back before he gave it away or destroyed it.

Yoshiki wasn't very convinced, but he guessed he'd let her get off with that. With a small glance down, he pulled her into a gentle hug, with one hand resting on the back of her head. "I'm sorry... I should have been watching your room more carefully... Then none of this would've happened," he said softly, mostly feeling guilt while he was around her. The more solemn feeling would wear off once he was away from her, but right now all he could do was apologize.

Ayumi hadn't expected to suddenly be pulled into a hug, but she instantly melted into his touch. She felt that warmth in her stomach, which happened whenever she was around Yoshiki, intensify to a more dizzying degree. "Yoshiki, you can't blame yourself for this. You can't watch me 24/7... and it isn't like we expected this to happen," she told him with a small frown. He shouldn't be taking the feeling of blame in this, when there had been no way for him to predict this. Besides, her bruise would heal and Nakano was getting her plushie back right now... Ultimately, nothing was lost. Except that guy's job, she hoped.

Yoshiki listened to her, understanding that they couldn't predict everything, but still... He had been here. It wasn't like this happened on an off day... "I was patrolling though... I should have seen that bastard come in here," he further scolded himself, his arms tightening around her after his curse, where a bit of anger seeped out.

Ayumi wrapped her arms tightly around him in response to his grip around her. He was a much better comfort than any plushie could be, but unfortunately she couldn't keep hold on him all the time. "Don't beat yourself up," she repeated firmly, unwilling to accept any idea that the blame fell on him.

"Ah-hem," Nakano cleared her throat, reappearing in the room from the help of one of the security guards who broke into Koga's locker. Her eyebrows were fully raised at the sight of a guard and patient cuddling... The nature of their relationship was surely coming into question now. Though, she expected that affection to come from Ayumi towards Yoshiki, she was surprised to see Yoshiki attaching to the young patient. She pushed the thought aside to give Yoshiki the report. "I'm sorry to say that when we searched his locker there was nothing. It seems he went home a little early today," she noted with a small frown. It was a little irritating to be pulled around the facility with nothing to show from it, but she was glad she got to see Yoshiki and Ayumi's interactions a little.

Yoshiki would try and believe in what she said, but it didn't get Koga out of being beaten. At Nakano's arrival, he suddenly became aware of their position, though he didn't want to make it look like he was ashamed of her. So instead of panicking and quickly tugging away, he just pulled away like normal, then stood and turned to face Nakano. At the detail that Koga had gotten away, he felt like he should leave immediately. He wouldn't let that sleazy bastard get away with this. "Well... thanks for hearing us out, Ms. Nakano," he told her, then looked to Ayumi, smiling lightly. "I'll get it back. It's a promise, okay?" he told her as he ruffled her hair a little, then moved to leave past Ms. Nakano. He needed to catch up quickly to Koga...

Nakano gave a small nod of acknowledgement to his thanks, watching his hand ruffle Ayumi's hair. Certainly a lot of contact... It was a little worrisome, but considering Yoshiki signed the waiver, she wouldn't concern herself too much. She wondered what he would do to get Ayumi's possession back, given his quick dismissal to get out of there. She doubted she would ever know, even if she had some idea. With Yoshiki gone, she dismissed herself to get back to that paperwork.

Ayumi felt a pang of disappointment when hearing she wouldn't be getting Cocoa back, but then Yoshiki promised her that that wouldn't be the case. She blinked at the ruffle to her hair, and then he was out the door before she could say a word. She trusted him, but at the same time, she was worried what he may do to fulfill that promise... She had been about to tell him to just forget it too. She let out a shaky sigh. _'Please don't do anything stupid,'_ she thought in a small, desperate plea.

* * *

Koga was walking away from the crazy house with a smirk on his face. He only wished he could have seen how Yoshiki reacted when he saw what he did to his crazy little girlfriend. Of course, there was no way he would get in trouble either, now that the stuffed animal was crammed in his backpack. Any evidence of what he did would soon be gone. He chuckled to himself, his footsteps brisk on his way to the bus stop. Overall, it had been a good day.

Yoshiki was quick to clock out and make his way onto the streets outside the asylum. They usually had the same shift, so he knew which direction he headed home in. Now that he was away from Ayumi, he was absolutely fuming, and it could easily be received by eye contact. He spotted Koga on the street quickly, though he wasn't planning to talk anything out. Not only would that not work, he was too angry to have the patience to even try. His hand balled up in a tight, trembling fist as he came closer to Koga, before he grabbed his shoulder and forcefully turned him to face him. Without further warning, he aimed a merciless punch into Koga's jaw, looking at him with disgust and ire.

Koga was blind-sided when a hand grabbed his shoulder to turn him around, resulting in a hard hit to his jaw before he could even begin to prepare for it. Koga cursed loudly at the sharp pain clattering through his bones. He could taste blood as a result from his teeth ripping his gums up. His eyes narrowed as his pained mind took a moment to realize what caused the pain. Yoshiki, of fucking course. "The fuck is wrong with you!?" Koga snapped before spitting some blood onto the sidewalk. His own hands were clenched in fists as he prepared for a fight... He always wanted a chance to fight Yoshiki, but he had hoped his buddies would be around when it happened.

Yoshiki's eyes narrowed, his look growing more menacing as Koga tried to play innocent. He knew... He knew what he did, and he knew he did it to get him riled up. "Don't fucking play dumb with me. After all, it was your goddamn goal to get me like this, yeah? Well good job, you finally have _really_ pissed me off, Koga," he told him in a dark voice, his tone slightly strained from the anger boiling inside of him. His mind was a little foggy from his anger, but he was still certain he could beat Koga, so he wasn't worried.

Koga glared at Yoshiki, a small smirk tugging onto his lips at how pissed off Yoshiki was over a toy and a crazy patient. He refused to look nervous about any of this, but there was a part of him that realized he may be coming out of this with more scraps than Yoshiki. Still, at this point, it was almost tempting to see how much he could see Yoshiki lose control. "Hah, what? You're upset over some toy? Or is it that I upset that lunatic bitch? If you're so interested in fucking a crazy girl, just go to any local goddamn bar. You don't have to try so hard," he scoffed at him in disdain. He was preparing for some type of hit to come shortly after saying that... In some ways, even if he knew this might hurt like a fucker, he was completely amused. Cool, even-tempered Yoshiki was losing it.

Yoshiki hated the way he talked about Ayumi, and warped the reason behind his own actions. It was tempting to correct him, but he was already too angry to want to talk to Koga at all anymore. He just wanted Ayumi's plush back. "Stop running your mouth, you fucking coward. You wanted a fight, right? Or are you going to chicken out because you're by yourself?" he asked in a harsh tone, the fire building up into his chest as it was only magnified by his actions. He would give Koga a fair fight, free of anymore spur of the moment hits, but only to show Koga he wasn't to be messed with, on any circumstance. Just because you think it would be fun to see something go out of control doesn't mean you should poke a sleeping bear.

Koga scoffed loudly, an indignant flare in him at being called a coward. He wasn't a pussy, and he certainly wasn't going to act like one. It crossed his mind to try and get the toy out and rip its head from its body, but he realized he wouldn't be quick enough to manage it. He'd have to go into this as any other fight. Just without his backup. He threw a punch at Yoshiki, putting all his weight behind the movement.

Yoshiki was glad his taunt had worked, though showed no happiness whatsoever. Hardly anything could make it past the fire burning high. He dodged Koga's punch, rearing back his hand and delivering another blow against his shoulder as he moved by him. All Koga had ever been was all bark. He let his 'friends' do the biting, and even then, not a single one of them could do anything without the whole pack. They were pitiful, shameless, and scum, the lot of them. That's why he always hated that Koga considered them the same. They weren't the same... he may be called a similar word by teachers, other students, and his parents... but he wasn't like them, and he never wanted to be.

Koga mentally cursed when his fist only met air. A moment later, there was a sharp pain radiating from his shoulder that threw him off. He tried to move that arm, but the shoulder protested too much that it was basically as good as limp. With one arm out of commission he moved his leg in a sharp kick, trying to cut Yoshiki out from under. He refused to lose this fight easily... If he was going down, he wouldn't do it alone. He couldn't let Yoshiki show him up.

Yoshiki was a little too fumed to dodge the kick, but he attempted to recover fast. The kick had hurt his leg, but at least he hadn't been knocked to lower ground. He got his bearings fast and aimed a hard punch into Koga's gut. Getting the doll back wasn't enough this time. He was determined to make Koga really pay this time.

Koga felt a jolt of satisfaction that the kick hit, something about finally being able to inflict pain on Yoshiki was euphoric. That was, until the wind was completely and utterly hit out of him. A choked cough escaped him, the hit making it impossible to breath. His entire body shuddered in pain, and his legs forgot how to hold him up. He crumbled to the ground, landing on his knees. The arm not propping him up off the ground was wrapped around his gut as he gasped painfully.

Yoshiki glared down at Koga as he gasped in pain, but felt no guilt or pity for him. He grabbed his hair, roughly pulling up to let him look at his eyes, so he could understand how serious he was. "Don't fucking mess with Ayumi again, or else I won't let you off so easily next time," he threatened, then let go and kicked his side. He bent down and tore his backpack from his shoulders, opening it and rummaging around for the doll. He didn't pay attention to anything else, just his hand was searching for the soft fabric. Once he found it and pulled it from the backpack, he tossed it so it landed in front of Koga, slouching slightly to the side. Without saying anymore, he turned away to go back home. He stored the plush into his backpack, noting to give it back to Ayumi tomorrow when he visited.

Koga never hated anyone as intensely as he was at that moment. He wanted grab Yoshiki's head and beat it against the curb till his face was indistinguishable. He couldn't find his voice, because his body was still panicking over the hit. His eyes were narrowed into slits when his hair was grabbed so they were face-to-face. He wanted to fucking murder him. His threat didn't scare him, it instead made a part of him fire up in the desire to hurt Yoshiki. He was too busy recovering to even notice Yoshiki going through his bag, until it was placed, opened, in front of him. Goddammit, he wanted to hurt that bastard more than ever...


	7. Chapter 7

Yoshiki came a little bit earlier than usual, since he really wanted to get Ayumi's plush back to her. He went through the routine checks of the items in his bag and such before coming to Ayumi's room, eagerly entering once another guard opened it for him. He sat next to her, not even waiting to surprise her. He opened his bag and pulled out the plush, which was unharmed except for the ripped arm. "Here... Aah, it's a little ripped... I could get it fixed, if you want," he offered as he gestured it towards her, relief now flooding his mind and his heart eager to see her smile again.

Ayumi hadn't slept so well that night. Between worrying how Yoshiki would deal with that violent guard, and her lack of a plushie that she had grown used to, it had been a fitful night. All that melted away when Yoshiki came in and presented Cocoa to her. She hadn't been sure if Yoshiki would have been able to, since she wouldn't have put it past that guard to destroy it or throw it away somewhere. She was beaming as she took it from Yoshiki's hand. Her eyes caught onto the tear in the arm that he was talking about, a bit of bitterness rising as she could remember the moment it happened. Well, it didn't matter now... Cocoa was back. A little damaged, but nothing that was drastic. She smiled at him, clutching the plushie to her chest. "It's okay. I'll just be careful with it," she said, mostly because she didn't want to go without the comfort again. "Was it hard to get back?" she asked in concern. She doubted the guard had made it an easy thing...

Yoshiki returned the smile, his chest feeling so much lighter now that her tears were gone, and she was happy again. He then shook his head lightly. "Nah, not really," he told her, which wasn't totally a lie. Fighting Koga hadn't been hard. He probably wouldn't have even been hit once if his mind had been totally clear... Then again, if it had been clear, he probably wouldn't have given Koga the anger he wanted out of him.

Ayumi felt much better than yesterday, which was good. When she felt miserable like that, the spirits that wandered around this place had an easier time getting into her head. Though, there had been no possession, so she took that as a sign as she was making progress with the psychic abilities. Her fingers intertwined with the soft fur of the stuffed animal, a relieved smile crossing her face. "Really? That's good..." she said, the surprise evident in her tone. She had been almost positive there would've been some type of clash. He seemed fine, though, and that put her mind at ease.

Yoshiki nodded lightly, but was mostly absorbed in the warm feeling that came from her smile, much different than the fire of anger. As he thought in depth about her future, maybe a little too in depth, he began to wonder something. "Uh, Ayumi... what do you plan on doing when you get out of here? Or... what did you want to do before?" he asked her curiously. He'd like to know what she had been aspiring to be, and maybe will pursue further once she gets out of this prison.

Ayumi was still wrapped up in thoughts of Cocoa and how exactly Yoshiki had been able to get the plushie back in her possession. She hoped he didn't give that jerk any money... She looked at Yoshiki when he spoke, the question throwing her off a bit. Her cheeks grew warm with sudden embarrassment at admitting her dream profession. "Oh... well... I haven't really thought about it in recent years, but when I was younger I wanted to be an illustrator," she admitted with averted eyes and red cheeks. She didn't know why admitting to being an artist was making her nervous... "But, given the years I haven't been allowed to draw or paint anything, I'm probably way too far behind to ever be able to make money off of it," she said with a small frown. She hadn't held a pencil in so long... Her skills were probably dulled down to a nub.

As she began to talk, Yoshiki began thinking about more things he could bring in. They couldn't stay here, of course... a pencil would be way too dangerous for them to allow her to keep, but she could still have it when he was around... He wouldn't tell her his plans, though. "Who knows... Maybe if you had a little practice, everything would fall back in to place," he mentioned with a small shrug, trying to keep her thinking positive. He'd hate for this place to crush her past dreams... but art _was_ a skill that needed constant attention. He was a little worried... but ultimately knew that if she could at least have the chance to doodle, she'd be happier either way.

Ayumi looked at Yoshiki when he spoke, her brow furrowed a little. She didn't know how her skills would be after all this time... She had been advanced for a thirteen year-old... but now, who knew what her art would be like. When she was able to pick up a pencil again, though, she knew she would, regardless of skills or not. Even if she would love to make money off of it, she would be happy just being able to create again. "Well, I'll just have to wait and see," she said, postponing her feelings towards her art. Though, she would have to figure out some path in life that would earn her money. Yoshiki was offering her a place so she could get on her own two feet... She didn't expect to stay with him forever, even if the idea of separation made her gut twist in dread.

Yoshiki nodded lightly, a little anxious but excited for his next day off. There was the chance it may sadden her, but he hoped she would be happy to be able to draw, at least for a little bit. A little more time passed as they talked about the books, and sometimes got a little off subject. It was time for him to leave in a flash, well, for him anyways. He sighed as he stood. "Well... Gotta go. See ya tomorrow," he said in quick farewell, turning to leave the room.

Ayumi nodded as he got up, always sad to see him go. Whenever he left, the loneliness of her cell was always magnified, but at least she could look forward to seeing him tomorrow. She was about to say goodbye as well when she noticed something off about Yoshiki's gait... That he was limping. It set alarm bells off in her head, realizing that getting Cocoa back might not have been as easy as he let on. "Wait, why are you limping?" she asked sharply, getting off the bed to stand.

Yoshiki paused, turning around with a somewhat blank expression. He cursed mentally, but tried showing no signs that he was caught lying. He didn't want her to worry over him, especially since Koga really wasn't a big deal. He smiled slightly, his brows furrowing as he began to come up with a cover up story. "Ah... yesterday, I twisted my ankle a little. It's fine though. It doesn't even hurt anymore," he told her with a small shrug.

Ayumi's arms crossed over her chest, and her eyes narrowed slightly at him. It just felt too coincidental that the day after all that stolen-plushie stuff happened, he would come in with an injury. "Do you really expect me to believe that?" she asked with a skeptical frown. Her mind was buzzing in worry about what other injuries he may have if he got into a fight with that guy. Which she really hoped he didn't, because she hated violence to the point that the thought of Yoshiki getting in a fight over her belonging made her feel sick.

Yoshiki stood quietly, his smile disappearing as his eyes adverted to the side. Maybe it isn't that he didn't want her to worry over him, rather... he didn't want her to know that violent side of him. The side that everyone else hated... When it was truly stripped down completely, it came down to her seeing him in the same light that everyone else did.

Ayumi's sharp look dulled when he suddenly seemed to withdraw. Well, now she was positive it had been more than a sprained ankle... She took a couple steps closer to him. Her arm reached forward, her hand gripping his sleeve weakly. "Yoshiki, what happened?" she asked, now more confused and nervous to hear it. She knew she should have stopped him before he left yesterday. Her plushie wasn't worth getting himself into a fight.

Yoshiki remained quiet, his heart jolting and stomach twisting when he felt her grab at his sleeve. He still couldn't look her in the eyes, but his will power shattered at her voice. He couldn't really stand up against her, but he still wouldn't make eye contact. "I... fought that guard...," he admitted in a mutter, his eyes narrowing.

Ayumi's expression grew solemn at his admittance. She had suspected it, but it still churned her stomach to hear him say it. "Did you throw the first punch...?" she asked after a moment of silence. Admittedly it was hard to scold someone for self-defense, and she could understand violence under those circumstances. She had to guess that guard started it... that Yoshiki came up, told him to give him the plushie, and then the guard attacked... But, the way Yoshiki was acting, she was worried that may not be the case.

Yoshiki his chest tightened at her further questioning, a little more reluctant to answer. After a small moment though, he finally gave her a nod. Yes, he had definitely started it... It was a sneak attack, really. But he had been too pissed off for a warning.

Ayumi flinched slightly at the answer, a bit of guilt hitting her that it linked back to her. "Yoshiki... You shouldn't have... It didn't need to happen like that. My stuffed animal isn't a good enough reason to put yourself at risk," Ayumi said, lightly chastising him, but it was all coming from a place of worry. That guard had been cruel... He didn't even blink when he hit her with the baton. The fact Yoshiki got out with only a limp... well, admittedly, she didn't know if he had been hit anywhere else, since his clothes could be hiding more injuries.

Yoshiki shook his head lightly, his eyes still pointed towards the ground. "It's not because of that... It's because he thought he could get away with doing something like that," he explained, the flame flaring back into his chest as his clenched fist shook lightly. "That bastard... abused and stole from you... This place may let him off the hook so easily, but I sure as hell won't," he said with anger seeping into his tone, his brows furrowing with hatred.

Ayumi's eyes caught onto the fist he was making as he brought up all his feelings of anger. The hand on his sleeve released it and slid down to wrap gently around his shaking fist. It was a little odd how comfortable she felt making contact with him like that, but it was all ultimately innocent gestures. "What do you think hitting him has changed? A person like is hardwired to be awful... You hurt yourself more than him by giving into anger like that," she said with a light shake of her head. Yes, she wished that guard would lose his job, but she still didn't agree that Yoshiki should have taken punishing him into his own hands.

Yoshiki was intent on not looking at her, but his attention quickly shifted when she grabbed his hand. His eyes were slightly widened at her, his heart skipping a small beat. He blinked before his hand relaxed to take hold of hers. "What's the fairness in him getting away with everything?" he asked, the anger still not gone, though his outer appearance was calmed by the contact she offered.

Ayumi felt a surge of embarrassment hit her at his expression, and she was beginning to wonder if it really was okay to make contact with him like that all the time. She didn't have much time to worry about that before she felt his hand shift out of a fist to hold her hand back. It was a relief to see her contact calmed him down. At his question, she offered a sad smile. "What in any of this is fair? Don't concern yourself so much with serving that guy his punishment... He's digging his own grave, and he'll eventually have to lay in it," she said, even though she realized it wasn't much of a comfort. Some awful people got away with a lot, but Ayumi always hoped that things would fall into their right order... They had to.

Yoshiki glanced away again, the frown on his face unshaken. He didn't let go of her hand, but he still felt that residual anger inside him. It was impossible for him to just let Koga slip away with what he had done. He had cruelly stolen something from a helpless patient, and even hit her to do it. Karma didn't exist... Things just happened, and bad guys didn't always get what they deserve. "Sorry... but I don't think that's how the world works," he mentioned in a somewhat solemn tone. True, sometimes the bad guys got caught, or something bad happened to them too. But not always, and it didn't stop good people from getting the same treatment. After all, what grave had Ayumi dug to end herself up in here, and get stolen from? The world was just cruel, and you could never rely on karma to solve anything.

Ayumi wasn't surprised Yoshiki didn't believe in karma. She wasn't so sure how deeply she trusted it, either... But something in the vein of karma had to exist. She wasn't going to debate the deep-seeded mechanics of morality, though. "Well, even so, that doesn't make you Judge and Executioner. You shouldn't let yourself get involved with violence..." she said, keeping her eyes squarely on him. That's what it came down to. She didn't want him getting into fights with other guards, unless the reason was self-defense. To hear that he threw first punch at that guard... it made her heart drop.

Yoshiki didn't really agree, his hand tightening around her's. To let Koga get away with that... It felt completely wrong. Even if he got endless chances to go back, nothing would change. "I wasn't letting him get off scott free... There's no way... I'm sorry, but... I wouldn't change anything," he admitted, feeling a bit of shame in light of Ayumi's hate of violence. But he couldn't help it... As much as she may not believe it, he tended to be violent, and had a short fuse for those he disliked. It's how he was... but he wasn't going to say that, as he felt she would just argue against it.

Ayumi's eyes glanced to their hands when she felt his grip tighten. This entire thing really angered him... He had seemed together yesterday, but she guessed that might have just been for her and his job. "You shouldn't be so willing to jump to violence as a solution," Ayumi said, her grip tightening against his. She wasn't okay with him being okay that he used violence... Even if he didn't seem proud of himself, he was accepting of his own actions. She didn't know if this was common... for him to throw punches when pissed off.

Yoshiki's heart tightened as he felt a squeeze on his hand, his eyes shutting. He felt frustratingly fragile around Ayumi. Maybe because she was basically his only friend, or... something more... Anything could cause him to lose her, and now that he was used to this warm relationship, he was deathly afraid of losing her. "You... don't understand... You're-... If somebody did something horrible to someone important to you, would you just stand by and hope something like karma would act?" he asked, attempting to put her in his shoes. She didn't know the anger...

Ayumi tilted her head a little, listening to him and trying to understand where he was coming from. Of course, first she had to note the warmth in her stomach when he said she was important to him. She could figure that she meant something to him, but hearing it aloud to that extent made her heart pick up. She pushed the fluttery, crush-fueled thought aside, to put her head back into the real matter. If someone hurt Yoshiki, she didn't know what she'd do. She wouldn't want to be idle... but she certainly didn't think she'd be throwing any punches. "No... I don't think I would, but this still comes back to the fact you were reckless. What if that guy carried a knife on him or something? What if you've made an even worse enemy, which will come back to bite you? Violence isn't a good way to deal with issues... " Ayumi said with a worried frown. She wanted him to be safe, and that would be much harder if he used violence as a solution.

Yoshiki shook his head, her ideals clashing. If she wouldn't want to be idle... any course of action would cause turmoil. "Any action would make a worse enemy... because the people who do these things don't like to be bit themselves," he pointed out. Any way would piss Koga off... Violence was just his choice method, because it was all he was capable of.

Ayumi was becoming frustrated that neither of them seemed to be making any progress. It felt like they were talking in circles. She let out a heavy sigh, shaking her head lightly. "I don't want you getting hurt," she said, looking up at him in concern. Her hand's grip on his didn't waver. She didn't know if him fighting that guard was ultimately the right choice. Even if she had Cocoa back, and Yoshiki didn't seem beat up past his leg, she was scared this would just lead into more fighting. Fighting which Yoshiki couldn't always come out of unscathed.

Yoshiki thought he'd be shamefully looking away for the rest of the time, but her next comment caught him a little off guard. He looked at her with slightly widened eyes, unsure how to react to her worry for him. He certainly wasn't used to it... He was so reckless, because he was used to not being needed for anyone. He glanced away, suddenly feeling more guilt for causing her worry. They were the only one there for each other... he just never considered himself important, so he hadn't cared about anything. He looked at her, frowning as he stepped a little closer. His free hand went to the back of her head, pulling her in against him. He gave a light, solemn chuckle, shutting his eyes. "I'm sorry... I'm not really... used to this... I'll try to be more careful... for you, okay?"

Ayumi hadn't been sure if she could say anything that would put this debate on common ground, but when he finally looked up, she guessed he was understanding her main fear towards his willingness for violence. Her cheeks flushed as he moved closer and pulled her against him. She rested her head on him, and her hand moved around him, grabbing the back of his jacket. When he spoke, that warmth inside of her increased to a sun-level of heat. She wasn't really sure what 'this' was... A friendship most definitely, and he was in many ways a caregiver to her. She had to remind herself that any romantic undertones were just her perception, given... well, how much she would like that. Either way, he was the most important person in her life, and she trusted him more than anyone. So, when he said he'd be more careful, she believed him. She nodded against him, a small happy hum rising from her. "Okay."

* * *

Yoshiki came in a couple days after that, he next day off. Though he had gotten the art supplies approved, he had been specifically warned about these items. He could see where they were coming from... Pencils could be a little dangerous, but he wasn't worried. He wanted to make Ayumi happy more than anything. He entered her room, settling down next to her and gesturing the backpack towards her. He wasn't going to say anything special, he wanted it to be a little surprise as she rummaged in there for the normal paranormal books.

Ayumi looked at Yoshiki, a little confused at first by his behavior. Maybe he got a new book? Although, she has been doing well with the book she has, considering it has been a long time since she was possessed. She grabbed the bag and unzipped it. She froze at the sight she was met with. She slowly reached out to pull the sketchpad and pack of pencils out with a look of awe. She honestly expected them to just disappear from her hand, and this all be a frighteningly realistic daydream. She looked up at Yoshiki, eyes wide with shock. "T-they actually let you bring these in...?" she said, still stunned. Obviously they had let him bring the supplies in, but it was just... surreal to be holding them.

Yoshiki smiled after she found the supplies, then gave a small shrug. "Yeah... Of course, they can't stay with you... but you can still draw when I'm around," he told her, a bit interested to see what she'd come up with. He wasn't really creative... so it was interesting to see what sort of things people could create. Also, on a normal basis, they may have not let a pencil in with Ayumi. But, he was experienced as a guard, and he also signed the waiver. Ayumi was also a little weak... If it was someone like Kizami, they probably wouldn't even allow books.

Ayumi was surprised he managed to get them to agree at all. In their eyes, the pencils would just be a weapon... Then again, there were a couple variables that it made understandable how Yoshiki would convince them. "Yoshiki... I... this is..." she was overwhelmed again, because he kept managing to prove himself sweeter and sweeter of a person. The food, her plushie, and now getting her art supplies? She was overflowing with gratitude, but she didn't know how to show it. "T-thank you," she said, voice quivering slightly from all the emotions he was evoking in her.

Yoshiki's smile grew, her gratitude easily received and very fulfilling, but he didn't hardly care about that. The warmth in his stomach was a lot more powerful than anything else. His hand raised to ruffle her hair, since he didn't want to go beyond his friendly gestures most of the time. "Don't mention it. I just wanted you to be able to enjoy your old hobbies," he told her with a small, shy glance to the side.

Ayumi couldn't believe how happy she felt. All of this would have been impossible not too long ago, but then Yoshiki came around. He put a will to live back into her, and he's made her feel human again. She beamed, feeling the familiar ruffle to her hair. "Heh... It's been so long..." she mulled with a level of nervousness. It wasn't so much concern about her skill at this point... It'd be what it was, and she'd work to make herself better. It was about what she would draw... She guessed she'd let her hand and mind just get into that old zone she hadn't been in for a long time. She flipped open the sketchbook, a blank page staring at her. She pulled a pencil out, holding it over the page with a contemplative look on her face.

Yoshiki sat quietly, trying not to be too disruptive to her. It'd probably take a bit for her to get the hang of it again, but he wanted her to be able to do something she loved, even in here. He hated that this place stripped her of her personality and life... so he was trying to give them back to her. Because with each piece he reassembled, she kept becoming more bright and beautiful.

A few sessions later, Ayumi had no idea how she survived so long without being able to draw. Admittedly, she was cutting down on the psychic research a little too much, but since she already knew the general idea, she figured it'd be fine. Plus, drawing felt good for her overall mental health. It was a release in a way talking could never achieve. The feeling of creating a world on paper... being able to put her thoughts to a physical manifestation was cathartic. She drew a lot of trees and landscapes to start herself off, finding her exact memories of the outside world dulled and re-pieced in her art. Then she drew some animals... some cutsie pictures of Cocoa as an anime-styled cat. The picture she was working on today started itself. A small bird with fluffy feathers and far-reaching eyes. Then the cage around it created itself. It was a little too on the nose for her, but once she started the cage, she couldn't stop. The intricate metal working she made up around the bird... the cold steel keeping it from living its life... Hah, well... she'd be out soon. She put the dulled pencil down in favor of a sharp one, because she needed to get more detail in the bird's feathers. Her eyes were glued on the picture, focus unshaken.

Then it all fell away. Ayumi's body froze in its movement against the paper, her eyes becoming fogged over with death. She shot up, the sketchbook falling over and clapping loudly against the floor. The pencil was clutched in her fist, knuckles becoming white. "YOU'RE DISGUSTING," she screamed, expression frantic and unsettled. She noticed Yoshiki, and her eyes locked themselves onto him. "ARGH! GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME!" she suddenly yelled, launching herself at him, aiming to stab him in the neck with the sharpened pencil in hand.

Yoshiki had been absorbed in watching her draw. It was very interesting to someone with no artistic talent, though her latest project made him feel a bit solemn. The progress of the drawing was a little too much like the truth, but he was hoping to erase that cage himself eventually. He was a little too surprised to react immediately, the clattering of the sketch book the first thing he really took notice of. His eyes widened slightly, and he realized maybe they had been a little too lax. Luckily, though, he had fast enough reactions to guard, so the weapon didn't find its mark. However, it still dove into the flesh of his arm, which was an incredibly sharp pain that he couldn't hold back a muffled shout of pain. Even though there was a searing feeling shooting up his arm, he was more worried over Ayumi. She was being possessed again, which would erase the progress they had made in the eyes of the psychiatrists. He was terrified that her chances of getting out were even more dwindled.

Ayumi's face was contorted in rage, a malice in her expression as she yanked the pencil out of his arm. Blood droplets sprayed out by the force she pulled back, and her arm tensed in preparation to come down again. The motion halted halfway, her eyes blinking slowly. The fogged look of death disappeared, and her expression relaxed.

It was jarring to recover from a blackout, but she hardly had time to recollect her thoughts when the entire situation weighed on her. She stared at Yoshiki, seeing blood bubbling up from a... stab wound? What...? Her eyes widened and gut dropped when her gaze moved to the blood-soaked pencil in her hand. There were spots of blood on her... Yoshiki's blood... A distraught cry escaped her throat as her hand released the pencil. She took a few steps back, feeling it necessary to put distance between them. She had been possessed. She had been possessed and now Yoshiki was hurt. What if she had stabbed him in the neck!? Everything was crashing around her, the world filling with white noise as their naivety become sickeningly apparent.

Yoshiki was prepared to defend himself again when he noticed she seemed intent on attacking again, but his eyes widened slightly when the life returned to Ayumi's eyes. She had... fought back the possession? He was going to look at this positively, until he heard Ayumi's cry. He grabbed his arm, glancing to it for a moment before returning his attention on her. He became distressed when she stepped away from him, a strange pain coming from his chest. He stood, frowning lightly. "Ayu... mi? It's okay, I'm fine," he insisted, attempting to come closer and reach for her hand.

Ayumi stared at him, her heart aching horribly when she realized that this was all a horrible mistake. She couldn't fight who she was, and this was just a wake-up call to the inevitable. She stepped quickly away from him, stopping any ability for him to make contact with her. "No... no, this was too close... We should have never..." she said with strain, her throat tight from the tears beginning to surface. She could only see the red she caused to spill. "This was a mistake... Please, go," she begged him as she continued to back away from him until the wall stopped her progress. She was only going to hurt him again.

Yoshiki's stomach twisted painfully as she continued to step back, his hand hovering there for a small moment before hesitantly coming back to his side. Her words hurt worse than anything, and he found himself lost on a response, or any way to calm her down. His expression conveyed the pain that he was unsure how to deal with. "... But-"

The door came upon, and a couple guards lightly shoved Yoshiki out of the way. They had heard the shouts, and busied themselves with restraining Ayumi.

Yoshiki's thoughts were jumbled up as he watched them place Ayumi in a straight jacket with a dismayed look. He wasn't allowed to stay long, a nurse coming through to pull him from the room. She was asking him about what happened, but her voice mostly was drowned out as he was still trying to understand what Ayumi meant. Go... forever? Was he losing her...? His chest tightened, and it felt a little difficult to breath. No, this couldn't happen... he _needed_ her.

It was a weird mix of relief and intense pain when the guards and nurse broke the entire thing up. It was too painful to see that look on his face. It felt like she was betraying him and everything they had worked for, but it had all been pipe dreams. She made no fuss as she was wrapped in the straight jacket, even if it was unnecessary at the moment... She couldn't escape her disease. Pills would never stabilize her, and ghosts would never stop digging into her. She was a fool to think she could ever have a normal life. She was an idiot to let herself get so close to Yoshiki. Once the jacket was on, the guards left her in her room, after grabbing Yoshiki's belongings. The was a small splattering of blood on the floor, and she felt like she was going to be sick. She couldn't let herself hurt anyone ever again, especially Yoshiki. If that meant she was going to have to stay caged, that's the burden she would bear.

* * *

Yoshiki had been treated and then dismissed with his belongings. But once he was home, in complete solitude, all the rotten feelings came barreling over him. His backpack, and the items within only gave him a horrible sense of sadness. He tried to keep himself under control, but as he laid on his bed in the darkness, a small sting came from his wound. He glanced over, his eyes narrowing at the padded bandage, his hand clasping over the dressed wound. Though what had started out as an attempt to quell the dull, irritating pain began to morph into self harm as feelings of frustration and devastation clashed within him. The tears he had fought so hard came rushing out, and eventually he just squeezed his eyes shut as his hand trembled. His grip on his arm kept tightening, and was turning the once small sting into sharp agony as the wound broke open.

Muffled cries of anger, sadness, and pain came from him as his eyes squeezed shut tighter, but he did eventually let go of his arm. He was panting, his other arm lightly trembling from the spike of pain. He took in a shaky breath, his eyes narrowing towards the backpack before his arm outstretched and grabbed the bag, throwing it against the opposite wall. "DAMN IT ALL TO HEEEELL!" he screamed as his back arched slightly and his hands covered his eyes, grasping tightly onto his bangs. His breaths were ragged from the shout and breath stolen by sobs, but he paid no attention to his wound. It was by far the least painful thing he was dealing with.


	8. Chapter 8

Time had become painfully slow. It had always dragged, but now, any dim hope in the idea of being set free was wiped from Ayumi's mind. She saw what Nakano had known. She was and always will be too dangerous to be allowed out of this cell. But now, she just wanted to disappear. For skin and bones to shatter into dust, where she could blow away. She was done. Ayumi had tried and failed to conquer this second nature of hers... The possibility of being possessed was too great a threat. She couldn't let her own selfish desires hurt anyone... She had retreated to a corner of her room, where she curled up in a small ball. Her knees clutched to her chest, where she buried her head. She wouldn't eat, because her appetite was completely gone. The idea of doing anything was now too great an idea to burden herself with. She was waiting for death, because that's all she could do now. Wait for death and try not to remember that look on Yoshiki's face.

* * *

It was a couple of days after that when Yoshiki was scheduled to return to work. He wasn't over it, not by far, but he showed no emotional breakdowns around others. However, his eyes were considerably more dull, and his expression was blank as opposed to his normal bored look. His actions and speech, when he was forced into talking, were robotic at best. He was alone again... in a world where most were against him. The only thing he could do was live, even if it wasn't a particularly special life. Anything he touched... he ruined.

Yoshiki was doing rounds for breakfast, unsure of what he would do. His chest grew tighter each footstep closer to her room, though when he got there, he found himself doing nothing. He held in any noises that wanted to resurface as he took in her appearance, and could tell she wanted to be left alone. It really hurt... he didn't want to be left without the only person who supported him. But... what could he do about it? It was getting a little hard to stand around her and still hold back the turmoil within, so he slid in her tray and left. Getting her different food was his only attachment to her that he was desperately clinging to, so it was still not the slop she had been served for years. It wouldn't help anything, he knew, but... he couldn't stop. He wanted to pretend he was still connected to her somehow, even though the truth was brutal, and slowly killing his spirit completely.

Taishi wasn't a nosy person by nature. Typically because he never noticed the subtle differences in people that invoked curiosity. With Yoshiki, though, he'd have to be deaf and blind to not see something was horribly off with his coworker. He guessed it happened when Ayumi stabbed him with a pencil... At least, he had heard that had happened. Did Ms. Nakano forbid them from seeing each other or something? Because everyday he passed Ayumi's room, she was curled up in the corner with a depressed cloud hanging over her head. It was pretty sad, considering the two seemed to have a real connection. It was what happened when a guard attached to a patient, he guessed... Still, it didn't feel right. When wheeling back his lunch cart, he noticed Yoshiki with his dulled eyes and similar depressed cloud overhead. He couldn't ignore it, even if he didn't exactly classify Yoshiki as a friend. "Hey, Kishinuma. How are you doing?" he asked, trying to keep his expression neutral and away from sympathetic. After all, he wasn't even sure what happened with the two of them.

Yoshiki was going about his work, returning the trays and then going to do some patrolling. However, he was stopped by Taishi, who he looked at for a small moment. "I'm fine," he told him, though his tone definitely lacked persuasion to give his claim validity.

Taishi's lips twitched into a small frown at the very unconvincing, generic answer. Then again, he had asked a generic question, so maybe he had to touch a little closer to what was probably bothering him. "I heard about Shinozaki's episode. You weren't hurt too badly, right?" he asked, since Yoshiki was back to work, he guessed she didn't stab anything vital. Although, being stabbed probably hurt like hell.

Yoshiki stared at Taishi when he mentioned the wound, the memory uncovering the small burning feeling in his arm. The wound had yet to heal much at all, since he could hardly refrain from breaking the stitches, but of course he wouldn't disclose that. It's not like he was suicidal... the self-harm was mostly accidental, and was the last thing he was worrying about. "Right... it was small," he confirmed. While he wasn't being convincing, he also wasn't giving much for his senior to work with.

Taishi could sense Yoshiki didn't particularly want to be a part of the conversation, but he felt awful seeing him dragging himself around half-dead. He wondered how small the wound was, but he would guess a pencil couldn't do too much damage unless stabbed into a fragile part of a person. "So, have they banned you from visiting her then?" he asked, pushing for more of a conversation. If something did happen, Yoshiki would probably feel a little better if he vented.

Yoshiki glanced down thoughtfully, then gave a small shrug without moving his eyes back. "Probably not... They wouldn't care as long as the waiver's signed and I'm willing to go back," he answered. He did want to go back... He wanted to see her, talk to her, and... hold her hand. He wanted her support, and to see her shining blue eyes... But she had cut them apart. She told him to leave so coldly, that had a hidden meaning of never to come back. If she refused to see him... then he couldn't... Even if it really... _really_ hurt.

Taishi watched Yoshiki's lackadaisical movements, surprised to see that his old behavior had actually been a lot more upbeat. He rubbed the back of his head, brow furrowing at the information the facility wasn't making the effort to stop the two. Then again, this entire place only cared about making money and covering their asses. "Then... she isn't letting you see her?" he asked, since that's where everything pointed back to. If Yoshiki wasn't angered or worried about the attack, and the psych ward didn't care, then it had to Ayumi.

Yoshiki glanced up at Taishi's correct guess, but quickly adverted his narrowed eyes to the side. His hand came up instinctively to his arm, grabbing at the wound that reminded him constantly of the pain of loss. This had costed him his only friend, a person that he had grown extremely fond of. He had only wanted to help her get out... and see her face in the sun again after so long. But he had only made things worse, like always. His hand began to tremble lightly with the strength he was putting behind it.

Taishi eyes widened in alarm when Yoshiki grabbed his arm, where he guessed the stab wound was. It was odd to see someone like Yoshiki, who had always seemed composed and unaffected by the world, breakdown into trembles. "Ah, hey, calm down," Taishi said, unsure of how to bring any real comfort to him. "This just happened, right? She may change her mind after she has time to think about it," he quickly offered in suggestion.

Yoshiki looked back up at Taishi, though his hand remained on his arm. At the very least, he had stopped putting so much pressure on it. Though, he could still feel that at least a few stitches had already come loose. He took a small look to the side, unable to think with so much hope. He didn't want to be slammed down any harder... not that he was doing a good job accepting things this way either. "I... don't think she will," he admitted with a hollow tone. Thinking so optimistically... That's what got him here in the first place. Thinking he could get her out, or that there was actually someone that would always be around and need him.

Taishi frowned at Yoshiki's empty voice that rejected any idea of them returning to where they were. Well, if he couldn't go at this from an optimistic angle, maybe he should just look at the reality of it. "Maybe this is for the best, then. You don't want to be tied to this place for the rest of your life, and Ms. Nakano would never sign off on an A patient leaving," he said calmly, a little worried what saying this stuff may do. Right now, he was obviously hurting from the entire thing, but ultimately, now he could get away and find a girl that wasn't being locked away in a mental institute.

Yoshiki's grip tightened at Taishi's words, feeling more wounded. For the best? What kind of expression is that?... He felt a looming depression that showed no signs of just disappearing one day, and he also lost the willpower to move further on from this place. It was the only place for him, really... He couldn't make it through school, it was just more overly positive ideas. At the other comment, his eyes narrowed slightly, his stomach constricting and making him feel a bit sick. That's right... she was an A patient. Even if she didn't have an episode for a year, they would still keep her in here. They didn't trust her to be out... It had been stupid to think he could make any sort of difference, besides ruining everything. He had built up hope in her, when it was only destined to be crushed in the long run. Bringing up thoughts of the outside world, and making up all these plans for the future... when it was all just a stupid dream. To know he had caused her all this pain only made him hurt worse.

Taishi glanced aside when he saw Yoshiki's grip on his arm tightened. Crap, that might not have been the best thing to say. Ugh, he was so bad at this, it was painful. He forced a sympathetic smile on his face. "Either way, sorry to hear everything's gone to shit... If you ever need to talk or whatever, I'm willing," he said with a level of awkwardness. He did mean it, though. Yoshiki was one of the decent guys in this place. It would be a shame to see him lose it. Taishi gave a small nod, before taking his cart because he had to get back to work...

Yoshiki gave Taishi a light nod, then watched him go about his business. Not that it was really something he would discuss. His hand eventually loosened, though against the sleeve of his inner shirt, he could feel something a bit wet. He sighed, running his hand through his bangs before turning away to head to the nurses.

* * *

It was a couple days later, and Taishi was patrolling the uneventful halls of the institution. His eyes would glance through the windows, confirm that yes, the giant steel doors and unbreakable walls still had the patients in them. It was an easy, thoughtless process. Though, he was snapped out of his typical routine at a small voice.

"Taishi," Ayumi said, standing by the door. Her eyes had black bags under them, and her expression had that dulled uncaring vibe Yoshiki's did.

Taishi halted, staring at her with a furrowed brow. Since the incident, all she had done was curl up in the corner of her room. He walked over to the door, tilting his head slightly. It was slightly weird she knew his name, but she had said it back when she was requesting for their pill situation. He guessed Yoshiki might've told her... Or she had just heard it in passing."What is it?" he asked simply.

Ayumi looked aside, feeling a poisonous burn in her stomach. She had to do this... It was the only way. She glanced up at Taishi, trying to appear okay. "You can start bringing me my pills," she said, fingers intertwining.

"Eh? I thought... you were worse with them?" Taishi said, finding this entire thing a little... off. While she did have the one outburst, that was the only one recorded in recent time.

"Just... start bringing them to me," she said firmly before turning away from the door to resume holing herself up in the corner. How many days did she have to collect them? She needed to make sure... that her first try of this would be the last.

Taishi blinked slowly, watching her go to the corner and shutting down their conversation. He knew what was happening. He's worked here long enough that he's seen countless patients try this. While he knew he should report it to Nakano and the nurses... He felt a stronger responsibility to tell Yoshiki before any of them. Even if the two weren't where they were before... Taishi figured he'd be a better help than anyone else in this place. He began to search for Yoshiki, unsure of what his patrol route was. When he finally caught sight of the younger guard, he quickly approached. "Hey, Kishinuma... I don't know if it's the right thing to do here, but I feel like you should know... When I was by Shinozaki's room, she began to talk to me. She wants me to start bringing her those pills, but I don't think it's to go back on them. I think she may be trying to collect a bunch and overdose..." he said quickly, making sure to include that it was just his guess that she was trying suicide.

Yoshiki was going around his average route, though nothing really stood out in his life anymore. It was sort of like he was just watching someone else do all this... He looked away from one of the cell doors when he heard Taishi come up, his eyes seemingly more dull than before. Though as he kept on with his explanation, his expression began to morph slightly with shock. Huh? She was...? She wouldn't take her medicine willingly... so it probably wasn't just a hunch. His heart jolted with fear, and without thinking, he shoved past Taishi.

He made a beeline for Ayumi's room. He knew he wasn't on a time limit, but if she was seriously thinking about doing something so... awful, he couldn't just wait around. He opened her door, approaching her quickly. He was to her before the door shut on its own with a heavy clang. "What the hell is with you?! Violence is wrong... but this is a right answer?!" he asked harshly, trying to keep his emotions back for the most part, but he was already finding it hard.

Ayumi jumped slightly at the unexpected visitor, the clanking of the door opening and closing startling her. Her eyes widened at the sight of Yoshiki, her entire body coiling in pain as he started to talk. She hugged her knees closer to the chest, looking away from him, because it was too much. She mentally cursed, catching on that Taishi probably knew what she was trying and ratted her out to Yoshiki. She felt cornered and hopeless... She needed to find some way out of a lifetime of this. "I don't have another choice..." she said flatly. If she couldn't manage it from pills... she'd figure something out. She had to. Being holed up like this when her sanity was intact was too much, but she couldn't go out of this room because of those moments she lost it. She was trapped.

Yoshiki glared at her, feeling her actions were incredibly selfish... and stupid. She was accepting that she was stuck in here, and while logically it seemed that would be the case, he just wouldn't accept it. She didn't belong here... she had been doing great! It was just one slip up, and now she aimed to kill herself... It was getting a little harder to keep his eyes dry, but he was determined not to break down completely in public. "You _do_, you're just scared. That's fine, but pulling something like this... Just because you cut me off doesn't mean I stopped caring!" he exclaimed, his breath coming out in small pants as his heightened emotions caused his heart to race. Maybe he was being selfish too... not that that mattered to him at the moment.

Ayumi's eyes were pulled back to him, staring at him with wide eyes. She didn't want to hurt him... or anyone, but especially not him. She had to cut him off, because it was the only way to get him to a point where he could stop caring about her. Nothing good could come from an attachment with her. "I don't! Even if I don't get possessed for years, they will never let me out of here! And for good reason! It would take one slip-up... one momentary lapse... I could kill someone. I have nothing to work for..." she said, squeezing her eyes shut as she pushed back tears. It was absolutely hopeless. As much as she wanted to get out of here and live with Yoshiki... to have something resembling a normal life, she couldn't.

Yoshiki shook his head, giving her a hard stare. He couldn't accept that there were no paths open for her. At least more choices than suicide... "You can't worry about fictional things. Your work wasn't for nothing. I get that you're scared to hurt someone. I get it! But you were making so much progress. You fought back! You regained control. That means something, right? And there has to be people with your ability that can control it... like Naho," he tried to further convince her, but now his tone was devolving from forceful to somewhat of a plea. Begging her to understand, even if it was coming from the sole, perhaps selfish, want to be as they were. At this point, he didn't even care really about her getting out. He just wanted the only person he had ever depended so heavily on to stop shoving him away. He glanced to the side before his eyes squeezed shut, and his hand subconsciously returned to its clenched spot against his arm. "Please... I need you," he begged in a quiet, shaky voice.

Ayumi couldn't accept anything he said as proof as she would have more avenues opened. Yes... the possession had been cut off shorter than normally, but she had no clue how that even happened. And Naho... Naho had a mentor through her years of psychic development. Ayumi was stumbling along with vague books and convoluted ideas. The shift in his tone was hurting her head, because she wanted him to be her companion... She wanted to keep the tie, but she knew she shouldn't. She cringed at his beg, everything aching in a desire to give in. She let out a shaky breath. "...Quit this job, Yoshiki. Go back to school... forget about me," she told him firmly. She couldn't waver. She was going to be trapped in here forever, no matter the attitude she had towards it. If she gave into this... he'd feel like he'd have to stay with her. He needed to get out of this place, away from her and all the craziness surrounding.

Yoshiki remained quiet for a moment after her response, the tight feeling in his chest difficult to overcome. He eventually opened his eyes once he was sure he wouldn't break down, though they were narrowed in adamant defiance. "No," he replied sternly, stepping away a few steps. Nothing would convince her... but at least now she knew he definitely wasn't leaving, no matter what she did. If she wouldn't try... then why did he stand a chance? Besides, this whole thing proved that he couldn't be a help to anybody. He turned away to leave, uncertain of what would come next. Would she really commit suicide? He didn't really want to think about it... but what else could he do? What he said no longer mattered to her...

Ayumi's look was sullen at his firm reply. He was adamant in his decision to stay here, and it just made everything that much harder. She stared at him as he turned to leave, heart aching. She hated that it had to be this way... but nothing good would come from their attachment to each other. She just hoped he would move away from her by the time she pushed forward with her end...

* * *

Left bleeding on the pavement that night, Koga was left with such a boiling bit of rage in his stomach that he felt like breaking in Yoshiki's head. After getting home, cleaning up, and going to bed, the hatred seethed on strongly. It was something unlike he's ever felt before. Koga always disliked Yoshiki's attitude... but there was something triggered in him that was no longer as innocent as simply wanting to mess with him. He wanted to see Yoshiki's head broken open. But, he also didn't want to go to jail. While ideas flickered in his mind like a slideshow, none of them ever presented themselves easy to pull off. He knew some details that he could easily pull off... but it was a lot of chance.

Though, that chance seemed a lot less risky when he saw Yoshiki enter Ayumi's room. Perfect... He'd have to come out, probably soon given the hissy fit she had thrown days ago. He left quickly, going to grab his dinner cart early... He fought to keep his expression neutral as he began to carry out the plan he wasn't sure would work, but was willing to give it a shot. After all, if things fell to pieces... he'd be able to pass off blame. With the cart, he stopped by his locker to grab a glass from his bag. It had been hidden between bundled up clothes and was the only weapon-like thing he could bring in without overt suspicion. He found the tray of the person in question and put the glass on it.

He forced himself to go through progression with no difference in his normal routine. Finally, he got to the room which would do his dirty work for him. Koga smirked lightly as he shoved the tray through, the glass gleaming on the tray. He pulled out a card he stole from the locker room... He felt a bit bad about throwing one of his buddies under the bus, but it would be worth it. He swiped the card through, letting the door crack open slightly. He quickly turned heel, abandoning the cart and slipped into a vacant room next to the door he just opened. He was laughing lightly under his breath. Adrenaline was pumping hard through his blood that he had been able to get that far into the plan. Now, he had to hope that timing would work out...

This room was so dark and dull... the same scenery for... how long had it been? Way too long... It was gray and boring in here. He missed the red he had painted his 'best friend's' room in. It was a much better color...

Yuuya's eyes slowly opened, his arms twitching to life at the sound of the tray he was always given. Day after day... though, it wasn't like he could tell. All of time mushed together in the same, insufferable moment. He pulled himself up to sit on the thing they called a bed, his dark eyes trailing over listlessly to the tray. Though, a glare of light quickly caught his attention. Something out of the norm was instantly more interesting than anything else. He cautiously approached the tray, gently picking up the source of the reflection. A glass...

As one hand gingerly held the fragile cup, his fingers traced the rim and his eyes caught onto the light gleaming against the uncommon good. He investigated it a small moment, mostly considering spilling his own blood. After all, how else would he relish the chance to see that beautiful red? But before he could really give the idea any thought, he noticed there was also light in a small sliver against his wall. His eyes followed the trail, and the end was a very intriguing find. The door, opened, unlocked. The shock remained only for a moment until a cruel, excited smile formed on his lips.

He turned the glass a little more, seemingly trying to figure out which angle would produce the best weapon. He reared back his hand once satisfied, and broke the glass against his wall. The gamble proved beneficial, the break producing a nice, long, sharp shard of glass. The glint in his eye became brighter, his heart fueled by the joy of getting this chance. To kill again... It was absolutely exhilarating! He was already feeling that wonderful adrenaline. He quietly pulled open the door, but saw no victim yet. That was, until he heard the sound of another door opening.

Feeling that his chance was but a fleeting one, he was quick to jump into action. He wasn't crazy... in his own definition. Killing was such a big part of human nature. Others just didn't know the fun... But while he wanted to absorb the action itself, he wouldn't be careless. Though different guards had different strengths and builds, they all carried that blasted baton in the same place. Therefore, he wouldn't even need to see his target fully yet to disarm him. Everything was in his advantage.

He moved towards the guard, his reflexes fast in snatching the baton from his belt and tossing it back into the patient room he had come from. Of course, initially, Yuuya wasn't worried about some nutcase foiling his chance. Why would they? He expected whoever it was to sit and mumble to themselves, as did everyone else in this place. With that done, he tackled into the guard to knock him on his back, and was quick in committing the actual assault. He rose the sharp glass, stabbing it into the guards side. As the red seeped out around the glass and into the guard's clothes, his smile grew and his eyes became crazed with glee. His hand rose as his other held down the guard by his throat, mostly to distract his hands from fighting off the real danger. His hand sunk the shard back into his flesh for a second time, putting pressure to dive the weapon in further. The laughter that began overtook the guard's muffled, choking shouts of pain. Though he didn't care... he'd tear this guy to pieces before the others came around.

Ayumi was watching Yoshiki's back disappear one second, and then the next his baton was tossed into her room. She blinked slowly, disoriented by the odd event. Yoshiki's screams of pain snapped her out of her curled up position, standing in alarm. She didn't know what she was thinking, but her hands scrambled for the blunt police baton. Her door hadn't shut itself, but she was hesitant to leave or get close to the door. She couldn't allow idleness, though, not with something obviously wrong happening. Her feet took long strides, and outside the small window of her door, she saw the sight that twisted her gut and churned her stomach. A patient had pinned Yoshiki down, holding his throat and stabbing him. The red of blood was soaking the glass shard in his hand and the sterile floors of the asylum. She saw with wide, terrified eyes when the glass was thrust into him for a second wound. The laughter of the assailant dug into her brain, but it wasn't close to the shattering effects Yoshiki's pained yells had on her. It triggered something awful in her gut, a protective fire that made it hard to breath or think. It didn't even take a second for her to push herself into action. She moved herself out of the door, the baton held in both her hands. She swung the weapon at the other patient's head with as much force as she could possibly muster. She didn't expect to knock him out. She knew she couldn't take him in a fight. But, she didn't care about her own safety at this point. She just wanted him to stop hurting Yoshiki.

Yuuya was still reveling in the guard's yells and the blood bubbling up around the glass. He had been taken completely by surprise when there was a hard hit to his head. For a second, he was completely disoriented, but then he was over taken by anger. Who the hell had done that?! He lifted his head after he recovered, his hand leaving the glass to hold his head for a small moment. When his maddened eyes took in the identity of his assailant, his anger grew. Why the hell was a patient protecting a guard?! The action made no sense, but he hardly cared. He sprung off of the guard and wrapped his hands tightly around the patient's throat. "You little _bitch_! You think you're some kind of fucking hero?!" he screamed out as his grip around her throat tightened. The guard on the floor seemed distressed about the strangling, but he wasn't able to take any sort of action as he bled out on the floor.

Ayumi had achieved in getting him off Yoshiki, but she hadn't considered the fact that as his target, she would get attacked as well. His hands were around her throat in an instance. She dropped the weapon, her hands clawing at him in an attempt to get his grip to slacken. She couldn't speak or breath, which was terrifying to try and gasp for air and have nothing happen. She quickly felt weak, her clawing becoming desperate, weak grabs. It was with a horrible, gut-sinking jolt that she realized she didn't want to die. She wasn't ready to give up and become dust.

Taishi had heard a commotion during his patrolling, so his feet quickly moved him out of reaction. It was definitely off to hear anything but craziness in these hallways, but he had definitely heard yells of pain that seemed weirdly close to Yoshiki's voice. The picture he was met with resulted in him freezing for a moment. Yoshiki was on the floor, stabbed, with a large puddle of blood forming around him. Kizami had his hands around Ayumi's throat, and was screaming at her. His instincts kicked into action as his hand moved to his belt. He passed over the baton and went straight for his assigned taser gun. He didn't hesitate to aim, put his finger on the trigger, and pull.

The blow was quick, and Yuuya had no time to prepare for it. It happened in a flash. One second, he was choking the life out of a girl patient, and the next there was an intense pain shooting all throughout his body. The electricity scrambled his brain completely, and his body was forced to let go of Ayumi and fall to the floor, racked with spasms with the current flowing through each muscle.

Yoshiki couldn't really understand much of what was going on with his brain fogging over, and the agonizing pain coming from his side. He had just seen Kizami give up attacking him, and going for Ayumi instead. His heart had been beating fast and fear had been coursing through every inch of his body, yet it had refused to move. He was helpless to do anything but pant. Though at the distinct, buzzing noise of the familiar taser gun, he became somewhat relieved. He still was unsure if Ayumi was okay, though... He attempted to make some sort of speech, but nothing would come out. His vision was fading, despite his desperate fight to cling to consciousness. Ayumi had to be okay... she couldn't die! He just wanted to make sure... she was okay...

Ayumi would have never expected the grip around her neck to release her, but it happened. She hit the floor, gasping to refill her burning lungs. She was trembling, her eyes moving to the twitching form of the other patient. She didn't care about him, though. Once she confirmed he was out of it, she crawled over to Yoshiki, tears forming at the corner of his eyes. There was so much blood... so much more than when she had attacked him with the pencil. An alarm system came to life overhead, and she guessed Taishi was calling over help. "Yoshiki, please don't die..." she said with strain, her hand weaving into his hair in a small, comforting gesture. She wanted to hug him but was terrified of causing him more pain. "I- I need you too," she said, a sob escaping her. Faced with the irreversible threat of death, she didn't care about anything else but him staying by her side.

Yoshiki was struggling to keep awake, but then Ayumi's voice brought back his consciousness slightly. His eyes forced themselves open, but they didn't make it very far. He still could hear her voice. Ayumi... didn't want him to die... He didn't want to give up in the first place, but... he didn't want to leave Ayumi by herself. The contact she gave was actually very soothing, but he still couldn't fight away the creeping darkness. His eyes closed, though his labored pants were an easy sign that he wasn't dead.

Even if Yoshiki was still breathing, Ayumi felt panic rise as he fell unconscious. "YOSHIKI!" she yelled, openly sobbing with fear that their last talk was how everything would end... that she had rejected him in their last moments together... People came rushing into the hallway, and she felt a guard pull her away from him. She pushed back, unwilling to leave him alone, but she could hardly overpower anyone. The guard shoved her back into her room, shutting the heavy metal door. She stared out the small window as some took Kizami's twitching body back to his room, and others were attending to Yoshiki. Nurses came by minutes later, and his body was on a stretcher. She moved her head as much as she could to keep a view on him, but he was gone within moments. After all the people cleared out, even with the mumbling of the mentally sick, it felt deadly quiet in the hallways. Her eyes were wide, staring at the blood left behind from Yoshiki. Her hand clutched her chest, the pain unwavering.


	9. Chapter 9

Yoshiki had been out of work for nearly a week, which was much too long for him to be comfortable with. The first okay he got, even though it included a warning, he was back in his guard uniform. Though, as he was getting ready, his eyes caught onto the backpack that was still slumped up against the wall. He picked it up slowly, since any fast movements hurt a bit. The flap was open, so his hand reached into it and rummaged around, before pulling out the small plushy. He blinked, frowning as he glanced down. He squeezed the small cat lightly, before giving a solemn sigh. He tossed it back in, zipping it shut and moving the strap onto his shoulder.

At the asylum, he stored the backpack into his locker before starting his rounds for breakfast. The anxiety coming to Ayumi's room was greater this time, because their last talk had resulted in nothing. If anything, it had made him feel so much worse... As he came to her room, he slid in her tray, but wasn't going to say anything.

Ayumi felt like she was slowly losing her mind. No one had come around to tell her anything, even Taishi. Yoshiki's funeral could have already happened, and she may never know... Maybe he survived but quit this job... Which is what she told him to do last time they spoke. She still wasn't sure if their relationship was good or healthy for either of them, but if he wasn't going to quit the job... She didn't want to keep not seeing him. Things felt so much worse than before he had entered her life. Though, the oppressiveness didn't stir her suicidal thoughts like before. She wasn't sure if she was still clinging to a hope to get out, or if it was just wanting to see Yoshiki that wiped away the dark thoughts. She glanced up to her tray, expecting to see one of the many guards that had ran Yoshiki's trays for him. But, no, she was met with blue-gray eyes and blond hair that made her shoot off her bed. Her heart picked up to a worrying speed in her chest, but that didn't matter. He was alive. "Yoshiki! You're okay!?" she said in rushed shock.

Yoshiki was prepared to leave and just drop off the tray, like he had the past few times, but Ayumi's voice called and he found himself frozen. He blinked at her, surprised she was talking to him. Well, they had been friends at some point, so he guessed it may be natural to worry... If Ayumi had been in his place, he would've gone nuts waiting to hear if she was okay. He retraced his steps back to the door, still trying to think up a response past his shock. He nodded slowly, pushing his hands into his pockets. "Y-yeah... I don't go down very easily," he mentioned with a small, unsure smile as his eyes glanced away. He didn't know how to respond... He felt like he was being jerked around a little, and his mind was too jumbled to really understand.

Ayumi smiled in relief, although his behavior seemed... a little off. She didn't expect them to fall back exactly how they had been at first, but he seemed a little uncertain of her. She tried to shake off the thought, figuring it was just a readjustment... Unless, he hadn't heard what she said before he passed out... "I'm really glad you're okay..." she said genuinely, feeling a weight finally taken off her shoulders. She had thought he was dead. After all, his injuries hadn't been as little as the pencil wound she gave him. She could still remember all that blood he spilled... It was terrifying.

Yoshiki looked at her, and though it was a natural feeling, it still surprised him. Well, just because she had cut him off didn't mean she didn't care about him... It was probably the opposite, actually. He may have been more shocked that she was telling him how happy she was, instead of it just being an internal thing. "I... I'm glad you're okay, too," he mentioned hesitantly. Since he had woken up in the hospital, he had been panicking over Ayumi's overdose plot. Not only did a week out of work make him miss out on money, but he was also concerned she would carry out her plan while he was gone. It was a relief to get here, and her name still be on his chart.

Ayumi wasn't sure why he was sharing the sentiment back to her, since the crazy patient's attempts of choking her were ineffective. Then she remembered everything about their last conversation, which included her resolve in killing herself. "Oh... I'm uh... not planning to do that anymore," she assured him. He had been so angry with her and the decision she had made. Which she could understand... If things had been swapped, she would never want Yoshiki doing anything of the sort. Even if she still felt lost with her entire life, that clash with that patient shifted her views enough that she wasn't in a depressed state.

Yoshiki stared back at her, relief flooding through him at her statement. He smiled lightly, glancing down thoughtfully. "Oh... Good... That's... _really_ good," he muttered, unsure how to express his relief. She wasn't going to do anything so stupid... For the first time after she had cut him off, he had felt a rush of happiness. He was uncertain of what changed her mind. The attack? He wasn't sure why that would change her mind completely, but if it did, then... he was sort of thankful for it. Of course, he hadn't liked how much pain it had caused, but Ayumi dying would have hurt so much worse.

Ayumi smiled softly, something stirring inside her chest at his relief. She wished the giant, steel door wasn't between them, because all she wanted to do want hug him. She paused for a moment, looking at him with a small furrow in her brow. "Hey... do you remember anything before blacking out?" she finally got around to asking. If he didn't remember her words before he passed out, it was likely he didn't realize she had given up her previous resolve. Yoshiki was the only good thing in her life... and if she was choosing to keep living, she needed him.

Yoshiki was glad they were talking again... at least, for now. He began to get a little more comfortable, his arms folding over on the counter just outside the window where the tray was still sitting at. He blinked at her, a little confused. What... exactly had happened? He was a little worried. "Uhm, well... I don't remember anything happening really... Why? Did something bad happen?" he asked with a bit concern. Though there was no evidence such a thing had happened, he was still a little on edge. Ayumi could have been hurt, and he couldn't tell...

At confirmation he hadn't heard her last words to him, Ayumi began to feel a little embarrassed. His questioning towards what he missed was making her cheeks burn. It was easier to say those types of things when emotions were running high... While she felt emotional now, repeating what she had said made a certain shyness come over her. It wasn't a confession... well, it was of sorts. She owed it to him though, didn't she? After all, he had told her... "Oh, uh, no... I just..." she stumbled a bit. Her hand moved to her other arm, rubbing it anxiously. Should she just blurt it out? It felt out of context now, but it would firmly put their relationship back on a better track, right? She took a deep breath before looking at him. "I just want you to know... I need you too," she said, forcing herself to keep looking at him despite how much she wanted to stare at the floor.

Yoshiki relaxed, glad nothing was bad about anything. However, he didn't know what would be so important that she had to make sure he knew. He grew attentive as she began to talk again, and his heart gave a small skip when it finally came out. Well, it wasn't a confession or anything, but... it alleviated all his pain at once, and made him a little flustered. He glanced away, a small blush creeping up. "Oh...," he muttered, since he had nothing else to say. He then looked back at her, his hopes rising. "Does that mean... I can visit again?" he asked eagerly, not meaning to seem so pathetic, but... he couldn't help it. He had been struggling with this for what felt like an eternity.

Ayumi smiled at his eager question, her entire body warming up. She had missed him so much... Even when she had been purposefully trying to push him away. While none of her old fears had diminished very much, that didn't mean she had to push Yoshiki out of her life. "If you want to," she answered, feeling a burst of happiness that he was asking that. Her cheerful expression flickered for a moment when she had to put out her own request to that. "Just... don't bring anything sharp..." she added with a glance aside. It was too risky... the books were less so, but to put pencils in her hands seemed reckless.

Yoshiki gave a shaky sigh, feeling like the weight that had been crushing him was lifted. He looked at her a moment, before giving a small nod. "Yeah, okay... sorry...," he said, since it had been his idea to bring the art supplies. She had gotten to draw again, but now it was just taken away from her. Of course he felt bad... but he was mostly overjoyed that he could be with her again. Err, as friends...

"Don't apologize," Ayumi said firmly, giving a small shake of her head to it. It had been a really nice thought, and she loved the chance to be able to draw again. It was just the chance of her hurting him that she couldn't bear. Her eyes then moved to the tray of food she hadn't touched. When he had been gone that week, she had forced herself to eat the cafeteria food. She had forgotten how disgusting it really was, but she felt like she owed it to start eating again. She was incredibly relieved to see real food in front of her again, courtesy of Yoshiki... "Oh! Do you have Cocoa?" she suddenly asked when the thought entered her head. In some point in her depression, she had noticed the plushie missing. She guessed the guards grabbed the odd object after the pencil incident.

Yoshiki wasn't sure he could be let off guilt free, but that hardly mattered anymore. Even in the small stretch of silence, he was glad the could return as they were. He looked at her curiously, trying to imagine what she meant. It didn't take him long, of course. What else could she have meant? "Cocoa? Heh, yeah, I do, actually. I'll get back to you at lunch, okay?" he asked with a light smile, finding the name cute. Well, it proved that it made her feel better, and gave her some sort of comfort.

When Yoshiki echoed the name back to her, Ayumi realized with mortification that she has called Cocoa her name and not just 'plushie'. Well, he wasn't teasing her or acknowledging it much, besides the small chuckle. Still, her face was burning red that she was so old and had a plushie which she had given a nickname... She nodded in response, resisting the urge to hide her face behind a hand. "O-okay, thanks," she said with a small smile.

Yoshiki nodded to her, and though he'd like to stay and talk, that would have to wait for an off day. He left and went on with his business, though as it approached lunch time, he went to go by his locker. He pulled the whole backpack out, since he still didn't want to be seen carrying around a plush everywhere. He grabbed the cart with the trays and went around, now a lot more eager to get to Ayumi. His old look had returned, perhaps even more enthusiastic than before. Probably because this had been such a good surprise... When he got to Ayumi, he slid through the tray, but also pulled around his backpack and took out 'Cocoa'. He slid the small plush through the window as well, since he had wanted to give it back to her since the day he had been shoved out of her room. "There. Cocoa's now back in your hands," he noted with a smile. He wasn't really making fun of her... He instead thought it was cute, and her reaction to him finding out was even more so.

Ayumi felt much better, even after Yoshiki went on his way back to work. The relief that he was alive and that their relationship was back where it had been... It was wonderful. The elation was shot down a little when she returned to sit down on her bed and stared at the four walls around her. What were they aiming for now...? Nakano would never let her out of here, because she didn't believe in psychics and spirits. She wanted so badly to get out of this prison... and to live with Yoshiki. It was all she wanted, but knowing it could never happen brought that fear that she was dragging Yoshiki down... After all, even if she _could_ get out, it didn't mean she should. She was undeniably dangerous... She'd have to talk to him about all of this at some point... Not that he'd quit the job and go back to school without her, because she was quite aware how stubborn he really was. They made that pact, but she had no way of fulfilling her side of it.

At some point through all the thinking, lunchtime rolled around. She approached the door, brightening at the sight of Cocoa. She picked up the soft plushie, hugging it lightly... Nng, it smelled like him after being in his care for so long... The thought flushed her cheeks slightly, but what he said in addition to giving it back made her entire face go red. "Urgh, shut up," she groaned in embarrassment and buried her head into Cocoa.

Yoshiki chuckled at her reaction, though it was mostly to cover up what he really thought about it. He couldn't have just stared and took in the sight, right? It was a little too risky to give anything away about his deeper emotions, since not only was he afraid of rejection, but he was also careful because of their situation. For that to be a known element in their relationship, it was bound to cause problems... After all, was her getting out really feasible at all? He would be really happy if she could, but with all these factors, he wouldn't get his hopes up for it... He'd just settle for the times he visited, and the type of contact they were allowed.

* * *

Ayumi always preferred the days Yoshiki was visiting as opposed to working, because it was nice to just have him around for hours. She had grown so used to his company, that when they hadn't been seeing each other, she could really feel it. Although, as she continued reading her psychic books, she felt that concern bubbling up again. She wasn't sure if she was capable of completely controlling her psychic ability... Which meant she could never get out... Which meant Yoshiki wouldn't go back to school. She stopped reading and glanced over to him. She didn't want to upset the nice balance they recently achieved again, but it was something they had to talk about. "I think you should go back to school now," she told him bluntly, just wanting to dive into the conversation. It wasn't like she was telling him to cut ties with her again... If he did go back, of course she hoped he'd still visit her occasionally.

Yoshiki was glad to be back to their old routine. On his next day off, it had felt so good to sit right beside her again. Feel her warmth... Err, actually, that sounded a bit creepy... He stopped thinking about it, eyes glazing over the book that he hardly understood a word of. At Ayumi's voice, he looked up at her, quiet for a moment. Then, his brows furrowed, as he had hoped not to run into this situation again. "I won't... not yet," he told her, still firm in his decision.

Ayumi had expected him to say no, because she knew him well enough by this point, but she hadn't expected that little 'not yet.' She paused, staring at him in a rush of confusion. Did he still think she could get out of this place? He had way too much faith in her... And Nakano, it seemed. She would never be signed off as safe. Along with being an A patient, Ayumi understood her episodes were so sporadic and unpredictable that she couldn't blame the psychiatrist. "I can never fulfill my half of our deal... But, that doesn't mean you shouldn't go forward with what you said," she said, trying to dodge the actual phrasing that she would trapped in these walls until she died.

Yoshiki glanced away, knowing she was probably right, but... he still couldn't. If she was never getting out, he'd much rather stay by her side. "But it does, for me... Quitting this place and going back to school means I'll be back on a part time job, working almost everyday. I won't get to come here often, if at all," he explained to her, his chest feeling tight at the idea of another separation. He shook his head lightly, then gave her a stern look. "I know you care about my future... but having a good life doesn't necessarily include a scholarship or more money... I... You're what makes my life better...," he admitted with a bit of embarrassment, looking away again, since it was already a little hard for him to get out in the first place.

Ayumi looked down, stomach dropping as he explained that if he went back to school and she was still here, they would rarely see each other. It was the very last thing she wanted, since he was the only good thing in her life. The thought of him disappearing from her life was painful, but she couldn't let herself selfishly keep him here for her sake. Her eyes flickered up at him, heart catching at his words. It was impossible to stop her face from heating up to a bright red. It was hard to believe she managed to do anything positive for his life when all it felt like was she took from him. She didn't doubt the sincerity in his words, though. "I don't want to hold you back. You deserve better than this place... and me," she said with a slight quiver in her voice. He was a good person... If he wanted to go out into the world and forge new connections, he could.

Yoshiki gave a soft sigh at her overly pessimistic view, mostly about herself. Just because she was stuck here didn't mean he was wasting his time with her. He felt so much better around her than anyone else, and the attachment that kept growing probably wasn't going away. "Don't talk like that. I feel lucky actually that you talk to me like this. Besides, you're not holding me back. I'm choosing to sit here, with you, because it's what I want to do," he explained further, though it was making his blush worsen and making it absolutely impossible to make eye contact.

Ayumi had no idea what she had done to earn his loyalty, but she was incredibly happy she had it. Even if there was some guilt that he wasn't going back to school, there was also a lot of relief. She... didn't want to go on without him. And all he wanted in return... was to be a good thing for her. She could remember that day so clearly, though it felt like an eternity ago. She had basically been demanding an explanation for his odd, nice behavior... and that's all he wanted. She was feeling sappy and emotional, and as a result, she needed a hug. She shifted, the book on her lap closing and falling off to the mattress, and wrapped her arms tightly around him. Her head nestled against his shoulder, the contact flooding her senses. "You're the best thing in my life Yoshiki," she said against him, "I don't know what I'd do without you." She realized her tune had changed, because just moments ago she was telling him to go back to school, but now she was just overjoyed by him wanting to stay by her side. It was a contrast of a conflict, but ultimately she had to give in to both their desires. There was still the dim, yet unrealistic hope that she would get out, and he could still pursue a better life.

Yoshiki looked over at the light sound of the book slumping against the mattress, though he hadn't been expecting Ayumi's next action. At the contact, his heart jumped into his throat, and he was stunned for a moment. He didn't know why he was being so pathetic... They had hugged before, and he hadn't had such a strong reaction. He guessed it was because Ayumi initiated it, and they hadn't been together for a long time. Eventually, he felt soothed in the embrace, closing his eyes as a smile formed. His arms wrapped around her sides tightly, and somewhat possessively. "Likewise," he muttered with a small, light chuckle.


	10. Chapter 10

Ayumi's eyes were growing tired from reading one of the new books Yoshiki had brought in for her. It was amazing to read all these psychics sharing their stories and communications with spirits, to the point that her abilities almost didn't seem like a curse. All these people lived their lives, with little concern that they would ever kill anyone... Of course, Ayumi had never realized that the entire asylum was probably an angry spiritual hotbed, considering what went on in the past and what was still going on. Of course, she was still nervous about ever snapping and hurting Yoshiki again, but she was slowly pushing herself back into her previous determination to get out. She just had to find something to convince Nakano... She shut her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose to try and relieve the pressure building in the front of her head. How long had she been reading? She leaned back away from the book, eyes moving over to Yoshiki. Her thoughts shifted away from psychics and onto him, causing that fluttering feeling to erupt in her stomach. She liked him a little too much... to a point where she wouldn't attach such a lofty term as a 'crush' on how she felt. It was a little scary, since she had never experienced these types of feelings... But also, he was the only person in her life that meant anything to her. To have these feelings leaked or confessed... it could pull everything from the seams. Her fingers traced the top of her book, and she realized she was staring. She glanced aside, finding a question come to mind. She forced herself to look back, hoping he was oblivious to her long looks. "Hey, have you ever had a girlfriend?" she asked, the question coming out before she could stop herself. She immediately regretted it coming out of her mouth, since they didn't talk about these sorts of things... And honestly, she didn't want to hear about any ex-girlfriends that had had a chance to be with him intimately.

Yoshiki had been mostly focused on the book, while... occasionally stealing glances at Ayumi. He was trying his best not to stare though, so he hadn't noticed her own zoning out. His eyes snapped up to her at her voice, and he remained quiet for a small moment. It was weird of her to ask... and a little embarrassing to answer... But, when you're not interested, there's nothing to change that. "Uh, no, actually... Why?" he asked curiously, since it wasn't a topic they normally touched.

Ayumi glanced aside at his curious question, mentally cursing at herself. She had just been thinking how she couldn't let anything slip through, and now she goes and brings the conversation to that? Although, she had to admit, his answer was a little bit of a relief... It was incredibly possessive of her to even think that way, though. "Ah, just curious... I figured you would've had at least one," she admitted, a little flushed. Crap, this entire thing was her admitting to thinking about stuff like this... Crap, crap, crap, she needed to pull back and kill this conversation.

Yoshiki shook his head lightly, then glanced away as he mulled something over. He knew she had been in here since she was thirteen, but that didn't necessarily mean she hadn't had a boyfriend. "Well, no... err, did you have one? A boyfriend, I mean," he attempted to ask, but he was fumbling over his words a little. He wouldn't have normally asked her, but now they were on this track, and well... he couldn't resist asking.

At the question, Ayumi's panic was pushed away by amusement. She laughed lightly, shaking her head. "Oh god, no. I was only just noticing boys before this place. I had a crush on a classmate, but that's as far as that went," she answered, trying to remember that boy. She hadn't thought of him in years, considering the entire topic of boys being romantic interests stopped when all the boys in her life were cold-eyed guards. Although, now that she finally had a guy that she had romantic feelings towards, her hormones were very present and annoying.

Yoshiki nodded lightly, though he couldn't even really say he had had a crush before Ayumi... Well, he wasn't so sure 'crush' was the right word to use, but still... He didn't think so much about girls being attractive. His life had just been too hectic to focus on that sort of thing, especially when most of the girls he had been around annoyed him. He fidgeted a little to get more comfortable, though it was really because he was beginning to get a bit flustered. "I see... ah, do you remember... what he was like?" he asked without really thinking, but he was curious as to what type of guy she liked. Just... not worded so bluntly.

Ayumi blinked slowly at the question, finding her memory tested. Although, she was a little surprised that this conversation had turned in this direction... That he was actually interested in the scrap of a love life she had in her tender years of thirteen. "Uh, well, he was pretty mild-mannered... Polite, sweet, and kind. He was involved in all the class stuff and was pretty much friends with everyone," she recalled, the image becoming clearer as she recounted how she had once felt. "Oh, you know what... I think he was one of my key-deciding factors to decide I wanted to go to Kisaragi," she remembered with a small, pathetic laugh. Oh man, she had had it really bad for that boy. She remembered writing up the pros and cons for all the schools, and his name had been written pretty big in the pro column.

Yoshiki gave a small hum, seemingly a little bored with the info, but inside he was comparing himself to this mystery boy. Well, with her, he was nice... but not with others. Practically everything she listed had an x-mark on him, in his head. He only had one friend, and sometimes he got a little violent. Well, not with people who didn't ask for it, but still... he had been very intimidating in school, not really... friendly, or polite. So, at least now he knew he definitely wasn't her type. He stared at the ground in thought, somewhat deflated, but he'd still look at the bright side. They were still very close friends... and he was happy with that. As long as she was around in some way, he'd be pleased... though, a more intimate standing would be... nice.

Ayumi was taken out of her memories by the small reaction Yoshiki gave. Ahh, well... she guessed this stuff was on par with girl talk, so it wasn't overly surprising that he didn't respond. Well, it was probably safer for that conversation to wrap up... She was going to just go back to her book and let the topic fall to the wayside, but she found herself looking at him in concern. His eyes were stuck on the ground, and he seemed... off. "Yoshiki...? You okay?"she asked slowly, unsure if he was just lost in his own thoughts or upset about something.

Yoshiki glanced at her, but then adverted his eyes to the side. "Uh, yeah, fine... It's just...," he muttered, trying to figure out what he had been planning on saying. Gah, he should have just left it with 'fine'. He took a long pause before giving a small chuckle, though it sort of sounded a little nervous. "Aah, it's... pretty weird you'd be friends with someone like me then," he finally said, finding the statement good enough. At least, he didn't think it gave anything away.

Ayumi stared at him, trying to figure out what he was going to say. It's stupid to think he'd be jealous of a crush she had years ago, right? Of course it was. Because that would mean... Her rambling thoughts were grounded when he got out the rest of his sentence. She tilted her head, looking at him with a furrowed brow. "What do you mean?" she asked, not following his train of logic that brought him there.

Yoshiki would've liked the conversation to end there, but he had no such luck. He gave a small shrug, suppressing the urge to sigh. "It's just... I'm not many of those things, so you'd think we wouldn't get along," he explained nervously, even if he wasn't really telling her the truth. He was more thinking about how his traits would probably turn her away rather than earn him a chance.

Ayumi was still surprised he was saying all this, even with his explanation. After all, a crush's personality didn't indicate what she wanted out of every person in her life. More importantly, though, this was what she had been looking at years ago. If she saw that guy now, she doubted any of the old feelings would be dragged up. She looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "Geeze, Yoshiki, I'm not thirteen anymore. I've changed quite a bit since then and so has my taste." She secretly meant taste in love, but in the context they were talking about... it would be easy to pass off as what she looked for in the people in her life.

Yoshiki became more embarrassed at her comment, feeling silly for having said anything. Though, there was still that stupid insecurity. Tastes may change, but surely not to the complete opposite. "Uh, y-yeah... sorry," he said, but it only made him worse, as he was unsure what he was apologizing for. Ugh, this was turning into a mess... He didn't try to correct it though, because he was certain he'd just make everything worse.

Yoshiki's behavior was really confusing Ayumi, and she didn't like it. She wasn't sure how to deal with him... Heck, he had stuttered. "It's okay," she said lightly, not offended by what he had been saying. She was actually more concerned by his behavior, and she wanted to calm him back down to before they had discussed any of this. "But... uh, so you know... you do fit into my tastes more than you were saying," she said, but her mind instantly picked up on how that might have been interpreted and she hurried to amend it. "I mean, you're nice, sweet, incredibly loyal... If we had met under normal circumstances in high school, I think we still would have been friends," she tried to explain, her face turning a light shade of red.

Yoshiki looked at her, his heart jumping slightly. Of course, he realized she meant her taste in friends... but still, the way it was worded got him needlessly excited. He glanced away, his blush getting a bit harder as she described him. His eyes were downcast for a small moment of consideration, but if he thought too much, he'd never do anything about this situation. Of course there was the fear of ruining everything, but holding this sort of stuff in... it was harder than he once thought. "Would that be... what you'd be looking for in a boyfriend, too?" he asked while his gaze was still to the side, his heart picking up at the rather obvious question. He wished he could take the words back, but they were out now. He felt better half saying it, though, so he was a little glad he didn't dwell on it and let the festering fear stop him from speaking.

Ayumi watched him, noticing the downcast of his eyes and for a moment she thought she might have upset him. Her mind suddenly stalled at the unexpected question, and it felt like everything short-circuited. W...was he asking if she would look at him as a potential boyfriend? But, if he was asking that, did that mean he was actually interested in her? It felt completely impossible to have her feelings returned, but the questioned sparked a hope in her that she hadn't had before. She swallowed thickly, finding it hard to answer because she so desperately didn't want to mess anything up. She tried to reign herself back, but thoughts of Yoshiki as her boyfriend... She wanted him, badly. "Of course," she answered a lot more evenly than she expected. Her face was a bright red, but she kept her eyes on him. It felt like she was admitting she was looking at him like a boyfriend, which wasn't false, but it was embarrassing and scary to admit aloud.

Yoshiki looked up at her, considering her positive answer. Did that mean... he was an interest, or just guys like him? It could be possible that she thought of him strictly as a friend, in which case doing anything drastic could still tear down their progress. But he did want to see what it felt like... He glanced down, guessing he'd compromise with himself. He'd do something that could be a lot more easily turned down then anything intensely forward. His hand went over hesitantly, intertwining their fingers rather than simply holding her hand, as they had done many times before. His heart was beating fast in anxiety, but he was mostly glad he did it, no matter the outcome. His blush was still there, though it had lessened. Mostly because he wanted this sort of contact... Being intimate with her excited him rather than embarrassed him, and his fear also dulled down the other feelings.

Ayumi was unsure of how he would respond to that bit of information. Also, she didn't know if he was interpreting that how she sort of hoped he would... It was terrifying and embarrassing to be rejected, though, so she was split on how she wanted everything to unroll. The blush on her face deepened a shade at the feeling of his fingers moving between hers. Her breath caught in her throat, and her heart went into overdrive. Hand holding wasn't anything new for them... but it was typically used as a form of comfort, and while his hand was comforting, the entire thing felt a little more... intimate? Besides the context of the contact, there was also the fact it was a different type, that definitely led her to believe that this may be a sign of... well, what she had been hoping for. She returned the grip, blood rushing excitably. She couldn't stop a small, shy smile from surfacing. The entire thing was making it so tempting, and less scary, to just blurt out how she felt.

Yoshiki grew confidence as she returned the grip, his eyes finally making their way back to hers. He registered her smile, though he could barely believe this thing was mutual... Their situation made this development a little weird too, but he didn't mind, as long as he could stay by her side. He glanced away, his blush deepening slightly as a soft smile formed, and an idea moved into his head. He scooted a little closer as his mind urged him on. They could do routine confessions... but he felt it was a little unnecessary, for now. Of course it felt good to say it, but he had a different thing his heart was eager to test. It's development depended on her response, and while there was still the possibility this could be rejected as 'too fast', he was willing to try. He looked at her as his hand squeezed hers, before leaning in to press his lips against hers, closing his eyes. The contact had a dizzying effect and made him feel completely blissful, despite how innocent some would judge it.

Ayumi felt her level of embarrassment go up when his eyes met hers. She wasn't sure how to carry out anything. Flirting, actions, what to say... Her mind felt like a blank slate that could only register how nice his hand always felt. His hand was squeezing hers, but before she could return the gesture, she was cut off by the feeling of his lips against hers. For a small moment, there was shock, but that quickly subsided to the actual feeling of the kiss. All her panicked, unsure thoughts were hushed into silence as she leaned into the contact and kissed back, eyes falling shut blissfully. In the back of her mind she had to marvel at what this all meant. Yoshiki liked her... in the way he wanted to intertwine his fingers with hers and kiss her. It was unbelievable and incredible.

Yoshiki was encouraged further at her willingness. The hand that wasn't occupied with her's moved to her side. He wanted to test a little about the boundaries of intimacy. Of course, there was already a standard stopping point of when the institution would say its too much. Not that he was even going to attempt that, but it was a detail that probably needed to be remembered, whether or not it would come into practice. His hand moved up to her back as he started to lean her down. He was mostly pulling this from instinct, but it felt good and right so far, so he kept going with it.

Ayumi felt a pleasurable shiver down her spine at the feeling of his hand on her side. Being this way with him made her feel protected and cared for, which was amazing considering she had no connection to anyone just months ago. Her free hand moved onto his shoulder and slowly moved over to rest on the nape of his neck. She shifted a little as she felt him begin to lean her down. She followed his lead with no objection, everything they were doing felt right... Like things were finally clicking into place. The book that laid abandoned on her lap was shifted by her movement, the novel spilling off her lap and onto the floor with a small clap. She couldn't be bothered to deal with picking it up, though. She was too eager to feel Yoshiki.

Yoshiki had to separate their hands to place his hand against the bed, to hold himself over her as his other hand supported her at her back. Anything further would just be in indulging in this euphoric feeling, and maybe taking in a bit more of her body... Though, he was keeping the request of tongue out of it, partly because of feeling it was too fast, and the other part was fear he wouldn't do well. So, he sort of wanted to hold it off... Of course, he wouldn't refuse her if she initiated, but he was still nervous about performance. He didn't pay much mind about the book either for now, since he loved this feeling almost too much to separate for anything.

Ayumi arched her back lightly against him, the feeling of his body against hers was something she found pure pleasure from. Although they had hugged countless times, this pressure between them was much different in nature. Her body was warm, cheeks flushed, but she had no desire in slowing this down. She was a little embarrassed by wanting the kiss to move on, even if she no clue what she was doing. All her information on this stuff stopped when she had been thirteen, but she was pretty sure she'd be able to figure it out by feeling and reaction. She hesitated for a moment, incredibly nervous but excited as well. Her tongue shyly moved in the request to further the kiss. Even if she had little idea of what she was doing, she was glad to be able to learn all this with him.

Yoshiki felt a spike of pleasure as she pressed herself closer against him. It was a bit strange how fast they were moving... but he guessed multiple factors went into it. It depended on how long they had liked one another, and how much tension had formed between them. That, and Ayumi was starved of contact over a period of five years. He felt a bit of excitement, though also a little dread, when she asked to move everything another step forward. He obliged, feeling that if he hesitated, it would make him worse at it. He'd just try going with the flow, doing what his body wanted. His tongue twisted with hers eagerly, taking in her taste and how warm this all made his stomach feel. He felt a bit light headed, but in a good way. A very good way.

Ayumi's heart lurched in her chest when his tongue moved against hers. It was definitely different than anything she's ever felt. She couldn't compare the sensations shooting through her limbs to anything, but the entire experience felt so good. She was already addicted with the feeling, which was a little scary how hard she felt herself falling for him even more now that he was hers. She pushed off thoughts of a future and how long they could manage this type of relationship with her being trapped in here. She was concentrating on the now, and right now she felt blissful in his arms. Though, she noticed her lungs beginning to burn after some time. She didn't want to pull away, but breathing wasn't something she could pass on doing. She tugged back a little, breaking the contact of their mouths to pant heavily. Her eyes opened to half-lid, dazed by pleasure flowing through her.

Yoshiki was a bit disappointed that they had to pause, but he could only ignore the burning in his lungs for so long. Plus, maybe it was best they didn't get too heated. His head rested against her shoulder as he panted, his arm tightening around her as he felt even more possessive of her, perhaps now because she actually was his, and he didn't want to lose her to anyone. He still wasn't certain of the future, but he did know he'd never desert her. They had done so much together and went through a lot, so he felt their bond was tighter than the average couple's.

Ayumi smiled through her pants, leaning her head against his. She had never even began to think this would be possible for her... To find someone she could rely on and trust. He would never abandon her because of her possessions, and she was determined to stay by his side as well. She was overflowing with happiness, she couldn't stop the actual confession from coming out. "I love you," she said breathlessly. Although, the moment it left her mouth, she panicked if that was way too much considering this had just started.

Yoshiki smiled softly, his eyes shutting as he took in this more innocent warmth. He had never thought he would be able to forge a relationship like this... But now that he had it, he regretted nothing in the past. Ayumi was all he needed to be happy. At her confession, his heart rushed excitably. They were already this close... It was a little hard to comprehend how things ended up this way. "I love you too," he stated evenly, but also quiet, as a small, breathless chuckle escaped him. His grip on her tightened, everything now feeling right and somewhat euphoric.

Ayumi smiled lightly when he gripped her tightly. It was something completely new, the step in their relationship. She was thrilled it was happening... There was just something wonderful about being able to envelope herself in his warmth and not have to worry she would give something away. She shut her eyes, taking in a deep breath before sighing happily.

The rest of the visit carried on with the cuddling and just soaking in their new status. Of course, things eventually had to wrap up. She felt oddly cold when he got off of her so they could recollect the books they abandoned in the midst of heat. She shifted to the side of the bed, leaning over to pick up the book that had fallen over, backside up. She hardly registered the picture of the author, Kou Kibiki, but her eyes did manage to catch onto a single word. Her eyes widened as she frantically read the back of the book, describing the author's accomplishments, degrees, and whatnot. It was a sudden click in her mind when she realized they may have not been creative enough in thinking of a way to get her out. "W-we don't need Nakano," she said suddenly, reeling from her realization. If... if this worked... she could get out of here and go home with Yoshiki. She could have a free life.

Yoshiki had been preparing to leave. He didn't want to, really, but he couldn't stay there all night, despite how much he wanted to. He was already standing, pulling on his jacket, when he heard Ayumi's comment. He stared at her, confused for a moment. "What do you mean?" he asked, walking back over and sitting next to her. This seemed important, and if it had to do with getting her out, he'd give his complete and undivided attention.

Ayumi's thoughts were racing, and she was already getting ahead of herself, but if this worked... It had to work. She couldn't think of a reason it wouldn't. "To get out, I need a psychiatrist to sign off that I'm not a danger. So, we don't need Nakano to believe or sign off, we just need someone who is psychic or believes in psychics that is also a certified psychiatrist," she explained excitably, overjoyed by this. Of course, there would still be some things to figure out, and finding a psychiatrist to come here and do something like this may be difficult, but not impossible. "Someone like this guy," Ayumi said as she turned the book the pointed to the picture of the older man.

Yoshiki listened to her, his excitement growing over this new discovery. That's right, they didn't need Nakano's permission... so it was in their best interest to find someone who actually believed in ghosts and possessions. He eyed the guy on the back of the book, apparently some guy named Kou Kibiki. He was probably famous, since the book was quite expensive, but... there was still a chance. If they couldn't get him, there was probably some other guy like him out there somewhere. Basically, this meant Ayumi had a real chance of getting out. His face brightened, his eyes going to Ayumi. "That's... great! I'll do my best to get someone," he told her with a small nod. It'd take some time, but the promising future was enough to push him forward with this.

Ayumi couldn't stop smiling, the feeling everything was coming into place was too great. "Thank you," she said, not doubting that Yoshiki would try his hardest to get someone here for her. She was aware the wait to get out may still be long, especially if the psychiatrist was only willing to sign once a certain amount of time passed without incident... But, she genuinely felt that once she was out of this cesspool of a place, possessions wouldn't be a constant pressure on her mind. Things would be so much better when she got out.


	11. Chapter 11

Yoshiki had done some scrounging around the next few weeks. Of course, as expected, the hunt was challenging, and even when he found someone, it usually turned out that they wouldn't be 'able to make it'. He knew it was probably mostly because he couldn't offer a lot, if any at all, and Ayumi wasn't too 'interesting' to them. However, he did end up getting a hold of one person, who was supposedly coming in a week. In that time, Yoshiki tried his best to help Ayumi prepare for his assessment. It might be their only chance, since finding anyone else seemed hopeless at the time.

The week arrived much faster than Yoshiki was prepared for. On the day that was scheduled, he was both nervous and anxious, because it could either be Ayumi's ticket out, or something that further damned her.

* * *

Heavy footsteps resounded as a man came into the institution, his face somewhat scrunching once he was a few feet in. This place was despicable, wreaking of bad vibes and malicious, out of control evilness. A place that certainly wasn't good for a person such as himself, if the allegations were true. He hadn't actually wanted a payment, since this area intrigued him enough to come on his own. Well, that, and he was a strong believer in justice. For a sane person to be kept in here for so long, it was only a matter of time before they too went insane, and were robbed of their life. It was sad, so he was willing to throw his own hand into the ring. He also wasn't as famous as Kibiki, so his schedule had at least a few open days.

He strolled up to the front counter once he was done reflecting over the pressure in his head. He eyed the girl, who looked back up at him expectantly. Before she could ask if she could help him, he spoke up in a clear, even voice. "I'm here to assess a patient by the name of Shinozaki Ayumi, and this facility," he told her in a strong tone, sweeping some short black locks to behind his ear. The girl stared at him strangely, before getting out some paperwork.

"U-um, and... what's your name, sir?" she asked, uncertain how to deal with the blunt man. Ayumi was an A class patient... Why was a psychiatrist coming to assess her?

The young man stood straight, not too fond of all this customary paperwork, but they likely would keep him here all day if he didn't comply. "Sengoku Kaeru, psychiatrist from the Ehime prefecture," he answered clearly, watching with a somewhat apathetic expression as the girl wrote down the name. She handed him a pass, and he was on his way. He did need a guard to go the the A patient section, but he wanted to get a deeper look at this facility. He came to the door of the person he was pointed to who basically held most of the records. He knocked once, but came in before even waiting for an answer. He wanted to get straight to business. He sized up the other psychiatrist for a small moment before speaking. "Hello... I was told to come to you for records, correct?" he asked, still being pretty brazen, even with the more official woman.

Nakano's eyes glanced up at the knock to her door. Before she could even collect her thoughts or begin to get up, a young man came barging into her office. She felt a flare of annoyance at the pushy behavior, not appreciative of the tactless entrance. Even if he had knocked, it was proper to wait for an indication he should come in. Her eyes narrowed slightly, lips pursed in irritation. "Yes, I have access to the records. What is your business?" she asked with a sharpness in her tone. She had never seen this man before, and that in itself was unusual. The fact he was interested in records of her patients was even weirder.

Kaeru could tell she was annoyed by his behavior, but his own patience was being tested by this place. He hated all the mandatory 'checking out' that had to be done before he got to actually do what he had come here for. His expression didn't change though, her irritation not phasing him. "I've come here to see a Shinozaki Ayumi. I'd like to see her records, and any of patients that have passed in this facility," he explained to her, trying to shorten his answer as much as possible.

Nakano raised her eyebrow at his answer. She knew for a fact she had not been fired or in the process of being replaced, since she basically ran the facility as far as the patients were concerned. The owner of the ward was mostly a figurehead who dealt with fiscal responsibilities. He wouldn't aim to push her out, so she had no idea why some person would come in demanding information on her patients. Though... she noticed Shinozaki Ayumi was mentioned by name. Was this that Kishinuma boys doing? She felt her annoyance flicker into anger. And why did he want to know about dead patients? "Why exactly are you interested in an A patient? Don't tell me you play into the idea that she has a connection to the dead," she said with a small scoff. Yoshiki had found some hack that believed in the make-believe world of the paranormal? It was all she could piece together that made sense.

Kaeru felt a spike in annoyance at her choice of words. It irritated him enough that he was being questioned, but this woman in particular was annoying him. "I don't _play_, miss," he noted sharply, his eyes narrowing, but not enough to be really noticeable. "I don't really care about your opinion on the matter of the paranormal, I'm just here to see if the people that run this place are ignorant enough to ruin a little girl's life unnecessarily, and perhaps put a stop to it. I'm not giving her pity, I _will_ be looking at this thoroughly, so if you're completely certain she is mentally ill, you shouldn't have a problem with me researching it myself," he told her, not standing for people questioning his own profession. People who didn't believe were of no interest to him, and he always found them a pain to deal with. They were always so insistent of 'proving him wrong' and the like.

Nakano's blood was boiling at the way this strange man was conducting himself. She hadn't ruined that girls life, she had protected Ayumi's classmates, family, and anyone else who would have been unfortunate to be near her during an episode. The idea this man thought she had misdiagnosed her and that she was actually psychic was ridiculous. Though, it came down to having faith in her own decision. She let out a heavy, annoyed sigh. "Very well, I will print you the documents. You'll see she's too dangerous to allow to join the general population," Nakano said, having little intention to argue with this man past that Ayumi's dangerous nature would shine through. She clicked around on her computer to print the records of Ayumi and the patients who passed under their care.

Kaeru seemed satisfied with her answer, his look easing back into neutral. "Thank you," he said as he waited for the papers to print. If Ayumi Shinozaki was a psychic, just extremely under-trained and unprepared, he could find correlations with her 'episodes' and the problems past patients had. He only needed a few of these comparisons to make a good case, seeing as how it was pretty damning evidence, whether a person believed in spirits or not.

Nakano answered with a stiff nod, still finding it hard to believe someone would be willing to believe such childish nonsense as ghosts and spirits. She turned around in her chair, the printer spitting out the many documents of all of Ayumi's episodes and then eventually the dead's records. It took a while, given how long the facility had been around. Once done, she took them all, tapping them on her desk to even all the papers together in a perfect line. She held them out, expression hard. "Here you go," she said, wholly unamused by all of this. "If you wish to meet her, you'll have to find a guard to accompany you," she added, since she could only guess he'd be interested in seeing her face-to-face. The fact another person was coming in to assess what she had already done was infuriating. She almost felt like calling Yoshiki in to yell at him for under-minding her like this.

Kaeru nodded at her advice, taking the papers and glancing over the front one for a small moment. This would take a while of analyzing, before he could even begin to really assess the patient face to face...

* * *

It was a few hours later that he had gotten satisfactory information from the papers. He had read all of Ayumi's records, the first thing he noticed about them was that her outbreaks had severely decreased these recent months. He'd have to ask her about that... Another thing that convinced him further was that other from the serious episodes, she seemed completely normal. Also, in the past, the amount of her episodes decreased around times that it was suspected that she was skipping on medication. Heh, how ignorant these psychiatrists were... They were so adamant in not believing something they simply could not understand, even though any other solution made no sense with the given evidence.

Then he got to the past patients that had died at the facility, either from suicide, nutritional problems, illnesses, or just old age. A satisfied smile crossed his face as he sat alone in the waiting room, his eyes coming across several patients that corresponded with some of Ayumi's episodes. After finding a significant number of these similarities, he figured that it was time to talk with Ayumi herself. So, he tapped the papers on his desk to straighten them, and sought to go find a guard. After some rummaging around, he came across one and got them to lead him to Ayumi after showing his pass. Once he entered her room, the pressure worsened on his head. Were they perhaps... flocking to her? It was interesting, but couldn't be used in a sign-off report.

He went further into her room, glancing down at the papers before looking up at her as the heavy door shut with a clank. He had requested that the guard not be in the room, which he had advised against, but he didn't care. He wanted a private session, and the girl wasn't dangerous by herself, even if she did turn out to be crazy, which he was highly doubting at this point. "Hello, Shinozaki Ayumi, I presume? My name is Sengoku Kaeru. I'm a psychiatrist from Seiyu, in the Ehime district," he introduced, sitting next to her.

Ayumi had felt a heavy stress build up over the week she had been waiting for the psychiatrist to come. It was such an enormous pressure to suddenly have on her head, because she was worried if she said or behaved the wrong way, they may write off the idea of her being psychic. She wanted to get out of here so desperately, even more now that Yoshiki's life was so tightly tied with hers. She didn't want to fail him, but there was little she could do in preparation, which only increased the stress. Her stomach had been flip-flopping all week, and she couldn't shake the anxiety. The day he was scheduled to come rolled around, and all the nervousness only increased. She couldn't remember ever feeling this much strain on herself in her entire life. If this didn't work out... She knew how hard Yoshiki worked to find someone who was willing to come see her. The amount of psychic-believing psychiatrists wasn't exactly high, and many turned down the trip that they wouldn't get money out of. The fact this guy was willing to use his own time to see her proved he had to be opened minded... He would have to see the trust, right?

When the door finally opened and the man she presumed was a psychiatrist and psychic came in, she sat up alert. Her hands were folded in her lap, in an attempt to stop them from fiddling nervously. She gave a small nod in confirmation the he correctly knew her name. Her heart was fluttering in a panic, but she tried her best to not let that slip her up. "It's nice to meet you, Mr. Sengoku. Thank you for taking time out to come see me," she said with a small, polite smile.

Kaeru nodded to her, then glanced through the papers again. As he kept his eyes on the descriptions of her episodes, he figured he'd start to ask her a few things. Though already, she seemed completely normal, which was even impressive to him, considering not only spending five years in an asylum, but also perhaps being assaulted by countless spirits. "It's not a problem... Now, Shinozaki, it seems you've become quite docile these past months... Can you tell me what's changed? Your surroundings, or things you're doing differently?" he asked her, bringing out a pen he had kept in his pocket and readying it to write on the side of these documents.

Ayumi watched him as he looked through papers that she knew had to be on her. It was a little nerve-wracking to think the last five years of her life were summarized in her episodes on those papers. At his question, she paused for a moment in consideration of how to answer it. "Months ago, I was assigned a new guard... He ended up changing everything for me. He bought me meals because I refused to eat what the cafeteria served... He talked to me as a person and was willing to look into the idea of psychics. Soon, I saw him everyday, even on his days off. When he came to visit, he would bring books that revolved around the paranormal... He, uh, genuinely cares about me and my well-being, and since I've met him, the episodes just slowed to a crawl," she explained with a small blush. Everything that was happening was only possible because Yoshiki took a chance on her. "He's the one who contacted you about meeting me," she added, even though he might have figured that out already.

Kaeru listened to her closely, flipping through some pages that had the assigned guards. There were several, but the most recent were Yoshiki and another guard in charge of her pills, but the other name sounded a lot more familiar. Her explanation confirmed that this guard was in fact the one that had searched him out. To go such lengths for one person, they'd have to be close... But he wasn't here to dig into her personal life. He just needed to know things that dealt with her progression these last months. So, there was more comfort and security in her position, which improved her stability most likely, but that didn't seem enough. He did recall something that stood out in her answer, though. "Paranormal books? What do these entail? Or, what did you absorb from them?" he asked her, finally glancing up from the documents after he got done writing a short draft of her morality improvement.

Ayumi nervousness wouldn't settle down, and she was beginning to feel like she was in a job interview. Not that she had ever gone through one, but she had to guess this was what that's like. "Oh, well, there's a lot I learned from them... But the key points always came back to the body, mind, and soul. I read a lot of meditation and training techniques that's supposed to give one more control of their soul in the ways of guarding and... well, just being aware of it. It's hard to get into any deep meditation here, though, since my neighbors are almost always doing something to break my concentration. Also, another point that stood out was the toxicity of certain areas over others in terms of spirits that refuse to rest. I would guess this place would be pretty bad in terms of that, but I don't really know since it's the only place I've been since I've began to access the spiritual world," she answered, fingers intertwining nervously. She wished Yoshiki was here, but it was better off being a private session.

Kaeru scribbled down a summary of what she had said. It was a miracle they had gotten such books past the ignorant woman psychiatrist, but it was good they did. Otherwise, even if she wasn't insane, he wasn't sure he could approve her. Not that the outside world was as dangerous as this place, but it was still dangerous to take lightly. Even though she only had amateur experience, it was experience nonetheless. "Would you feel confident outside this place?" he asked, to test how much she thought of her own progress. Given that most places on the world weren't so littered with restless spirits like this place, if she could get by with weeks of a clean record here, she'd be fine outside. But he wanted to see what she thought.

Ayumi froze at the question, since it had been something she was dealing with herself. That moment where she snapped out of a possession to find she had hurt Yoshiki... It was still a knife in her side. She never wanted to hurt him, or anyone, again. She had been able to learn so much in the past months and put it into practice. She had to have faith in what she's learned and she was more than willing to put in the work to make sure nothing like that ever happened. "Yes... even if my skills are that of an amateur's, I feel that I can keep the spirits out, and I will continue to hone my abilities," she answered evenly. She could handle the spirits in here... Surely, she would be able to keep that up. She was determined to.

Kaeru smiled at her response, feeling that she was honest with her answer, as opposed to big headed. He nodded, flipping through some more papers and then looking at his notes. It was a short interview... possibly the shortest assessment of his career, but the clarity in her tone was completely undeniable. She was obviously not crazy, just misinformed of her lineage, and therefore completely defenseless against the dead. He stood, nodding lightly before looking at her. "Alright then... That's all I need. Let's see if we can get this straightened out," he said before signalling the guard to open the door for him. He hadn't required a long session, since most of his evidence was in the records. Her statement just helped solidify his decision. Once the door opened, he left to get down to business.

Ayumi's eyes followed him when he stood, and she felt a great deal of relief now that the assessment was finally over. She nodded slightly, a little dazed by what he just said. When gone, she thought the entire conversation over and his finishing words. He believed her... He was going to try and get her out. It was all coming together. Happy tears burned at the corner of her eyes. She was shocked that this was actually happening... She had accepted long ago that her entire life would be lived out in this cage, but now she was getting out.

Kaeru had brought his own international release form, since he knew there would be no persuading the psychiatrists here. It would have been an absolute pain to deal with them, when he didn't even have to. He didn't need to consult those who were too stupid and stubborn, when he was certain of his own decision. He wrote out the form, giving all the valid reasons. The similarities to patients Ayumi didn't even know, her improvement in surroundings, her clear manner of mind and speech, and her drastic improvement the last few months. Once it was filled out, which was around the late evening, he went to go turn it into the front desk woman, who handled release forms.

* * *

It wasn't an immediate thing, getting a date to be released. As Ayumi understood, there were some legal steps and approvals that had to go through. Still, progress was being made, so Ayumi couldn't be too impatient. It was a miracle any of this was happening, considering her status as an A patient. Although, Nakano was clearly upset, even coming so far as to bring Ayumi into her office and tell her she was making a grave mistake. Nakano went on and on about how Ayumi would kill someone, because they had no method of controlling her episodes. The older woman's words didn't dampen her spirits, though. Ayumi knew she was prepared for this...

That was until the day she was marked for release came. All her fears came barreling at her at once, and she was seriously considering everything Nakano had said. She had been confident with Kaeru before, but now she had to wonder how skilled she really was at pushing off the ghosts. She was a nervous wreck, watching the door with wide, alert eyes. She wasn't sure she could handle the outside world, yet. There was a lot out there for a girl who spent five years locked in a small, square prison cell.

Yoshiki had been eager for the day of release. Of course he was still nervous, but... there was more joy than fear of the future. They faced so much up to this point... They could make it, if they stuck together. He went to go to her room, not as a visitor, but as a ride out of here. Once the door was opened, he eagerly came in, but could tell she was anxious. He paused a moment, frowning lightly."Ayumi?... You'll do fine, you know that, right?" he asked as a reassuring smile formed. He stepped closer to her, grabbing her hand and giving a small tug to get her off the bed. He knew she'd probably be intimidated once the day was actually here, but he was prepared to help her in any way he could.

Ayumi knew she should be more excited, but there was a lot of fear that was clouding it away. She had essentially been a hermit for five years... She hadn't had access to anything and absolutely no freedom. She knew and was used to this lifestyle, though. The idea of everything being open to her was intimidating. She looked at Yoshiki, his smile making her feel a little better. Her hand gripped his, but the tug didn't urge her off the bed. "M...maybe we should postpone this..." she muttered, glancing aside. It was weird, the door was finally open to her, but she couldn't get herself out of it.

Yoshiki frowned lightly at her answer, but of course he wasn't willing to give up. He knew she was scared, and he knew why, but.. postponing wouldn't solve anything. "Ayumi... pushing it off won't change anything. I know there's a lot of uncertainty in this, but... you can't run, or else you'll be stuck here forever, despite everything it took to get here," he urged her, his hand giving hers a light squeeze. He moved down a little to be eye-to-eye with her, his expression softening. "It might be hard to face... but you won't be doing it alone," he reminded her, which also gave his heart a little jolt. That's right... they'd be supporting each other, and even living together. The prospect _was_ intimidating, but exciting at the same time.

Ayumi knew he was right... if she did allow herself to postpone this, she would probably never leave. She had to just break free and allow herself to deal with the changes as they came... She'd re-adapt. After all, she had been apart of society until she was thirteen, so it wasn't something she was completely foreign with. She would also hate to waste all the effort the two of them put into this. She looked at him when he shifted to meet her eyes. She smiled lightly at him and his much needed reminder. She leaned forward, her forehead resting against his. "You're right... Sorry, I guess I just let it all get to me," she quietly admitted. "It'll be fine." Because she had him as support.

Yoshiki felt warm at the affectionate contact. He closed his eyes and leaned against her, giving a light nod. "Yeah, that's right. We'll be okay," he whispered in affirmation. He let everything sink in and their warmth to be continued a little longer before he pulled away and stood, his hand tugging on her again as he smiled at her. She'd be able to leave, after five years, and they'd be able to truly be together, after several slow-moving, hectic months. It was a big step... but a very good one, to him.

It was the first time Ayumi would be leaving with him, instead of watching him disappear behind heavy steel doors. The fear that had fogged over her mind dispersed enough that she felt excitement once again. She stood up with him, smiling back. She wasn't sure what would happen with them, and she was well aware that it would not be easy. She was eager, though. Walking through the facility was like a dream, and it was easy to think she'd snap out of it and be back in her cell. That these past months would turn out to be nothing more than a crazy dream. That didn't happen, though. These steps she was taking were real. Her hand stayed gripped to Yoshiki's, the contact grounding her in a calmer place. When the front doors of the psych ward opened, and she felt the warm sun on her face for the first time in five years, she knew she was prepared to start her new life with Yoshiki by her side.


End file.
